Mapper71 Posted May 12, 2016 Share Posted May 12, 2016 Oh you'll love this! The excitement never ends when H is around! I go to bed last night about 10:00. H says he's going to sit on the computer for a while and then come to bed. Well he's on the computer for about 15 minutes before I hear him turn it off and then go into the garage. I hear him open the garage and assume he decided to go work on his race motorcycle since there is a track day next Monday. And as a side note, he actually won a season of track days because they drew his name from a raffle ticket. So 4 track days he can go to for free, and they usually cost around $250 a day so a $1000 prize! So anyways after the garage door opens I must have fallen asleep. About 15 minutes later I wake to him starting up the bike. Really? 10:30 at night and you decide to do this and wake up not only me but probably the neighbors? Shortly thereafter while the engine is going, I hear a loud thud and I assume he dropped something but I don't get worried about it and almost fall back asleep but then hear him talking to the neighbor. The guy is up all night long I think. About 11, H comes into the bedroom and says to me "I'm sorry to wake you, but I need your help pushing the bike back into the garage." I say "I heard you talking to the neighbor. Why was he over here this late?” He goes "I set the bike on fire and he saw what was going on and came over with his hose and put it out." WHAT??!! You set the bike on fire in the garage! First off, the garage smelled horribly of gas when I got home yesterday. So much so that the living room stunk of it. He had been trying to get gas out of something in the bike apparently the day before. He was explaining to me that in order to do it it’s something with the spark plug and you have to start up the bike to do it. So he does that and the starting of the bike set the gas tank on fire and he had old oily rags stuck in the gas tank for some reason too to keep the gas from spilling out! Luckily the truck wasn’t parked in the driveway so he was able to back out his street bike first, which was in the way. Then said he had to reach into the fire and pull out the rags and back the on-fire bike into the driveway and this is when the neighbor came over with the hose. The fire extinguisher was in the trailer so he couldn’t get that. H said he was just going to call the fire department once the bike was backed out and have them come and put it out. Oh yeah, THAT’s all we need is the roar of the sirens in the neighborhood to alert the everyone to what an idiotic thing you did! He burned the hair off his arm, lost a few eyelashes and a bit of eyebrow. Nothing else got burned and quite frankly I can’t even tell the bike was on fire, but he says now the engine is toast so he won’t be racing that this year. So the one year you get a free pass to race, where it won’t cost you any money, you now can’t do it! He could have set the garage or the entire house on fire for that much! Between that and him having the car fall off the jack on Monday and bending a part that I now have to pay to have replaced, to him being in 2 bad accidents last year requiring hospitalization, him and the damn collections agency that called MY work for one of HIS old debts (oh and the debt was his daughter's mother's engagement ring from 20 years ago which made it even better!), it’s unreal! Yet when I do something as minute as winding up the hose with small loops rather than large loops, or weedwhacking on setting 2 when it should definitely be on setting 3 because I’m ruining it on 2, or digging a hole for a bush in the wrong spot, he gets bent out of shape and acts like it’s the end of the world. Let’s see, which is worse, almost setting the house on fire or having small loops in the hose? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted May 12, 2016 Share Posted May 12, 2016 Sounds like some poor decision making because of intoxication... Sorry Mapper, at least he didn't burn the house down and kill you in the process.. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mapper71 Posted May 12, 2016 Author Share Posted May 12, 2016 Somebody's going to die before their time with his great decision making...just haven't figured out if it's going to be me or him! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ChickiePops Posted May 13, 2016 Share Posted May 13, 2016 I honestly cannot figure out how a grown man could set a motorcycle on fire. In fact, I can't figure out how a child could either. Serious question..is your husband an addict? Does he hide pills, powder, pot, or alcohol around the house? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted May 13, 2016 Share Posted May 13, 2016 I don't think you're looking for advice but rather comments? I couldn't imagine being married to a foolish man-child who brought nothing to the table but constant debt and headaches due to his inability to grow up into a responsible adult. I guess all I can say is better you than me. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
NTV Posted May 13, 2016 Share Posted May 13, 2016 Well that's gotta be embarrassing for him. Lol. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mapper71 Posted May 13, 2016 Author Share Posted May 13, 2016 I honestly cannot figure out how a grown man could set a motorcycle on fire. In fact, I can't figure out how a child could either. Serious question..is your husband an addict? Does he hide pills, powder, pot, or alcohol around the house? The only pills he takes are for the pain from the accident(s) last year and he openly drinks and smokes pot. Pot is legal here so nobody hides it anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
ChickiePops Posted May 13, 2016 Share Posted May 13, 2016 The only pills he takes are for the pain from the accident(s) last year and he openly drinks and smokes pot. Pot is legal here so nobody hides it anymore. Pot is legal here too. Alcohol is legal too but if you drink too much of it your reaction times slow down to a crawl and you get clumsy and stupid. That wasn't my question...I want to know if he does any of those things excessively. And it sounds like he very well might, along with mixing them together and missing days of work. And he's endangering both of you. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
scorpiogirl Posted May 13, 2016 Share Posted May 13, 2016 So what is it you hope to achieve with your post? You don't seem to want advice, or if you do, you don't follow it because your husband is just a loser. You refuse to leave him. I'm guessing that your friends and family are no longer interested in listening to you complain about him, so you post here hoping for commiseration. Isn't it exhausting constantly having to check up on him, worrying that he might burn down, he lies about work and doesn't bring all the money he should into the house? You both need help. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
JulieEverette Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 If he is in so much pain from the accident how is he working on bikes and cars and doing all this physical stuff? 4 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 The only pills he takes are for the pain from the accident(s) last year and he openly drinks and smokes pot. Pot is legal here so nobody hides it anymore. Are you sure he isn't hopped up on pain killers? Combo that with pot and some drinking that's not good. Anyway, not sure what advice you want but I'll try to give you some. Your H should quit all booze and drugs because it affects his decision making. It's affecting his ability to work and stay clear minded and sharp. He's in a place where he's lying to you more often and now burning his motorcycle, putting your life at risk, let alone the house and everything you two own. His reasons for doing it are foolish at best. Please stand up to him once and for all, stop enabling his behavior and get him the help he needs. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
dreamingoftigers Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 Time for Al-Anon to learn about boundaries etc. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 The only pills he takes are for the pain from the accident(s) last year and he openly drinks and smokes pot. Pot is legal here so nobody hides it anymore. All of those things alter any person. Your husband likely does dumb, stupid things because he's not in his right mind. Yet you don't ever admit it or see it - making you a perfect co dependent - especially because it gives you some things to complain about - which every good co dependent loves. You're helping him stay addicted Mapper because you never give him consequences. You make excuses for his bad behavior and you stay married to a jerk. This decision is yours and yours alone. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 Mapper, he does these things because you let him. He will continue to do these things and you will continue to post all his problems until - someday - he either kills himself, kills you, or you get the balls to do something to change the situation. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 If he has such severe pain - why is he riding a motorcycle? Sounds like your husband likes to take you for a ride - and I don't mean on his bike. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dreamingoftigers Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 One thing I notice often is that you make your complaints known. Now, the key here is, to make them known to someone who can do something about them: your husband. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
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