Guest Posted April 2, 2006 Share Posted April 2, 2006 I have been with my love for 5 months now. We communicate well, it does not matter what the issue is, we can talk about it. He is everything I have ever hoped for. We are so happy together. I can not see my life without him. He makes me so happy. I see that we will be married in the future, but is 5 months to short of a time for marriage? Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted April 2, 2006 Share Posted April 2, 2006 I have been with my love for 5 months now. We communicate well, it does not matter what the issue is, we can talk about it. He is everything I have ever hoped for. We are so happy together. I can not see my life without him. He makes me so happy. I see that we will be married in the future, but is 5 months to short of a time for marriage? Thanks I think your ages matter more than the timeframe here. My husband and I knew after 4 months that we were meant to be and became engaged, BUT we were in our 30's and had been through one marriage already. We were mature. We knew what we wanted and didn't want. So I think your experience/age matters more than the actual amount of time that you know each other. Of course there are exceptions as well as other factors but for the most part I believe this to be true. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted April 2, 2006 Share Posted April 2, 2006 There is no need to rush. 5 months isn't long enough to find out if he has serious flaws. He may not and you may be lucky but a lot of people who rushed into relationships being 'POSITIVE IT WAS RIGHT' found out it wasn't right at all. For some reason, people for whom relationships like this work out seem to think that the ones that don't had people who didn't believe IT WAS RIGHT. They did. We all think it's right and perfect bla bla bla at the beginning. Sometimes (rarely) we're right and it remains positive and perfect. Most of the time, we eventually find out we were wrong. Give it at least a year and try to live together for six months. If you love living together, then it's time to consider marriage. Waiting a year will save you making a big mistake - and if you love each other, a year's nothing to wait. Link to post Share on other sites
km Posted April 2, 2006 Share Posted April 2, 2006 IMHO, no matter your ages, 5 months is too fast. If it's love, it'll last. What's the rush? Link to post Share on other sites
dgiirl Posted April 2, 2006 Share Posted April 2, 2006 Personally, I think it's too soon. After all, if you want to get a wedding dress, all the stores up here want atleast a 6 months advanced notice. So if they want 6 months for a dress, surely you should wait a little longer to get married lol Why not live together first? Link to post Share on other sites
twistarzgymnast Posted April 2, 2006 Share Posted April 2, 2006 I think it is too soon but if you and him have devoloped a great sense of trust and love i see no problem! Are you guyz engaged yet or just dating if you are just dating i reccommend atleast a year and if you are engaged i reccommend 1 year to a year and a half! if you guyz really have a love connection he will stay with you through 2- 2 1/2 years. Good Luck TwistGymnast:) Link to post Share on other sites
Lennox Posted April 3, 2006 Share Posted April 3, 2006 Im in the group that says it's too soon. I think that you probably know that you'll be together for a long time, hopefully forever. When it's right, it's right and nothing can change that. One thing that will change is the dynamics of your relationship. Right now, you're in the honeymoon phase when everything just feels so right and perfect. I'm not going to argue with you, it probably is! Enjoy it as long as you can because the time will come that something you find truly endearing about him right now will become a little annoying later. Nothing wrong with that, it happens to everyone. Start arranging your building blocks now with the long term in mind as you do. Take plenty of time and talk to each other about how you are going to mesh your family values, your religious views, your views on how children should be raised, who will earn the money, how the money will be earned, how you are going to plan your retirement together, etc etc up to life insurance and funeral arrangements! Probably sounds silly right now, but your ability to work through those life issues now will be good practice on how you're going to work hard at keeping your marriage and family together...and don't let anyone fool you, it's HARD WORK! Satisfying work, but it's hard too. Allow yourselves time together as singles to find out how you both handle disagreements and heated emotional arguments. If you find difficulty in handling arguments, be proactive and decide NOW how you'll handle them later after you're married. I would also advocate pre-marital counseling. There's a lot that you can sort out now before you take the big plunge through it. There's probably no better feeling that you're going to have than walking down that aisle confident that you are meshed well enough and on most levels with the man that you're going to marry. Don't be afraid to put your relationship to these tests. I think you guys will do just fine and you'll be better off for it in the long run. Link to post Share on other sites
JayKay Posted April 3, 2006 Share Posted April 3, 2006 I don't think people should get married until they've been together AT LEAST a year, and even that is pretty fast. You are still in the early 'flush' of romance. That part wears off and then you have to deal with the reality of living with another human being. Try googling 'stages of a relationship' and familiarize yourself with some of the predictable stages men and women go through as their relationship deepens and develops. Sooner or later, there will be conflict and challenge. It's important to know how to deal with these. Link to post Share on other sites
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