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Is he really loyal?


Infidelity In an affair or suspect your significant other? Share your experiences and concerns here.

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Old 14th March 2019, 10:15 AM   #31
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The fact that he is bending over backwards to try to make up for a trivial argument is also a sign of guilt. He feels bad about what he is doing so he's trying to kiss your arse out of guilt. If this woman is a mutual friend why didn't you call her and ask her why she's leaning on your husband instead of you? I would have told her I'm privy to the conversations she's had regarding prostitution and bondage with my husband and I think it is disrespectful and inappropriate. Tell her to cease. If she tells your husband what you said and he gets angry with you - make all hell break loose.
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Old 14th March 2019, 6:00 PM   #32
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The fact that he is bending over backwards to try to make up for a trivial argument is also a sign of guilt. He feels bad about what he is doing so he's trying to kiss your arse out of guilt. If this woman is a mutual friend why didn't you call her and ask her why she's leaning on your husband instead of you? I would have told her I'm privy to the conversations she's had regarding prostitution and bondage with my husband and I think it is disrespectful and inappropriate. Tell her to cease. If she tells your husband what you said and he gets angry with you - make all hell break loose.
Yes i agree about him feeling guilty. This may or may not be related to the current situation though, as he has never felt like he is enough....major self esteem issues from a young age that we cant seem to heal.

I dont feel the need to defend myself about not interveening sooner.

Thanks for the suggestion pf a polygraph. I will keep that idea in my back pocket, although i doubt it will get that far.

Keep the advice coming! A lawyer is definatley on the cards. I guess im hoping it will all be amicable and we can do all of that together? Im surprisingly not angry, just grief stricken and ready to move on.
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Old 15th March 2019, 11:26 AM   #33
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I wasn't asking you to defend yourself but stand up for yourself and for your marriage. This woman should be put in her place.
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Old 15th March 2019, 5:30 PM   #34
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The fact that he is bending over backwards to try to make up for a trivial argument is also a sign of guilt.
Kinda doubtful.

It's all about covering his ASS, that's Job #1 for cheaters. Otherwise, his 'guilt' would drive him to tell her what he's really been doing, and all she's been getting from him is lies, lies and more lies.
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Old 16th March 2019, 6:57 PM   #35
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Well i guess is holding hands with jesus or whatever that ppster said, because he is NOT CHEATING with her

We talked lqst night...i started by asking if he ever has to leave work during the day amd he said not often but he has a couple of times recently....I asked who for and h said to go to this womans house....

BuT...heres the clincher none of us thought of...HE WAS COUNSELLING her husband.

He proved it rught awqy with appointment slips, bills and messages. He says he would never go see a woman alome and really doesnt go see people but this is someone he knows and he was totally broken down.....

So now im just a douche who puts a gps in her husbands car. No, i have reasons to have trust issues and we are going to work together to solve thwm.....even though we have 3 young kids and very little time!!!

Thanks all
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Old 18th March 2019, 3:22 PM   #36
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If it comes to the point where you absolutely must spill the beans, do NOT tell him about the tracker. Instead you can say a 'friend' saw you going to her house in the daytime, and decided that you needed to know... see what lie he spins. Unless your man is Jesus Christ, he has more than an interest in her spiritual well being - unless Jesus want to dabble in bondage with a prostitute... you might want to look up numbers he has dialed in the cell phone record to get an idea of how many calls he has made to her. Also, like others have said, placing a voice activated recorder in his car might tell you if he has a burner phone and what he is really saying. You can get one that looks like a USB stick from Amazon for around $30. One wife on this board a year or so ago put one of these in her husband's briefcase, and he never know how she found out the things she did... I have a feeling you need to prepare yourself for some really bad news...
In both Canada and the USA, it is illegal to record a conversation you are not part of without consent. If this was ever discovered, lets say under oath, when a judge asks how you obtained your evidence, you could face several years in prison. In Canada, you could get a max of 5 years, while it varies depending on the state in the USA. Learn the laws before you deploy some James Bond spy tactics.
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