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No trust left, not sure if I should divorce


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Old 10th December 2018, 6:50 PM   #61
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You are an adult. I realize life is tough, but you needed to have yourfinancial affairs in order before you started a family. Other family members are not responsible to bail you out. You and your husband are going to have to grab the proverbial shovel and dig yourself out of your financial hole.
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Old 19th December 2018, 1:48 AM   #62
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Problem is he supervises one of the days with us and my mum. I'm not sure what would happen if I cut him off. If my mum would still continue supervising for us?
If not, I don't currently have the money to go back to the lawyers and change it.

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I advised you to cut your dad out of your life and you respond with this.

What report are you talking about and how is it connected to cutting/not cutting off your father?
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Old 19th December 2018, 1:53 AM   #63
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It's also hard having an unstable marriage and having enough of this business with my husband.


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I advised you to cut your dad out of your life and you respond with this.

What report are you talking about and how is it connected to cutting/not cutting off your father?
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Old 19th December 2018, 2:03 AM   #64
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Just can't decide whether to stay in this relationship because of the 24/7 arguing ever since this happened. And letting his parents be extremely controlling and refusing to give back our child.
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Old 19th December 2018, 9:11 AM   #65
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After clean up I'm going to ask that everyone assume an OP to be truthful in what they have chosen to share when it comes to writing your replies. If you are unable to do that, you are not required to respond.

As always, any accusations of lying or trolling should be sent to moderation and not posted on the open forum.

Future accusations on this thread will be treated as a troll call-out with immediate time on moderation for the accuser.

Those looking for more information on the OPs arrangement with their in-laws can refer to the consolidated past threads here. My in laws filed for custody of my daughter, now we are living separately
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Old 19th December 2018, 2:34 PM   #66
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I think that at this point you need to let go of the resentment towards your father and the money/vacation thing and really take a moment to focus on your end goal.

Do you want to get your child back full time in your custody?

What do you need to do in order to achieve that?
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Old 31st December 2018, 11:06 AM   #67
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Still being harassed 24/7 from my husband about my dad lies and my husband wanting me to talk/ cut off my dad. To the point where we can't even work together.

Like every week, my husband says he's going to have a go at my dad and then doesn't (when my parents supervise on Sundays).

Then my husband says "I want to get you pregnant". Despite our financial situation and arguing about money 24/7. I got angry and asked if has he learnt nothing from this situation at all? and stormed out.

I don't know whether to get divorced.
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Old 31st December 2018, 11:09 AM   #68
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As always never did get an apology and yet my dad can fly across the other side of world and "help" my sister out for 8 weeks. Who only had the flu. So how does that work out?

I'm being harassed 24/7 from my husband to do something about my dad.
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Old 31st December 2018, 11:20 AM   #69
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I try and tell my husband this, but he doesn't listen.


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My father was the same kind of man, likely worse in that he was physically abusive as well. But I never asked him for any sort of help after I moved out to the city at 19. I found my own way. Even when I was living in the city and had no money to buy food, I pushed through without his help. Iíd rather starve than hear his abuse.

If your father are all those things, then 1) you should not expect his help 2) you should not ask for his help 3) you should expect that someone like him may not be reliable.

Again, you are quick to point out his negatives but you have no issues feeling entitled and having these expectations that he support you.

You really need to find your own independence. Thereís a reason why you are in this situation. Itís because of the bad choices YOU have made. In that sense, itís your responsibility and only yours to fix them.
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Old 31st December 2018, 11:22 AM   #70
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Really feel like I've lost attraction to my husband, as he was fine with my in laws refusing to give our child back. I've never cheated on anyone, but I've sure been tempted to now.

Last edited by LoveShack.org Moderator; 31st December 2018 at 11:32 AM..
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Old 31st December 2018, 11:32 AM   #71
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You shouldn't be tempted to cheat.. how is that going to solve anything ?

You should be tempted to divorce him though....

And his comment about wanting to get you pregnant.. OMG.. make sure you are on BC and in charge of it, don't you dare trust him to put a condom on and it not have a hole in it...

Last edited by LoveShack.org Moderator; 9th January 2019 at 9:42 AM..
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Old 31st December 2018, 11:40 AM   #72
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I guess it wouldn't solve anything. There's just so much resentment. The fact that my husband didn't seem to care at all they were treating me like damn child and telling me I must be "supervised" with my own kid. And being threatened and verbally abused by my sister in law on a daily basis, while my in laws did nothing. And I still get NO ANSWERS from them about this, why they lied about taking me for custody. When I'm the one who was being threatened and verbally abused?


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You shouldn't be tempted to cheap.. how is that going to solve anything ?

You should be tempted to divorce him though....

And his comment about wanting to get you pregnant.. OMG.. make sure you are on BC and in charge of it, don't you dare trust him to put a condom on and it not have a hole in it...
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Old 1st January 2019, 9:09 AM   #73
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no joke

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I've been trying everything to fix this situation and I can't stand the 24/7 fighting with my husband. Still struggling financially but he doesn't want me to get another job. I've really been suicidal.



no, i don't think you deserve to have your child back yet. Even any thoughts of suicidal is no joke, let alone to have a child with you. I'm afraid you might take the child "down with you" when all else fails. I've heard terrifying stories of that already. This subject is no joke.
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Old 13th January 2019, 7:07 AM   #74
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I would never hurt my child. I'm just sick and tired of living with hell and having to be supervised with these people.

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no, i don't think you deserve to have your child back yet. Even any thoughts of suicidal is no joke, let alone to have a child with you. I'm afraid you might take the child "down with you" when all else fails. I've heard terrifying stories of that already. This subject is no joke.
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Old 13th January 2019, 7:10 AM   #75
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I just don't know what to do. My parents want me to divorce and my husband wants me to cut off my father. My husband uses our time with my daughter, just to complain about me the whole time. My husband still argues 24/7 about my dad everyday and I tell him everyday, that I don't have the answers.
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