Melanie1988 Posted November 22, 2018 Share Posted November 22, 2018 Hi Didn’t really know who to turn to but I must explain my situation! I’m married for 5 years and I love my husband. Can’t live without him at all! He’s everything I’ve wanted - good job, personality everything. He has a brother - he’s just got married and we’d have a good relationship. His wife is one of my close friends! Me and my husbands brother sometimes have this flirting thing. He is attractive and buff but we don’t act. In August I was in Ibiza on a hen, husbands brother we will call him Chris for now was in ibiza for someone’s stag. We bumped into each other several times and at a pool party it got quite flirtatious. We’ve al been drinking etc. That night we went to a club he was there with his mates and again still drinking it just got quite heated and flirty. We went outside and he was massively flirting. I told him I know he can’t keep his eyes pff me and he pushed me against a wall and first I thought he was angry. I then figured out he couldn’t hold his emotions. Told him we would regret it and he asked me if I was going to stop him and I didn’t respond. Next thing he f**** me against the wall and r was amazing. We spent the rest of trip flirting. Came back and he lives his life I live mine. We sometimes have flirty moments but nothing else. We don’t even talk about the incident. I feel bad for my husband though. I love my husband so much - but I feel bad sometimes (not all the time). Any thoughts or similar situations? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted November 22, 2018 Share Posted November 22, 2018 How would you feel if your husband screwed your sister behind your back? You engaged in a double betrayal against your husband and his brother's wife as well. You clearly have no respect toward your husband. Your husband deserves better. Eventually, this will come out and absolutely destroy your husband. You judge a person by their actions and your actions speak volumes about who you are. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Simple Logic Posted November 23, 2018 Share Posted November 23, 2018 Thoughts? Your days of marriage are probably numbered. Link to post Share on other sites
Amethyst68 Posted November 23, 2018 Share Posted November 23, 2018 I hope you can live without your husband as I doubt your marriage will last for much longer! I'm not sure of the reasons of this post, there's certainly no remorse, very little regret, in fact it's almost as if you're boasting about cheating with your husband's brother. This is going to be tough but it is probably the biggest betrayal you could ever do and you don't even feel bad most of the time, wow, says a lot about your lack of character and integrity. You should tell your husband and let him go. Let him find someone who will treat him with respect. Otherwise I suspect there will be a replay the next time you are alone. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
MrVegas Posted November 23, 2018 Share Posted November 23, 2018 It would be just as believable as if her post started with “Dear Penthouse Forums” This whole premise, if true, is just brutal. Agree with Amethyst68, it’s like you wants a high five. Lucky for you that you only feel bad sometimes huh. What you did was a brutal betrayal, what your brother in law did somehow managed to be a bigger betrayal. Maybe you two deserve each other, maybe not. But your husband and his wife deserve the truth. I would highly doubt this doesn’t become a regular, and the longer it goes, the worse the fallout will be. And fallout is the right term because when this hits the light of day, it will be nuclear. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
smi11ie Posted November 23, 2018 Share Posted November 23, 2018 Wife cheating with brother (or father) is a guy's worst nightmare. You have changed from his wife to his worst enemy. If this is true then you are trying to destroy his family, I see no other motivation. I am not interested to hear "I couldn't help myself" or "there was so much chemistry". Why are you even flirting with your husband's brother? There are no excuses. You should file for divorce and move far away and never bother this family again. His brother is a low life too. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Colin Grant Posted November 23, 2018 Share Posted November 23, 2018 (edited) Marriages are exclusive covenants. Your decision to permit your brother in-law to flirt with you gave him confidence to corner you. You don't know it, but from a guys perspective, you allowed the "tip" in. Full consummation was inevitable, and he knew it. First opportunity he gets, he's in balls deep. Just for good measure and conscience, he asked if you were stopping him. He sought permission but already knew the answer. You were easy and men know easy, trust me. This is more like the 11th grade stuff than consenting adults, but lust and lost boundaries result in sex. It is what it is. The damage is irreparable, whether you decide to confess or not. Your brother in law KNOWS he has a play-thing candidate and men love play things. Let's talk about your husband. He's been double betrayed. Betrayal is bad enough. For the betrayed, when family is the AP, permanent emotional disability and trauma is the result. Husband will never be the same. It'll come out. 1 moth, 1 year, or 10 years. It'll come out. Secrets are like water. Somehow, through cracks and crevices, it seeps through. Let's talk about you. You're not done, despite your so called love for your husband. Problem is you love yourself more than you love him and are prone to the attention from him and soon to be others. You must see a therapist and discovery your why's, or else he'll be the first of a few affairs. You have to ask yourself how can you stand to be with a man who disrespects her husband. Of course, the next question is how can you not only allow it, but facilitate the disrespect. Remember, he's the guy you said, "Can’t live without him at all! He’s everything I’ve wanted". Melanie. This is ugly stuff here. Real ugly. Your issues and challenges are much deeper than you know. Edited November 23, 2018 by Colin Grant 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted November 23, 2018 Share Posted November 23, 2018 Dangerous affair There's safe affairs? Since these are brothers, I'd guess any secrecy will be sort-lived. Plan accordingly... Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted November 24, 2018 Share Posted November 24, 2018 You feel bad for your husband - sometimes, but not all the time. Was I wonder how you will feel when they have a few too many one night and his brother tells your husband what happened in Ibiza... It’s probably only a matter of time until the truth comes out - especially if you are still flirting. If you were a woman of integrity, you would tell your husband the truth so that at least he hears it from you... All decisions have consequences, I think you are about to learn that lesson the hard way... Link to post Share on other sites
usa1ah Posted November 25, 2018 Share Posted November 25, 2018 (edited) No you don’t love your husband. Not really. Your poor husband, he deserves someone better then you. With his own brother. You need to let your husband **** his brother’s wife now. Edited November 25, 2018 by usa1ah Link to post Share on other sites
Arun10 Posted November 25, 2018 Share Posted November 25, 2018 You need to slap yourself and tell him the truth. I have recently just told my wife the truth about my affair and even though it was the hardest thing ever we are trying to work through things and I do not know how it will end up but its in the open now so what is meant to be is meant to be. As the relationship - brothers! - is so close, the clock is ticking. If you can get it off against a wall so easily with his brother, you need to re-evaluate your life choices. Link to post Share on other sites
Jamess1 Posted November 25, 2018 Share Posted November 25, 2018 Hi Didn’t really know who to turn to but I must explain my situation! I’m married for 5 years and I love my husband. Can’t live without him at all! He’s everything I’ve wanted - good job, personality everything. He has a brother - he’s just got married and we’d have a good relationship. His wife is one of my close friends! Me and my husbands brother sometimes have this flirting thing. He is attractive and buff but we don’t act. In August I was in Ibiza on a hen, husbands brother we will call him Chris for now was in ibiza for someone’s stag. We bumped into each other several times and at a pool party it got quite flirtatious. We’ve al been drinking etc. That night we went to a club he was there with his mates and again still drinking it just got quite heated and flirty. We went outside and he was massively flirting. I told him I know he can’t keep his eyes pff me and he pushed me against a wall and first I thought he was angry. I then figured out he couldn’t hold his emotions. Told him we would regret it and he asked me if I was going to stop him and I didn’t respond. Next thing he f**** me against the wall and r was amazing. We spent the rest of trip flirting. Came back and he lives his life I live mine. We sometimes have flirty moments but nothing else. We don’t even talk about the incident. I feel bad for my husband though. I love my husband so much - but I feel bad sometimes (not all the time). Any thoughts or similar situations? Sexy bad boys - alpha fccks....boring reliable husband-beta bucks. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
misspalmy Posted November 28, 2018 Share Posted November 28, 2018 I have kids to one brother and son and another on way with another. i was not married to any tho your going to really hurt your hustand i know this cos my girls dad was hurt and i wasnt even with him.. Link to post Share on other sites
DKT3 Posted November 28, 2018 Share Posted November 28, 2018 I believe OP has left the building Link to post Share on other sites
diddilybop Posted December 3, 2018 Share Posted December 3, 2018 sounds like you're more worried about getting caught. "i couldn't help myself", really? i don't think you really love your husband as much as you claim you do. also, way to seriously disrespect your sister-in-law too. tell him the truth and if he wants to get a divorce, respect his choice. he deserves way better, you could at least give him that. Link to post Share on other sites
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