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Hopelessly Horny Wife


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At 46 y/o, three kids, and 18 years of marriage I am hornier than ever! Well, that might be an exaggeration, when I was younger I was in a constant state of being horny... now it's certain times of the month that I am raging horny. I can't focus, I'm flushed, soaking through my panties, have trouble sleeping. I have to masturbate before I leave the house because I am afraid I'll pounce on the first guy that smiles at me, haha. My husband and I have a decent sex life, but after almost 20 years it less than fully satisfying...thank God for toys!! haha

 

Any other women my age experience this? Usually I hear it the other way around, where the husband is always horny and the wife is not. I have a friend that complains that her husband wants sex way more than she does and it annoys her. In the back of my head I was thinking 'maybe I should hang out with your husband more.' lol

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Maybe a pre-menopausal hormone issue. You typically hear of it the other way around, that women lose all desire, but it's very possible for things to swing the other way.

 

Once you go through menopause things should even out. You'll likely still have a high sex drive (if you always have) but it won't be as unmanageable as it sounds right now.

 

Stay away from other men and enjoy your toys!

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At 46 y/o, three kids, and 18 years of marriage I am hornier than ever! Well, that might be an exaggeration, when I was younger I was in a constant state of being horny... now it's certain times of the month that I am raging horny. I can't focus, I'm flushed, soaking through my panties, have trouble sleeping. I have to masturbate before I leave the house because I am afraid I'll pounce on the first guy that smiles at me, haha. My husband and I have a decent sex life, but after almost 20 years it less than fully satisfying...thank God for toys!! haha

 

Any other women my age experience this? Usually I hear it the other way around, where the husband is always horny and the wife is not. I have a friend that complains that her husband wants sex way more than she does and it annoys her. In the back of my head I was thinking 'maybe I should hang out with your husband more.' lol

 

Embrace your horniness.. being sexual is a wonderful thing :)

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Happened to me during menopause, and continued well after. I was on the lowest dose of HRT; I'm sure that had something to do with it. More likely, it was the fact that I was free of the monthly nonsense, and recently divorced after a seventeen year bad marriage. I made up for lost time. :)

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Maybe a pre-menopausal hormone issue. You typically hear of it the other way around, that women lose all desire, but it's very possible for things to swing the other way.

 

Once you go through menopause things should even out. You'll likely still have a high sex drive (if you always have) but it won't be as unmanageable as it sounds right now.

 

Stay away from other men and enjoy your toys!

 

Agree. It's definitely hormonal. My sex drive skyrocketed at that age too during peri menopause. Then I hit menopause and my sex drive totally disappeared for about 18 months. It was shocking how fast it happened and I sadly thought that my sexual side was gone for good. Then to my surprise it came back! Now I have a fairly normal sex drive though not as strong as it used to be. I used to want sex everyday but now I'm happy with once or twice a week.

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Hi Katy, I guess a lot of ladies would envy you not to mention horny men whose wives don't entertain them! Have you discussed this matter with your husband and if so, what does he have to say? Also is your husband a spent force or is he still up to meeting your needs? Have the two of you tried viagra or other drugs of similar nature to help you tide over this phase of your life? As the other ladies have already suggested you are likely to burn up your horny hormones in a few years and then settle into a comfortable rhythm with your husband. Till then I guess you will just have to hold your horses or should I say mares and stay away from temptation as Finding my way has advised. Best of luck with everything.

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Yea, I am sure it's my age and hormonal stuff. Wasn't expecting to feel like this at 46! I am definitely a little more 'wife' than my husband can handle right now! haha

 

Thanks for your replies. Just A Guy - I know! All those horny men with wives that don't entertain them. And then this horny wife that would absolutely love to! Hence, the problem! haha

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Hi Katy, on a serious note I would like to ask you if you have consulted your gynaecologist about possible medication to counteract these episodes of high sexual desire? If so what did she/he have to say? Did he/she prescribe some medication to diffuse these desires to a level where they were manageable? Quite frankly one cannot have to suffer something of this nature when it affects your normal functioning and routine. I know you have stated that you are able to get some relief by masturbating but that is not really a satisfactory solution, long term for your situation. What happens if you are sitting in a meeting and one of these episodes strike out of nowhere? A medical solution may be the best thing for you unless of course you do not mind these episodes and actually enjoy them. I really doubt that would be the case especially where it affects your sleep patterns.

 

The other question that I wanted to put to you is whether you have explored the possibility that you may be suffering from a mild case of bi polar disorder in which case such episodic effects may be explained away. I am no expert but I have read on another web site that women affected by this disorder usually display an uncontrollable sexual desire and often quench it by behaving promiscuously with men. In your case you seem to have it under control which is why I said that you may have a mild case of bi polar syndrome. I think others with more knowledge and experience may be able to offer more specific and pointed advice in the matter. I think Downtown is the go to guy for such advice. Best wishes.

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My experience was similar to yours, OP. I've always had a fairly high sex drive but it went nuts for a few years, along with my moods, hot flashes, etc - so all the typical issues.

 

If you're finding it difficult to deal with, certainly talk to your doctor. I chose not to take any of the drugs or even natural supplements (since they both can present cancer concerns) and came through it all with my sex drive still firmly intact, but back to manageable levels.

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Hi Katy, any updates on your situation? It came to my mind that even if your husband could not perform sexually you could still enlist his help more often with oral or other means of stimulating you to help you get your needs met. Although these measures are not as satisfying or fulfilling as PIV sex they still involve your husband and I think getting him involved is definitely better than going it alone and certainly more satisfying. Sex is as much about emotional fulfilment as it is about getting your rocks off. Your husband being there with you you will certainly fulfil your emotional needs and maybe get him worked up enough to do the deed with you after all. Just a thought! Best wishes.

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Hi ,

 

I advise you to be careful and address the below points .

 

-1) sharing sexual experience even if it is masturbation is a sign of a healthy marriage ; ppl used to critisize me when I used to consider masturbation without the consent and involvement of partner is like cheating to me , it means that the partner is not willing to sacrifice ( if we told them about our desires )...

 

-2) accordingly if you love your family and you are not have the intention to find a new nest or partner ; sharing your desires with your hubby is a must to do ; this doesn't mean you are banned from fantasizing , it means that during this high desire time ; your hubby should satisfy your needs as you should do if it was the other way around , A partner should use everything the mind can think of ... my wife hates fingering , oral , anal ,yet when she doesn't get an orgasm after i finish and i feel she still in need , I use my

leg and sqeeze her until she comes ....

 

-3) It all starts in our minds, you should share maximum with your husband , if he is low in desires , he should sacrifice and make up via other means that satisfies you , the other way around also is expected from you .

-4) no medecine is a remedy , because the desire if suppressed it is a silent bomb .

 

-5) cheating , attempts to cheat and seeking satisfaction outside the nest are a self destruction , forget about ethics , forget about morals ; I am talking about your self integrity , people who are not cheaters by nature they destroy themselves when they try it ; i passed through this ....

 

did you share details of your desires with your husband ? if so what was his reactions ?

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Hi Katy, any updates on your situation? It came to my mind that even if your husband could not perform sexually you could still enlist his help more often with oral or other means of stimulating you to help you get your needs met. Although these measures are not as satisfying or fulfilling as PIV sex they still involve your husband and I think getting him involved is definitely better than going it alone and certainly more satisfying. Sex is as much about emotional fulfilment as it is about getting your rocks off. Your husband being there with you you will certainly fulfil your emotional needs and maybe get him worked up enough to do the deed with you after all. Just a thought! Best wishes.

 

 

Agree , just want to mention that in some periods of time , some ladies gets more intense orgasms from Oral,or other sexual activities than PIV itself .

we men don't sometimes understand it , or evensome of us feel ashamed if our partner does it , but it is true ...

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I didn't have kids and I was bad enough when I was young to be very explorative, but I went through a long depression in my 40s and when I snapped out of it, I was miserably hormonal, and I was about 49 when it hit and it lasted two or three years. No boyfriend or anything, but it's just as well, I suppose. I mean, it didn't matter what I was doing, in the car, whatever, I was miserable. It was too much. It's something with hormones and mine was also blowback from the depression, some mania, probably. But I sympathize. Just be sure you've got your toys handy. Don't travel without them!

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MidnightBlue1980

Hi Katy. I am 46. I am curious about your diet and exercise regime. When I am really good, clean low carb diet, lots of good exercise, sleep, I am very sexual. When I lie about eating cheesesteaks and pizza...not so much. I could basically go without sex for the rest of my life.

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Hi Midnight, I am not very clear about what you were trying to get across. You say you are a very sexual person and then you say you could go without sex for for the rest of your life! Two incompatible statements to my mind. So what exactly is it? Thanks.

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Hi Katy,

 

All I can say is DAMN.. LOL

 

I agree with "Just a Guy". Hang in there.

Definitely a lot of assumptions going on here, haha. There are no medical issues, with the exception of possible pre-menopausal stuff. My husband and I have sex all the time. I have always been horny, really horny, haha! I just didn't expect to still be this damn horny at 46 y/o. And with my now "mature" mind, I start thinking stuff like, hmm maybe my husband wouldn't mind if he gets to watch! haha...and yes, it's been discussed.

 

Anyway, maybe I was a bit over-exaggerated.. I was just curious if there were other married women with kids my age, wanting it more than ever.

 

Thanks for all your replies.

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Hi Katy, actually some ladies join the Hotwife bandwagon at around your age because the conditions seem ideal. The main thing is they are empty nesters leaving them a lot of free time and space. Something to think about.

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Hi Katy, actually some ladies join the Hotwife bandwagon at around your age because the conditions seem ideal. The main thing is they are empty nesters leaving them a lot of free time and space. Something to think about.

 

It's tricky for sure, it's so against the norms of a regular marriage, but at the same time the thought of being a "hotwife," is well, so hot! haha. It almost makes me nervous how encouraging my husband is about it...almost like he's calling my bluff! haha He seems to really like the thought of it.

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Hi Katy, if your husband is encouraging then I guess you are teetering on the edge of a cliff! Actually it is your own moral compass that you will have to depend on to decide which path to follow. Sometimes fantasies are best left in the bedroom. Remember you cannot put the Genie back in the bottle after letting it out and I guess you know of Pandora's box well enough not to bear repeating. However, the final decision is up to the two of you and if you decide to go down that route then I suggest you do a lot of research and heart searching and communicating with your husband before you jump in with both feet.

 

Whatever you choose to do I would wish you the best going forward.

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Hi Katy, if your husband is encouraging then I guess you are teetering on the edge of a cliff! Actually it is your own moral compass that you will have to depend on to decide which path to follow. Sometimes fantasies are best left in the bedroom. Remember you cannot put the Genie back in the bottle after letting it out and I guess you know of Pandora's box well enough not to bear repeating. However, the final decision is up to the two of you and if you decide to go down that route then I suggest you do a lot of research and heart searching and communicating with your husband before you jump in with both feet.

 

Whatever you choose to do I would wish you the best going forward.

 

Yea, I know what you mean about somethings are better left fantasy. It's interesting that my husband is as much turned on by the idea as I am, but in reality I don't know if we are cut out of it. A few years ago I gave a guy a BJ... it was super hot in the moment but the following days i felt sleazy and had anxiety...who knows.

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Definitely a lot of assumptions going on here, haha. There are no medical issues, with the exception of possible pre-menopausal stuff. My husband and I have sex all the time. I have always been horny, really horny, haha! I just didn't expect to still be this damn horny at 46 y/o. And with my now "mature" mind, I start thinking stuff like, hmm maybe my husband wouldn't mind if he gets to watch! haha...and yes, it's been discussed.

 

Anyway, maybe I was a bit over-exaggerated.. I was just curious if there were other married women with kids my age, wanting it more than ever.

 

Thanks for all your replies.

 

Yes there are; an over abundance of them.

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Yes there are; an over abundance of them.

 

 

I guess in my circle it seems mid 40s+ women are not raging horny...but you are right, the more I research and talk to ladies, it seems there are a lot of older married horn-dog moms like myself ;)

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