tee527 Posted June 20, 2014 Share Posted June 20, 2014 my husband has physically cheated on me and now says he has changed though now I find out via an open email that he posts to CL to men and women playing like he is gonna hook up with them gets their pics and then gets off on it I also found him on adult friend finder with his real pic saying he is single it states our zip code and area of city of where we live he got upset that I was upset???? this is cheating as far as I am concerned Am I crazy???? if we agreed to this then ok...but Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 20, 2014 Share Posted June 20, 2014 Based on what you posted, you're not crazy. something is definitely wrong / missing in your marriage. If you can't solve it with his participation & cessation of promises (real or not) to meet other people for sex, you might as well end it because they is not much worth saving. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
rockland45 Posted June 20, 2014 Share Posted June 20, 2014 Well, I don't blame you for questioning your husband's behavior and wanting to get to the bottom of what's going on. It certainly seems odd he'd be saying he's single on other websites...But, if he's not willing to admit any fault here, you might want to present the idea of talking with a counselor to him. Perhaps they can help him see why you're concerned about what you're observing and, just in general, therapy can often make a huge difference in a marriage. Of course, if your husband isn't open to this, it still may not hurt to see someone on your own. At the least, hopefully they can give you some guidance on how to respond here and what the future holds for your relationship. In the meantime, you'll be in my prayers! Link to post Share on other sites
BetrayedH Posted June 23, 2014 Share Posted June 23, 2014 my husband has physically cheated on me and now says he has changed though now I find out via an open email that he posts to CL to men and women playing like he is gonna hook up with them gets their pics and then gets off on it I also found him on adult friend finder with his real pic saying he is single it states our zip code and area of city of where we live he got upset that I was upset???? this is cheating as far as I am concerned Am I crazy???? if we agreed to this then ok...but Look up the term, gaslighting. It's happening to you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
artsygirl78 Posted June 30, 2014 Share Posted June 30, 2014 Take it from someone who just broke up with a boyfriend that just tried "gaslighting" her - you are not crazy. There is cheating going on. Trust your eyes and your gut. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
oldshirt Posted June 30, 2014 Share Posted June 30, 2014 so you've been married two years, he's already cheated on you physically, he ignores you and tells you to leave the room and leave him alone and now you find out he trying to hook up with other women AND MEN?? Let's assume for a moment he hasn't actually stuck his penis in one of these other men or women yet ('yet' being the key word here) Doesn't the concept of intent mean anything to you?? Doesn't it matter that he hasn't screwed any of them is just a technicality that none of these other people have taken him up on it yet? In other words, he may not have been with any of these people but it just because they haven't found the time and place that works for them yet. Once some gal says "OK"he IS going to stick his dck in her. You're not crazy. This guy is plotting and planning to be a creeper and that is assuming he isn't blowing other dudes behind the bathrooms in the park at night to begin with. and while he is sitting at the computer with his pants down around his ankles at home, he is giving you the brush-off and not giving you the attention and consideration you want. You don't mention anything about having children together so the question remains why are you with him at all and why do you need to ask strangers on the internet if you are crazy for being disturbed by this? Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted July 1, 2014 Share Posted July 1, 2014 Oh my goodness. I used to be very active on a sex/erotic site/forum and had the "privilege" of chatting with COUNTLESS married men who confessed to having lived these double lives online. Up until I found this particular site and interacted with people on there I had no idea just how common this actually is among married men especially and what an utter epidemic it appears to be. My biggest take away meeting this men? NOTHING is as it seems and thanks to the wacky world wide web, promiscuity and infidelity of ALL kinds are alive and well and more pervasive than ever. Believe me when I tell you that what you've seen so far, what you've learned about some of the things your husband has been up to is just the tip of the iceberg! Where there is smoke there is fire and honey, I'm willing to bet that you've only just begun to scratch the service here. Trust me. You are NOT crazy and the reference to gaslighting is indeed being done to you. Now the question is, what are you going to do about it? Link to post Share on other sites
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