Fabian Montenegro Posted November 19, 2011 Share Posted November 19, 2011 (edited) My wife and I first met at a business course in 1998. She was separated from her second husband. I was already divorced from my first wife. Both of us have quite a bit of experience in the marriage game. We married soon after. Our lives faced many complications. We both have to take care of her autistic son from her second marriage. His father never visits. In 2005 she suffered from a miscarriage, and this drove her into a deep depression. In 2008 I found out that my father was diagnosed with lung cancer, and he passed away a year later. Last year my wife's sister was involved in a motor cycle accident which shattered her left hip. So it has been an eventful few years. These events have helped to shape our marriage. And now, I have found out that for the past two years, my wife and my brother Esteban (both of whom I trusted so much) have had a secret love affair. They've been going on business trips together and I suspected nothing. I am broken. What can I do? Edited November 19, 2011 by Fabian Montenegro Link to post Share on other sites
despicableME Posted November 19, 2011 Share Posted November 19, 2011 They've been going on business trips together and I suspected nothing. I don't want to seem insensitive, but what's all this about??? This should've been a Red Flag. Link to post Share on other sites
Universe Posted November 19, 2011 Share Posted November 19, 2011 Weather the storm, friend. Focus on healing yourself. Get away from your wife if you can. Get away from your brother. Take care of yourself. Work out. Eat right. Weather the storm. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Fabian Montenegro Posted November 19, 2011 Author Share Posted November 19, 2011 I don't want to seem insensitive, but what's all this about??? This should've been a Red Flag. When they went on their business trips, I expected them to be working on business of the non-sexual and non-romantic kind. Weather the storm, friend. Focus on healing yourself. Get away from your wife if you can. Get away from your brother. Take care of yourself. Work out. Eat right. Weather the storm. Good luck. Thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted November 19, 2011 Share Posted November 19, 2011 I am so sorry for you. Your wife and brother are a real piece of work. See an attorney for your options and get tested for STD's. Your wife by her actions shows that she has no respect for you and your marriage and has played you for a fool for years. If you do not respect yourself then who will? Please divorce her and do not reward her for her behavior by staying with her. If your brother is married or has a girlfriend then please expose this to them. Nobody deserves what your wife and brother did to you. It is such a double betrayal on so many levels. See an attorney on Monday. How could your wife justify such behavior? Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted November 19, 2011 Share Posted November 19, 2011 Your wife is a slut and your brother is a ho. How dare they. I hope you are going to file for divorce as I don't see any other way out of this than to leave them both. Maybe he would like to take care of her autistic son. Link to post Share on other sites
beforedawn Posted November 20, 2011 Share Posted November 20, 2011 Well I am sorry that this happened to you, but now you are on LS asking for advise????? Here is some advise for you, Just remember that you respect your brother and " He respects you " just remember that you Love your wife and "she Loves you " So because these events have happened over this amount of time, you just give your brother and your wife a big hug and tell them that " YOUR sorry " for doing this to them and " YOU " will try to be a better husband and brother and THEY WILL UNDERSTAND... After that being said.....Bury your head in the sand as deep as you can and after many, many years pass......EVERYTHING WILL BE RIGHT AS RAIN Link to post Share on other sites
Author Fabian Montenegro Posted November 20, 2011 Author Share Posted November 20, 2011 "My heart. It-a-burns for you Rocheeeeele!" Link to post Share on other sites
Severely Unamused Posted November 20, 2011 Share Posted November 20, 2011 "My heart. It-a-burns for you Rocheeeeele!" Hmmmm..... Link to post Share on other sites
sadcalifornian Posted November 20, 2011 Share Posted November 20, 2011 First of all, is A over? The pre-requiste of reconciliation is NC. If the A is not over, in other words W chooses your brother, you may have not choice but to D her, no? If she is remorseful and willing to go NC with your brother, then the ball is in your court to decide whether to R or D. In this case, the OM is your own brother, so NC means no more family reunion or any activity or meeting where your brother may participate. This makes R very difficult. If you feel this marriage is not worth much in your mind, D may be easier for you. Also, you two do not have your own kids? But, she has an autistic kid from her previous marriage? You are already sacrificing alot for her, and she has betrayed you in the worst manner possible. With your brother ! She made a selfish choice to appease her own needs, and now it is your turn to make a very selfish choice. You have to see where you stand, what you will gain and what you will lose. You must make a decision based on what you need and want. Do not think about her or her kids. Think only about you. What do you want? You bringing up the misfortunes that predated her A means that you are trying to find excuses for her, but nothing will justify her indescretion. You do not jump into bed with H's brother for 2 years by accident or by mistake. This is who she truly is. The reason I react a bit harsh is also due to the fact this is her 3rd marriage. I don't mean to be biased but 3rd marriage with infidelity speak volume on some kind of character flaw she has. How did her two previous marriages end? Was there any infidelity involved? Why did those marriages fail? If you were my cousin and you do not have any kids from this marriage, my recommendation to my cousin would be divorce her. But then again, you are not me and you are not my cousin either. Think carefully and make a decision. With decision, you must take appropriate actions. Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Marvellous Posted November 20, 2011 Share Posted November 20, 2011 Spend time away from them, so you can sort out your feelings, before talking to them (if you want).The time will come when it won't hurt as much as it does now. Maybe the memories will never go away completely, but at least, you can heal. Link to post Share on other sites
Darren Steez Posted November 20, 2011 Share Posted November 20, 2011 If broken, pull yourself together and stop being a troll :0 Do you have a cousin named Juan Luis Sanchez Link to post Share on other sites
Author Fabian Montenegro Posted November 20, 2011 Author Share Posted November 20, 2011 If broken, pull yourself together and stop being a troll :0 Do you have a cousin named Juan Luis Sanchez What do you mean? I am no troll. You are the troll. I must be away from my wife. It is the only way to clear my head. Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted November 21, 2011 Share Posted November 21, 2011 Is your brother married or have a girlfriend. You need to expose this to them and your family. You need to see an attorney at once to understand your options. This is beyond unacceptable. Move on and save yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Fabian Montenegro Posted November 21, 2011 Author Share Posted November 21, 2011 Is your brother married or have a girlfriend. You need to expose this to them and your family. You need to see an attorney at once to understand your options. This is beyond unacceptable. Move on and save yourself. My brother is married. I shall have vengeance. Link to post Share on other sites
bentnotbroken Posted November 21, 2011 Share Posted November 21, 2011 This writing style seems veerrrryyyy familiar. It usually only takes a few posts for the real person to appear. Link to post Share on other sites
Severely Unamused Posted November 21, 2011 Share Posted November 21, 2011 (edited) This writing style seems veerrrryyyy familiar. It usually only takes a few posts for the real person to appear. I was rather enjoying this. I must admit that the idea of an affair occurring with a family member is about as unpleasant as you can get. Edited November 21, 2011 by Severely Unamused Link to post Share on other sites
Author Fabian Montenegro Posted November 21, 2011 Author Share Posted November 21, 2011 This writing style seems veerrrryyyy familiar It should. You have been reading my story. Why would my writing style change in the middle of it? Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted November 21, 2011 Share Posted November 21, 2011 Have you exposed to your brother's wife? What makes your wife think that you would want to stay with her after this? Have you contacted an attorney? What possible excuses has your wife given you? Why have you not kicked out already? You don't deserve this. I wish you luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted November 21, 2011 Share Posted November 21, 2011 Sorry, I'm thinking troll. No back story at all...nothing to go on. Just, " My wife has been sleeping with my brother. Your thoughts?" Nothing on the discovery, nothing on the confrontation. Nothing on their reaction. Nothing on where this person is currently at with his state of mind. Nothing on current course of action....nothing, Link to post Share on other sites
Author Fabian Montenegro Posted November 21, 2011 Author Share Posted November 21, 2011 Have you exposed to your brother's wife? What makes your wife think that you would want to stay with her after this? Have you contacted an attorney? What possible excuses has your wife given you? Why have you not kicked out already? You don't deserve this. I wish you luck. I have prepared to leave and build a new future. Now I am thinking of a way to hurt both my brother and wife in the most heinous way possible. I will tell my brother's wife only then. Link to post Share on other sites
wezol Posted November 21, 2011 Share Posted November 21, 2011 I have prepared to leave and build a new future. Now I am thinking of a way to hurt both my brother and wife in the most heinous way possible. I will tell my brother's wife only then. Here's something for you to much on, troll. You're brother, quiet simply, has a bigger d*ck. His name is Esteban and yours is Fabian, he obviously has more mystique and therefore makes your wife all wet and horny. Maybe one day you'll grow up. Link to post Share on other sites
nofool4u Posted November 21, 2011 Share Posted November 21, 2011 I am broken. What can I do? Divorce your wife, and disown your brother. Expose what your brother did to the family and let them all know if he is at family functions, you are not. Link to post Share on other sites
eamherst14051 Posted November 21, 2011 Share Posted November 21, 2011 this wil help you bcause when i brokin i bank rupt. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Fabian Montenegro Posted November 22, 2011 Author Share Posted November 22, 2011 Divorce your wife, and disown your brother. Expose what your brother did to the family and let them all know if he is at family functions, you are not. That is what I will do. Link to post Share on other sites
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