LoveNoLoss Posted July 8, 2005 Share Posted July 8, 2005 My husband and I have been separated for a year now. He had 7 affairs during our marriage (don't know why yet except he says it was low self esteem) as he was always on the road with a band. I had one affair which I believe was because I lost trust early in our marriage (caught him twice in EA with the same woman) and the fact I believe he loved that band more than me for the most part. Anyway, when I see him... it's almost like he could be my brother! I HAVE NO physical attraction to him whatsoever. If we were to get back together, how does one get this back? When we first met, he wasn't "my type" so to speak but once we got into our relationship, he became attractive to me physically. Anyway, why does this go away? Also, can one get this back even though all I see is sleezy women when I look at him? Does this make sense? Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
WoodenHorsey Posted July 10, 2005 Share Posted July 10, 2005 I think you can get it back. I think your love and sexual attraction for hubby are buried underneath all the betrayal and hurt. I read somewhere someone compared love and the affair and everything to an building that falls in an earthquake. That your heart and trust were on the first floor and then the affair was the earthquake that destroyed the building and buried your heart. Maybe it's dead underneath the bricks but maybe its still alive, sounds like in your case its probably still alive. So now if you decide to rebuild your marriage you have to take the pile of bricks apart and uncover the love again. I think love and sexual feeling for married couples is more about trust and love than it is about actually thinking hubby is hot You even said that he wasn't really your type, so when did you start feeling sexual towards him? Probably once you started to love and trust him. Once you can get the trust back you should get the sexual feeling back too. Link to post Share on other sites
stressedout58 Posted July 10, 2005 Share Posted July 10, 2005 Can one get physical attraction back? Possibly, but if you are still involved with the OM, then the chances of that happening are the same as a snowball's chance in hell. Anymore questions? Link to post Share on other sites
Author LoveNoLoss Posted July 11, 2005 Author Share Posted July 11, 2005 I do have a question... why don't you register? Link to post Share on other sites
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