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I think my Dad is Cheating On My Mom? What do You Think?


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ABUSCH2005

I have know Idea who to talk to about this without someone knowing that it about my life so I putting it out there here in hopes for some advice.

I suspect that my father is cheating on my mother what do I do?

I know in the past i have always felt he has possibly cheated on her and now once again the evidence is being thrown in my face. Let me start by saying that my parents have had rough spots in there relationship but I have always felt they have been somewhat happy. My mom has a sucessful company in which she owns and runs and my father is a computer analysist or something like that. He travels almost 5 days a week for his job. Which is nothing surprising because for his job for this company he does have to travel a few days a week if not 5 days a week. I have in the past thought he might be cheating but it has always been in the rough spots of my parents relationship and recently everything has been great and I havent suspected a thing. But today for some reason I walked in my parents room and saw my dads suitcase sitting on the bed from when he had unpacked it this morning. why I dont know but something urged me to look in his bathroom accessories bag. in the pocket on the inside I found a condom. this might not seem unusal except for the fact that my mother had a historectemy like 8 years ago and they in no way need a condom. So of course I begin to think well he must need it for someone else. What do think? Is he cheating? or am I just worrying for nothing? Please Help!

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bluechocolate

Evidence is being thrown in your face?

 

You went into your father's suitcase & looked into his toiletrie bag because something urged you to look in the inside pocket. This is hardly having something thrown in your face. What exactly was it that you were looking for?

 

Now you suspect something even though you say your parents are getting along fine.

 

You can't know everything that is going on between your mother & father & you can't know what other uses he, or they, may have for that condom (though I will grant you that it is suspicious). Then again, why would he just leave something like that in his toiletrie bag? Your mother could just as easily have found it. They've had problems in the past so it's possible that your mother knows, or knew, of infidelity on his part. Who knows? Maybe they've decided to lead their own lives & have found that they are happy with that arrangement. And it is possible that condom has been around for a while.

 

I guess now that you've found this condom you can't forget it but that is exactly what I will urge you to do. And in the future think twice before snooping through your parents things because firstly it is not your place to be doing that & secondly, as you've discovered, you never know what you may find.

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This is a very tough and painful situation. I don't know how old you are, or whether you are afraid of seeing your home broken up. I do have just three points to make to you:

 

* Condoms are not used just for contraception - they can be used on vibrators or for cleanliness during anal sex, or for disease prevention. There are several scenarios whereby your dad has not been either cheating or contemplating cheating. Perhaps your mom suggested the use of condoms to prevent transmitting a non-STD vaginal condition she is experiencing

 

* It is by no means clear whether blowing the whistle or keeping silent about possible cheating improves the chance of your parents staying together

 

* The only two people who know what is REALLY going on in that marriage are your mom and your dad. And they are also the ONLY two who have responsibility for keeping it going

 

My recommendation: Stay out of your parents' toiletries, bedroom, suitcases, bathrrom drawers, etc. You'll be less likely to find things that trouble you.

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