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Is husband cheating online?


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I need someones opinion. I think my husband may be cheating online. I can't monitor his computer because he (I think) is using his computer at work and is heavy with security. We met online and have been married over yrs now, but I can't help but feel something is up. He stopped his email at home, except for the one we have together. I know he has one at work. He has been coming with excuses to go back to the office to check his "work" email. There's more, but I am beating myself up with insecurity. Can anyone help me with this, or give me an opinion? Thank you

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What are some of the other clues? If he's using his computer at work and there is tight security, chances are that the IT personnel is screening all of his emails. Just because he says he's going to go check his email at work doesn't mean he's cheating. He could actually be working.

 

You didn't really have a lot of information backing up your suspicions.

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He is THE monitor where he works. He is the one that monitors the computers. When he had his email at home, he had numberous women "Buddies" that would IM him. I walked in on him one day and he said she was just a friend. But I found an old email from a woman that he had a pretty hot relationship with the same time he had one with me. He also had (or had) a friend (female) that I think he still has contact with. Her pic is in a photo album that I gave him as a gift. If I say anything that would make him think I was jealous, he gets very defensive. And to respond to the suggestion I go to the office with him, I have...but I think he still chats at work during the day. Also, I have found suspicous numbers (cell) on our cell phone, and his reply is that its a client, so I really have no choice to but to take his word for it. So,,,am I being terribly insecure?

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Celia,

I don't think you're being insecure, ok well, maybe a tad. But there looks like there is cause to be. Has he been sexual with you lately? How about any other sudden changes in his habits? Also, has he accused you of cheating? Normally a cheater will accuse his or her spouse just to make them feel better about themselves.

 

See if he's interested in doing something with you outside of the house.....if he's afraid to be seen in publice with you then that's another sign that he wants to appear, "Available".

 

Good Luck

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Buterfly_Queen

Trust your gut instinct. If you feel something is wrong, then it probably is.

 

 

 

________________________

 

 

When in doubt, check it out.

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No, he doesn't seem to have lost interest in me, or he seems to want to go places with me....I don't know what it is. He's a little preoccupied with a new business venture, which is to be expected. But, I don't know why I have this little nagging feeling. Thank you all for your input. It helps to just talk to someone instead of keeping it all inside. Thank you, all for you help.

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Pyrannaste
Originally posted by brashgal

Volunteer to go back to the office with him, see how he reacts.

 

I like brashgal's idea.

Once you are there, ask him to see all his e-mails.

Not to *read* them....just to see who the sender is.

If one of them looks suspicious, ask him to let you read it.

 

IMO someone who acts so suspicious loses the right to complain if you act jealous.

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I am going to take your advice and go to the office with him, and I think, at first, when he goes to his computer, I'm going to go with him, stand behind him, and see what his reaction will be. I'll almost bet he won't get into his email. We'll see. Hey, thanks to all of you who responded and gave me great advice. It always helps to get another perspective. Thanks again.

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Unfortunately, I think you may have a reason to be concerned. It sounds like he is engaging in some seriously susupicious behavior, IMO.

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