VikkiV Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 Ok, so im with my bf for almost 8 yrs now and living together for about 2. in the past year or 2 he has been more and more unaffectionate. he always says I annoy him or he just ignores me completely. At the end of my day at work and or his asking how was your day or explaining mine is like pulling teeth. he will just stare at his phone texting. he never wants to take me anywhere or do anything fun with me but he will get drunk and go out with the guys and this one girl who always goes to these parties. he says he doesn't care for her but yet he knows I don't like her for said fact that she likes him and wants to f&%* him. he never tells me when there hanging and when he does go out and I ask how did it go or who was there he gets very vauge, and ignores most of my questions or anything else I have to say. lately he doesn't hold my had anymore in public and doesn't kiss me goodbye or in public no more. I don't understand why, why this switch, im a good gf always thinking of him and trying to help him through the stresses of life, but yet he gives me no love and affection and we barely f%#* now. what did I do to deserve this what is going on? is it a guy thing pls any advice or experience would be greatly appreciated!!!!!!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Zimber Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 Sounds like his interest level has dipped pretty low. Regardless, his behavior is rude and he seems to be quite preoccupied. I think you need to have a talk. Just emotionally prepare yourself first if you can as the talk might not be that threatening too him. If you're hopelessly hooked on this guy, I suppose there may be other methods to stir his interest. The usual crap, get in shape, get some things happening in your own life and see if he reacts. If you've changed radically in the last 8 years (weight gain, live at home in flannel jammies, don't really get dressed up anymore), it may be he finds this "I wanna hump you girl" quite exciting. From the brief amount you've shared, it sounds like you have reason to be concerned. Please, start preparing yourself. Don't be a victim. Z 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 He's treating you rudely because YOU ARE ALLOWING IT! Let him know his conduct is inappropriate and unacceptable. If he doesn't change immediately, hit the road. Yes, it may be painful for a short time but there is nothing more painful in life than being married to an abuser. If you think for a second you could have a life with this man, PLEASE see a qualified counselor. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Arieswoman Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 I fully agree with TonyT. He behaves this way because you put up with it. My exH started being like this when his affair started. Like you I was trying all ways to fix what I thought was wrong with our marriage, when, unbeknown to me he had checked out of it. You must brace yourself and have a serious talk with him. Tell him straight that his behaviour is unacceptable. Don't be a doormat like I was. Don't stick your head in the sand like I did. If he won't listen or doesn't want to alter his behaviour then you must prepare to part company. There is no future for you at the moment. Good Luck. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 There is a simple cure for this. End the relationship. He's already checked out emotionally & physically. Other than shared history & the walls of your apartment, nothing is holding you together. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 There is a simple cure for this. End the relationship. He's already checked out emotionally & physically. Other than shared history & the walls of your apartment, nothing is holding you together. Yup. Something similar happened to me, right around the 8-year mark too. He's not into it anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
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