woodstok Posted July 24, 2004 Share Posted July 24, 2004 Ok so my ex-girlfriend and i broke up about 2 months ago and since then we have stayed very close, gone out, talked and even decided we would work things out and build back what we had. She left me because she felt as though sometimes i did not show her that i loved her enough and even said i could have told her a few more times that i loved her. She also felt as though when we talked about marriage i was not sincere enough about my feelings and that is why she always hinted at marriage to see what i would say, but obviously the old saying you dont know what you have til its gone is written all over my head. So my question is, i have done a lot of thinking and i have never for a moment doubted my feelings for her. i love her, i see myself with her in the future and know that with this one life that i have i would want nothing more than to go through it with her by my side. I know she still loves me because she tells me so, and she even told her mother and most of her friends she felt she could spend the rest of her life with me, they were all surprised when we broke up because of the way she spoke to them about me. If things were not meant to be she and i would not be here talking and trying to work things out 2 months later. So i have a question, i am ready to make the commitment and have no doubts nor would i ever have any regrets about asking her to marry me, so should I? One of my close friends that knows the both of us very well, said i should propose to her, and i want to but with the break up and the fact that we decided to work things out but take them slow i dont know if right now if should. Maybe that is what she wants is a commitment but i am unsure if i should wait or if i should just do it. I even thought about maybe doing it when we go on vacation together in about 2 1/2 months, what do you guys think? Any women here that could give me advice? what would you do if someone you saw yourself with the rest of your life, but broke up with them and then decided to take things slow, proposed to you? Should i wait, but what if i wait to long? what if i lose her during this time? Link to post Share on other sites
Curt Posted July 24, 2004 Moderators Share Posted July 24, 2004 Take it Slow. Make sure you both know where you're heading. BTW, I think you just posted one of the nicest threads I've seen in a while. I think you both will really enjoy getting things rebuilt. The vacation proposal sounds like it might be a great time. Curt Link to post Share on other sites
drinana Posted July 24, 2004 Share Posted July 24, 2004 Hey woodstok... I really think that you should wait. What is the rush? You said that you're worried that you might lose her during this time. Well, if that happens then ( i hate to sound like a book) it wasn't meant to be. You guys should just take this time to re-build your foundation and then after a while consider getting engaged. If she truly loves you the way it sounds she does, then you guys will make it... Best of luck to you.. Link to post Share on other sites
Jacksin Posted July 26, 2004 Share Posted July 26, 2004 I agree (whats the hurry?) let your relationship settle and let it roll along for quite a while and then maybe have a long engagement. Then if you have no doubts , by all means marry her. Simply tieing the knot will not bind you together forever, after all its only a piece of paper. Jack Link to post Share on other sites
Author woodstok Posted July 26, 2004 Author Share Posted July 26, 2004 I am in no rush, and i am very realistic and know very well marriage is not secure either so its not to try and tie her down. my question i guess was, i thought maybe she was looking for me to make that commitment, i mean is that what she wants? she said she always felt as though i was not very sincere when i said i could marry her and was not sure if i meant it like she did. she could see herself with me the rest of her life but she was not confident in the way i said it i guess. i just kinda brushed it off at times because i got comfortable in the relationship and felt it was going to happen so why talk about it but hey it was a mistake and i have realiz3ed that. i should have told her i felt the same but whats done is done, i learned and will change things, i am just confused as to working things out slowly and building back what we had is good? or is she wanting a commitment from me? Link to post Share on other sites
FolderWife Posted July 26, 2004 Share Posted July 26, 2004 If you have to ask a bunch of strangers whether or not you should propose, then I'd opt for no...now I'll go read your story Link to post Share on other sites
Author woodstok Posted July 27, 2004 Author Share Posted July 27, 2004 I just want to get some outside perspective and there is nothing wrong with that. I will do what i feel is in my heart and what i feel is right ultimately regardless of what some people tell me to do or not do. Advice and outside opinions just sometimes help to better understand and see your decision, but like i said in the end we all do whats best or feel is best for us, unless you do what others say which in that aspect you might as well dig a ditch, we only have one life and when its over its over, there is no more here and now or future, its only here and now when we are here. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts