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He is Catholic, I am not. Neither of us are very religious but want to get married.


Marriage & Life Partnerships Debunking the old-ball-and-chain stereotype one couple at a time.

 
 
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Old 8th February 2006, 1:29 PM   #16
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Originally Posted by yuv
Check out the Episcopal church. They will require pre-marriage classes that I guarantee you will find useful because they won't beat you over the head with religion (some people think that's what happens at these things--it doesn't). The Episcopal ceremoney requires that ONE of you be a baptized Christian, the ceremony is very Catholic-like so your spouse to be will feel very at home (in terms of seeing what they might have been used to), and one of the best things... it's viewed as a sacramental between the two of you. In other words, they make no claim on your future offspring like the Orthodox or Cathloic churches.

As for xring's experience, a Catholic church will no longer permit a concelebration with another officiant of a different denomination--if you're in a Catholic church, they won't allow a minister these days. Personally, I had a small Catholic ceremony with literally ten people, and our larger ceremony with 100 guests was officiated by an Episcopal priest. BTW, an Episcopal priest can marry you anywhere, like a reception hall. A Catholic priest must marry you inside of a church. It sounds therefore like you should probably resolve these questions by talking to an Episcopal priest, or perhaps a pastor from another Christian denomination, such as Congregational.

Hope this helped
This post and others contain several incorrect statements. First, it is false that a Catholic wedding may only occur in a church. It is also false that a priest must preside over the wedding. Since marriage is the one sacrament that the priest does not minister (the bride and groom minister it to each other), a priest is not required and other church officers may conduct the ceremony.

Since you are not Catholic, you can get a dispensation from the church to allow the marriage. It is routine can costs $5-10.

Pre-Cana is required for all couples, even if both are Catholic.

If you do the church wedding, you can do either a Mass or a Liturgy of the Word. I suggest the latter since it would be a bit awkward for you to be unable to receive the Eucharist at your own wedding.

Like anyone else who is married in the Church, you also must promise the raise your children as Catholics.

You should discuss all this with your fiance's church. Of course, since neither of you cares about religion, why have a religious ceremony? Just find someone who is empowered by the state to solemnize marriage and you can have the wedding anywhere you damn well please.
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Old 8th February 2006, 2:37 PM   #17
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Deciding what to do about the ceremony itself is easy compared to dealing with everyday married life. I'd think twice and consider carefully whether the difference in your faiths will adversely affect your chances at a successful marriage.

Especially since this is already weighing heavy on your mind...and you're not even married yet. Good luck whatever you decide to do. Personally, I'd never make a promise to anyone that I would raise my kids in that hokey religion...and I certainly would never baptize them while they are still little babies. That would have to be their choice when they get older.
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Old 8th February 2006, 6:08 PM   #18
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Originally Posted by Guest
This post and others contain several incorrect statements. First, it is false that a Catholic wedding may only occur in a church.
No, this is true. I JUST spoke to two different priests and both said that Catholic priests cannot marry outside of the church, and if you choose to have it outside of the church the marriage is not considered sacramentally valid and it is just viewed as you living with a man (or woman).
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Old 8th February 2006, 9:41 PM   #19
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In a catholic church. Is that possible?
Can we get married in a not very religious ceremony in a Catholic church? Possible?
thanks...

i was married in a beautiful baroque chapel in Rome and registered in the catholic parish as a wedding--we were considered to be married in the catholic church. but it was a protestant ceremony performed by a british methodist missionary to india (this was under the prior pope who was more liberal, and my fiance and i had to go to the vicariate and make some pledges to satisfy the catholic church). we were both protestants.

i doubt that they would have let us marry in a not-religious ceremony, however.

btw, this was a first in the Catholic church!
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Old 9th February 2006, 5:07 PM   #20
 
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Originally Posted by guest000
In a catholic church. Is that possible?
Can we get married in a not very religious ceremony in a Catholic church? Possible?
thanks...
Yep no prob, my O/H is very catholic , I was lapsed C/E
We had a Catholic service without the mass.
All the Catholic church wanted was my Christening cert..
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Old 9th February 2006, 5:29 PM   #21
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This post and others contain several incorrect statements. First, it is false that a Catholic wedding may only occur in a church. It is also false that a priest must preside over the wedding. Since marriage is the one sacrament that the priest does not minister (the bride and groom minister it to each other), a priest is not required and other church officers may conduct the ceremony.

a Catholic wedding has as its presider an ordained member of the clergy (deacon, priest or bishop); they are not "officers" of the church. It is my understanding that the ceremony must take place on consecrated ground (chapel, church).

Do you know if it is viewed as sacramental if it were to be Lutheran? Can you provide any more info on what the Episcopal church believes and it's customs? I was raised Catholic but am having similar issues and want to know more about other Christian religions.

only if that non-Catholic church considers marriage a sacrament in the same way the Catholic Church does; however, the Church does recognize marriages between two non-Catholics or a Cath/non-Cath as valid (sacramental) as long are there are no impediments to that marriage (i.e. this is a first marriage for both). In fact, part of the annulment process in the church is to determine whether a previous marriage was valid in the Church, and those are the issues they look at.
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