LoveShack.org Community Forums

Reload this Page LoveShack.org Community Forums > Romantic > Marriage & Life Partnerships > Infidelity

Wife Is in Love with Her boss- I can't process it


Infidelity In an affair or suspect your significant other? Share your experiences and concerns here.

Like Tree153Likes
 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 1st March 2018, 4:50 PM   #46
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 39
Quote:
Originally Posted by BluesPower View Post
OMG... You need to get to a therapist really quickly. My friend you are completely and totally delusional and in complete denial.

She has been sleeping around on you since before you got married.

Adults that are in "love", which is this case it means that she loves to f*** him, do not go on business trips and not have sex. They are having sex in his office.

You have got to wake up.

She does not love you. She does not want you. She does not want to have sex with you. She does not respect you.

DO YOU UNDERSTAND????



You need to pack her stuff. Put it out on the porch. Change the locks. Call he OM's wife and explain that you just kicked your wife out and she has been having an affair with her husband.

WAKE THE HELL UP!!!!
Btw she was the child, not you.

But I hear you, and i will get help I just don't know why she would lie about that when it's already over. Plus he has a little baby. That be some next level demon ****.
b2121 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st March 2018, 4:53 PM   #47
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 39
I'll ask you and the group here, you really think it's ok to message the wife?

I know you think they are ****ing, but if they aren't i just ruined a familly life because my wife is a selfish child. I feel like that's crossing a line no?
b2121 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st March 2018, 5:07 PM   #48
Established Member
 
BluesPower's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2016
Posts: 2,983
I give up...

Quote:
Originally Posted by b2121 View Post
I'll ask you and the group here, you really think it's ok to message the wife?

I know you think they are ****ing, but if they aren't i just ruined a familly life because my wife is a selfish child. I feel like that's crossing a line no?
I give up... someone please try to help this guy.
BluesPower is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 1st March 2018, 5:23 PM   #49
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 39
I hear you on everything i really do. My point is my wife is the issue. She can be dead to me. I am just asking the question, will it not ruin this other family? I am already ****ed, I am just trying to think of a one year old child here.
b2121 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st March 2018, 5:29 PM   #50
Established Member
 
BluesPower's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2016
Posts: 2,983
You need to admit...

Quote:
Originally Posted by b2121 View Post
I hear you on everything i really do. My point is my wife is the issue. She can be dead to me. I am just asking the question, will it not ruin this other family? I am already ****ed, I am just trying to think of a one year old child here.
You need to admit... to yourself that your wife has huge issues.

You need to admit that she has been sleeping not only with her boss but several other men as well through the course of your marriage.

Their is no other reasonable explanation.

Yes you need to tell his wife. For several reason: she deserves to know that she is married to a creep.

It will most likely blow up the affair at least for a while, why should you be the only one to suffer.

You need to move her stuff out of your apartment and file for divorce. She has been using you for your entire marriage.

It is time to face reality and move on with your life...
BluesPower is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 1st March 2018, 5:30 PM   #51
Established Member
 
GorillaTheater's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 9,659
Quote:
Originally Posted by b2121 View Post
I hear you on everything i really do. My point is my wife is the issue. She can be dead to me. I am just asking the question, will it not ruin this other family? I am already ****ed, I am just trying to think of a one year old child here.

You won't be blowing up that family, the OM already did that. All your doing is letting her know who she's married to so that she can make some informed decisions in her life. She should have that right, right?
GorillaTheater is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st March 2018, 5:31 PM   #52
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 39
So send her a FB message? And if you don't mind, what would you literally say?
b2121 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st March 2018, 6:55 PM   #53
Established Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 11,034
Quote:
Originally Posted by b2121 View Post
And if you don't mind, what would you literally say?
I'd start with the truth. Trust me, in these cases that will give his BS plenty to think about...

Mr. Lucky
__________________
"Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for." - Epicurus
Mr. Lucky is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st March 2018, 7:09 PM   #54
Established Member
 
aliveagain's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Just East of the Rockies
Posts: 3,207
Quote:
Originally Posted by b2121 View Post
I'll ask you and the group here, you really think it's ok to message the wife?

I know you think they are ****ing, but if they aren't i just ruined a familly life because my wife is a selfish child. I feel like that's crossing a line no?
I don't know of any women that would be willing to loose their marriage on a maybe, something is going on. The least is an emotional affair. When a grown woman spends a night at another man's home it isn't because she forgot how to call her husband to come pick her up. Decide if her job or your marriage is more important to you then act on it. Exposure kills affairs. Her boss will throw her under the bus in a micro second to save his a$$ from a very costly divorce. You can't keep going through the same sh*t with her expecting different results. If doing nothing didn't work before it isn't going to work now.

Why do you want to keep taking someone back that continuously hurts you? Time to try something new, tell her dad to come and get her because you refuse to be married to someone that is in love with another man. No further explanation is necessary, he's an adult and understands what that means. Why are you giving her so much control of what happens to you in your life when you know she has no respect for you? Give her back your wedding ring, it's tainted with the stench of her infidelity.
aliveagain is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st March 2018, 7:19 PM   #55
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 39
i hear you loud and clear, it's just hard to come to terms with. I am going to tell her she is not permitted to stay at the apartment today and she can pick her things up saturday while i am away with the dog.

I was supposed to go to counseling with her next wed. Should I cancel that?
b2121 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st March 2018, 7:39 PM   #56
Established Member
 
aliveagain's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Just East of the Rockies
Posts: 3,207
Quote:
Originally Posted by b2121 View Post
i hear you loud and clear, it's just hard to come to terms with. I am going to tell her she is not permitted to stay at the apartment today and she can pick her things up saturday while i am away with the dog.

I was supposed to go to counseling with her next wed. Should I cancel that?
Counselling is useless if she is in an affair. Counselling only works if your both committed to the marriage, she has made it very clear that she is not. Women that respect their husbands don't treat their husbands the way she is treating you. Best friends do not treat their friends the way she is treating you. The only way a marriage works is if your both invested in it equally. Your hardly over the honeymoon and she's already been in love with a couple of guys. Why stay married to someone that is trying to find a replacement for you? You didn't marry her part time so don't let her treat you that way, Your too worried about loosing her and all she has done is shown you she is already gone. Don't devalue yourself because she will do to you what you allow her to do. Each time she sinks your relationship to a new low that becomes your new standard. She's just not meeting your standards my friend(she's not even trying) so get rid of her.
aliveagain is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st March 2018, 7:44 PM   #57
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 39
I just have this fear that I am never going to find someone as pretty or smart etc. It's irrational-I am attractive, smart, successful but being with her since i was basically a kid i don't even know how dating works. I know that's thinking a bit ahead but like, ****ing tinder and ****? Makes me so depressed.
b2121 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st March 2018, 8:29 PM   #58
Established Member
 
BluesPower's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2016
Posts: 2,983
You know what...

Quote:
Originally Posted by b2121 View Post
I just have this fear that I am never going to find someone as pretty or smart etc. It's irrational-I am attractive, smart, successful but being with her since i was basically a kid i don't even know how dating works. I know that's thinking a bit ahead but like, ****ing tinder and ****? Makes me so depressed.
You know what... when you heal from this. And get your self confidence back, and start feeling like a man, you will be amazed at the number of women just like you described will be out there.

And those women, will not be a serial cheater that sleeps around on you with multiple men.

You just have to get through this, the rest will work out...
BluesPower is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 1st March 2018, 8:48 PM   #59
Established Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 314
As long as you keep showing her that you're not worthy of respect, she'll believe you. She won't respect you and won't be attracted to you as a man. The way to get your wife back is to start divorce proceedings, ironically. It might not work--she might go through with the divorce. You just have to be prepared for that.

You need to inform the man's wife. She has a right to know. At this point he'll dump your wife and she'll be facing a life without you and without him. This might finally make her see the light and work towards winning you back. You'll have to decide whether you're her second choice, and whether you're willing to live that way.
WilyWill is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 1st March 2018, 9:05 PM   #60
Established Member
 
wmacbride's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 3,333
Quote:
Originally Posted by b2121 View Post
I just have this fear that I am never going to find someone as pretty or smart etc. It's irrational-I am attractive, smart, successful but being with her since i was basically a kid i don't even know how dating works. I know that's thinking a bit ahead but like, ****ing tinder and ****? Makes me so depressed.
Bud,

There is a song lyric that goes " she ain't pretty, she just looks that way". That describes your wife.

This is a woman who is sleeping around behind your back and then exposing you to a plethora of diseases ( and no, condoms don't protect you from everything) without so much as a care in the world. She cares about your mental health? My ass she cares about that. If she did, she would have the decency to walk away, yet she would rather stay, expose you to potentially god knows what both physically and mentally because it gives her the jollies to think she can have you and the guys on the side too?

I hate to say this or even think it about another person, but I really believe she gets off on sneaking behind your back, and even more so on the idea that she is hurting you. It probably makes her feel powerful. Don't give her that.

Hold you head up high, keep your dignity and walk away. I know that's a really hard thing to ask of you, as you love her, but she clearly does not love you.

Don't fall into the trap of thinking she is irreplaceable. There are lots of women out there who are loving, kind, loyal and pretty both inside and out. They would be willing to make a guy like you their whole world and give you so much happiness that you'll be smiling every day. A true partner in every sense of the word.

In fact, ( and please forgive me BP for using you as an example) if I remember correctly, Blues Power was able to walk away from a terrible relationship. He now has a girlfriend whom, from what I can tell, he thinks the world of and who makes him really happy.

You can have that too, but first, you need to put the work in and get out of this crappy relationship. Your spouse is broken inside...and you can't fix her. No one can but her, and she isn't interested in doing that.
__________________
"“there’s no better system than our own morality, not law, not science, not religion… just decency.”-R.M.
wmacbride is offline   Reply With Quote
 

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

 

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Did she or not? Wife and her Boss VerusSS Cheating, Flirting, and Jealousy 23 19th July 2015 12:36 PM
Wife Overcomplicating Divorce Process jdubbish Separation and Divorce 11 23rd May 2013 9:28 AM
My wife and her boss 0plus2is1 Infidelity 40 24th June 2008 9:25 AM
!! His Ex-wife's The Boss! HeartDM66 Dating 0 27th August 2006 7:19 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 4:51 AM.

Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.


Copyright © 1997-2018 LoveShack.org. All Rights Reserved.