xXSURFAGEXx Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 Ok I have a wife and 3 kids,a 11 year old boy,a 9 year old girl and a baby boy(11 months old.).I own a house,it costed me all of my money for my own art gears(I'm really intrested in art.).I found my wife in college,she was in the art major(Same as me!).After we graduated that's when we got engaged...Then we got married and well,I told you what I had.Ok my story begins here... Before when we bought our house,we had a 3 year old boy.He's always making me mad.Right after we closed our door,our annoying neighbour knock on the door and sang a well let's call it a corny song.My wife was preganent at that time so we needed a big house.We had a backyard,you could fit a big swimming pool in it!I had my BBQ pit.I do all the cooking and such and such.My wife just rests in bed.This house has 6 rooms!Very roomy!1 basment,3 toilets(1 in my bedroom,one upstairs and one downstairs.).1 kitchen and it's also big.My friends are all so jealous of my house they try to come over everyday,but I said only on saturdays and sunday.I work at a art industry,lucky I found it!I'm a great artist,I make about $9000 each month.I'm also good at cooking(I can make a Baked Alaska!).So then my wife had our girl and then our baby boy.I think we're very happy here.So is it good or bad? Link to post Share on other sites
megabit15 Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 I'm not sure why your are questioning the state of your marriage since you said that you both feel happy. (?) Link to post Share on other sites
gilbert Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 I'm so proud of you for doing all you do for your family. Sounds like you work really hard. It's also nice to hear that you are so understanding of your wife. I'm sure you are writing because your wife is not doing much lately with this new house. But as you wrote, she just had a baby. That's also really hard work. Give it some time, I'm sure she will get excited about the house after the newness of the baby wears off. Don't get to mad at your 3 yr. old, he will one day be the apple of your eye. My son is 17 and the world to me. We have two girls and one boy. That makes him even more special. I think you have a very good marriage. I know it's hard feeling like you are doing all the work but love your family, the kids won't be small forever. They grow up and leave. So enjoy! Link to post Share on other sites
Neptune Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 I suspect what you are getting at here is you are a nice guy. So, there may be some of the nice guy syndrome going on with you. That means that for all the nice things you do , you still somehow feel unfulfilled. The nice guy syndrome assumes that if you do all the right things you will be happy. but, somehow you are not happy. Is that the point? Link to post Share on other sites
d'Arthez Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 And I am not sure why you ask about the state of your marriage, as you were interested in a girl, and had a friend who felt the same about her - but blew it. I can assume though. Link to post Share on other sites
Sheba Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 I know that you are the 11 year old boy, and I believe you once were the three your old that your dad was mad at. I am sorry that you feel your dad is mad at you all the time. I am sure he loves you even if it feels as if he is mad at you all the time. I get mad at my children but I still love them more than anything, every single minute of every single day. Do you think your dad's marriage is bad? Making lots of money makes life easier, but it is not everything. Is it ok if his wife is resting in bed all the time? Is she sick, or does she work really hard? Maybe your dad likes to take care of everything himself? If you ask real questions instead of pretending to be an adult, you might get some very good advice from all the wise people that visit this site. Link to post Share on other sites
StacyRose Posted October 18, 2005 Share Posted October 18, 2005 this post makes no sense.. Link to post Share on other sites
JayKay Posted October 18, 2005 Share Posted October 18, 2005 It sounds to me like you have an ideal life on the outside. Perhaps something is missing on the inside. Perhaps you are missing some emotional component you long for. Many people go through this; they strive for the successful career, the big house, the wife and kids....yet still find they are unsatisfied in some way. I believe that's why you're asking the question, "Is this marriage good or bad?" The state of being 'good' or 'bad' is not based on what you do or what you own. It's based on your peace of mind or lack thereof. Some people find themselves feeling disllusioned because the stress of paying bills, taking care of kids and day to day life removes a lot of the mystery and romance from life. The 'perfect' life we envisioned isn't so perfect close up, once we realize how hard it can be. Sounds like you and your wife need a little getaway. If you are making good money, cut back on work a little and reconnect with your family. Have someone's parents watch your kids for a weekend and go somewhere with your wife to reconnect as lovers, not just parents. If you find your kids annoying, spend a little one-on-one time with each one. Take your older child to a kids' museum, or take the younger one the park. Kids love to spend a little special private time with a parent and it will help you see the child as a person, not just a needy, demanding creature. If you are feeling the pressures of having to provide a certain lifestyle, see where you can cut back. Many artists, when they become commercially successful, feeel that they have less time for personal, creative projects. Maybe you'd like to do an art project that doesn't garner a lot of money but that is emotionally meaningful to you. True happiness comes from within, not without. Nobody can answer your questions about marriage except you. Link to post Share on other sites
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