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More Spontaneous Wife???


Marriage & Life Partnerships Debunking the old-ball-and-chain stereotype one couple at a time.

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Old 16th August 2018, 1:39 PM   #16
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It is very encouraging for you that she changed her behavior for even a couple weeks - nude around the house, less clothes, etc. In response, how did you change your behavior to make her feel more appreciated than she was before? Just by horn-dogging her after she'd dropped her clothes? Or did you become more loving, giving and romantic during the rest of the day/week?

You need to be romancing her and flirting with her, and making her life easier & more pleasant in thoughtful ways - at any and all times of the day when you are presented a chance... because you love her and are attracted to her, and wish her comfort and happiness in general. Without expectations.

When did you last buy her flowers for 'no reason'? Surprise her with a planned out 3-stop night out? Sweep her away for an overnight getaway? Rub her feet just because you wanted to? Ordered her a little something fun for her (not sexual)? Maybe you're just romancing her off her feet daily, and she is so worn out from opening the little presents and notes you leave around the house, and going out dancing with you that she doesn't have energy left over for playtime. If so, then reign it in a little. But from what you've written, I don't think so.

I read that you wrote you maybe just needed to vent, and this is not a real problem for you. If so, disregard the above, and enjoy your marriage. Sounds like over all you two have a LOT going for you.

Cheers.
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Old 16th August 2018, 2:13 PM   #17
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She's not a mind reader. Tell her what you want & ratchet up the romance on your end.
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Old 16th August 2018, 10:41 PM   #18
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Originally Posted by Sunlight72 View Post
It is very encouraging for you that she changed her behavior for even a couple weeks - nude around the house, less clothes, etc. In response, how did you change your behavior to make her feel more appreciated than she was before? Just by horn-dogging her after she'd dropped her clothes? Or did you become more loving, giving and romantic during the rest of the day/week?

You need to be romancing her and flirting with her, and making her life easier & more pleasant in thoughtful ways - at any and all times of the day when you are presented a chance... because you love her and are attracted to her, and wish her comfort and happiness in general. Without expectations.

When did you last buy her flowers for 'no reason'? Surprise her with a planned out 3-stop night out? Sweep her away for an overnight getaway? Rub her feet just because you wanted to? Ordered her a little something fun for her (not sexual)? Maybe you're just romancing her off her feet daily, and she is so worn out from opening the little presents and notes you leave around the house, and going out dancing with you that she doesn't have energy left over for playtime. If so, then reign it in a little. But from what you've written, I don't think so.

I read that you wrote you maybe just needed to vent, and this is not a real problem for you. If so, disregard the above, and enjoy your marriage. Sounds like over all you two have a LOT going for you.

Cheers.
Well been a couple months since I sent her flowers for no reason but then again we have been on vaction those 2 months. We have weekly date nights, and now we do it a couple nights a week. Eat out and then an activity, ballet, theather, art show etc. I know I am lucky to have her so I try to keep her impressed. We also work together, different departments so I am able to see and talk to her during the day.
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Old 16th August 2018, 10:43 PM   #19
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Make yourself sexy and irresistible. You want her to want to do those spontaneous things, instead of doing just for the sake of pleasing you. Make her feel desired and sexy, flirt with her, take care of your looks in case you’ve let yourself go after all these years.
No we are inshape and active. Gym 5-6 days a week, together. And most of our extra caricular activities are active, hiking, sports etc.
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Old 17th August 2018, 8:09 PM   #20
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Well been a couple months since I sent her flowers for no reason but then again we have been on vaction those 2 months. We have weekly date nights, and now we do it a couple nights a week. Eat out and then an activity, ballet, theather, art show etc. I know I am lucky to have her so I try to keep her impressed. We also work together, different departments so I am able to see and talk to her during the day.
Great.

And when she changed her moves to show you she was interested in a sexier, freer rhythm for those few weeks, did you change what you were doing for her?
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