Boyfriend sleeps with x wife when she feels precious

[Cat-dance]

Someone help me understand. Can you honestly love and sleep with 2 people? I feel tortured. He was my friend before we were lovers.

[LucreziaBorgia]

Your b/f might think that "loving and sleeping with two people" is possible but if that doesn't work for you, then what he thinks about the matter is a moot point. If it isn't working for you, you need to let him know. Let him know that you cannot be in a relationship like this, and if he doesn't intend to stop sleeping with his ex, then your relationship with him needs to end.

 

If he refuses to stop sleeping with his ex, then your options are limited: adapt to the "relationship" or leave it.

[jmargel]

That's total disresepect towards you. He is just using you. Let him go, he's not worth it.

[Cat-dance]

Thank you, great quotes. Feeling better today. We have set up some boundaries.

 

I was angry yesterday, because he wanted all. I gave him 3 options

 

1. Lovers - companions

2. Friends

3. Open relationship

 

He wouldn't budge until I sent him a message to forget me, I was serious, had a nice little grieving ceremony - a soak in the tub.

 

He couldn't cope, with the open relationship, (only if it is open on his side I guess)

I'm still a little peeved.

 

I feel like I've gained my power back. I've set some boundaries of my own

and made a promise to myself.

 

He chose box No. 1

[scratch]

Originally posted by Cat-dance

He couldn't cope, with the open relationship, (only if it is open on his side I guess)

I'm still a little peeved.

 

It's pretty rare that I take the woman's side on this board, but what you wrote here is the single most pathetic behavior a man can exhibit. If he wants to sleep with other people, that's fine, but then to turn around and tell you he can't cope with you doing it is absurd.

 

With one gesture, he manages to be weak about his own ability to deal with monogamy AND insecure about the fact that you may be with other people, hypocrisy at it's ugliest.

 

Congratulations, you've found a man who is neither a nice guy nor an attractive jerk. I don't see how you can look in the mirror and be okay with seeing a person who likes this guy.

[SoftDrink]

he chose only you...and you believe that? you don't think he'll just do it behind your back?

 

forget what he does in the future--how about what he's done to you already? why do you want that in your life?

 

he doesn't exactly sound worth it.

 

good luck with this one.

[whichwayisup]

What you need to do is take time to think. IS he worth it? Does he truely make you happy? IS he the right one for you. Can he give you want you want.

 

He doesn't sound like a great catch. And the EX is a factor! They've been sleeping together too, and now he is just gonna end it? And what - STILL be friends with her? He needs to end it completely, friendship and all - because he can't "just" be friends with her now. That is NOT fair to you.

 

Good luck and let us know how it goes.

[Cat-dance]

It would be so easy to just end it, anyone with any common sense would.

 

It has been difficult the last 2 weeks, a roller coaster of emotions, flood my mind.

 

I've have taken a step back, I've had to, in order to save some sanity.

 

I guess the hardest thing, which is our biggest connection, our beautiful baby.

 

Living separately may seem strange to some conformists, but I escaped from Japan with my 2 children 8 years ago, and didn't expect to venture down any particular path, apart from getting a job to support them.

 

I wonder how I can be so naive, not to see the flashing lights.

 

I feel anger but I can't hate, I feel love but I can't love.

 

Children, work and study take up my time.

 

I have never gone looking - trouble seems to find me

 

Karma? Early childhood experiences need to be resolved? Who knows, I wish Who would tell me.