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Does separation make a difference?


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I've been seeing this man for about four months now, but not on quite the serious level because I left the country for a while and also because I wasn't looking for anything serious, either. But since I've been back we've stared spending more time together and I really enjoy his company. The problem is that last night he sat me down and told me this intense story about his life.

 

This it quite complicated but I'll simplify it somewhat. He's Canadian...but on an exchange several years ago he met, married, and moved to be with a Mexican girl. Apparently they had a very bad realtionship as her family was very rich and powerful and controlled him with their money...and she was more of the "kept woman" type while he was looking for a business and romantic partner. He was miserable and told his wife he wanted to come home, but she refused to come with him. Then she got pregnant. He said he still wanted to leave, but she refused to come with him, still. Needless to say he left Mexico, his business, thousands of dollars...everything behind and came home to only his family. This was a year and a half ago and he hasn't heard from, seen, or spoken to his wife or daughter since. He's also still married because his fanancial status is preventing his from getting a divorce.

 

So, am I completely crazy for getting involved with this guy? I have to respect his honesty because neither of us is looking for marriage anytime soon. But, I'm afraid of getting in too deep emotionally, as I'm sure he is, as he's told me. But, I can feel that it could lead to a relationship with time, if it hasn't already. Any suggestions?

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the story your friend shared with you has several things you need to be aware of....

 

Number one, has he initiated any divorce proceedings from his end? I believe he can do that without having to go to Mexico. If he has NOT, you need to be wary. It doesn't take that much money to at least START the proceedings.

 

Number 2: He left without any type of formal visitation agreement to see his only daughter. I don't care wht the circumstance is, but it seems like he just abandoned her. With only his own good in mind.

 

Number 3: Why did he marry someone he didn't love. Marriage is hard enough without marrying without love.

 

There are several serious things to be aware of here. I think your heart may end up broken. If marriage is absolutely 100% something you are not interested in then fine, but if you think that in two or three years you may want to be married, watch out.

 

One more thing.... every story has two sides. You have only heard ONE side. A lot of people seem NICE and trustworthy on the outside.

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