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Not sexually attracted to my otherwise-perfect gf. Do I already know the answer?


Long-Distance Relationships Coping with geographical distance can make or break a LDR. Share your experiences and questions here.

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Old 14th November 2018, 5:39 AM   #16
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It's really sad when two people really like each other but just can't get it together in the bedroom. It's something I'm dealing with right now too. This is why people say that sex is so important.
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Old 14th November 2018, 6:13 AM   #17
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If you aren't attracted to her, you would have lost interest the first time you saw her because of her size. Yet you were excited, and went on to kiss, cuddle and be physically close.



Sounds to me like anxiety of the first time sex compauded by previous failed attempts. Would be pity to end a good thing over an issue that will fix itself in time, probably when you stop trying.
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Old 21st December 2018, 3:34 PM   #18
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Originally Posted by B.J.C. View Post
• Can you have a successful relationship without sex (I want children!)?
Unless you are both asexual, nope. I wasn't very sexually attracted to my ex-wife (she wasn't either) and had a miserable sex life for something like 15 years which eventually led to our divorce. Now I have amazing sexual chemistry with my current gf and our sex life is great. Don't make the same mistake. Sex is amazing. Don't settle for bad sex.
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Old 21st December 2018, 4:29 PM   #19
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Physical attraction is important for all of us, but at times, someone that does not meet any of those requirements happen to surprise us. This girl has already set a high standard for the next girl. If you find yourself a cute petite girl, and find out that she's not as cool and interesting, you're going to really hate yourself then. Unfortunately, that's what it takes to know ourselves. Unless you truly see a realistic future with her and this distance between you shortens, then you may need to be kind to her and let this relationship go. There's no shame in being truthful- you value this relationship as friends.
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Old 26th January 2019, 10:24 PM   #20
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I really hope for you that's the problem, aka not being attracted to her sexually. Because the alternatives are going to be gloomy for you to consider.


If I understood well, you're a virgin, so you don't really know how you score in that department, with anyone. So what can I say. Go to some club and hook up with a girl and see how it goes, just being sober, with no kind of external help. If you can't perform, will you then say it's the lack of emotional connection?
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Old 26th January 2019, 10:34 PM   #21
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and have masturbated many times – mainly to porn, sometimes to the idea of someone I’ve seen/met in my head (though I rarely focus on the business end of things, more the overall idea of being with someone) – I am more turned on by a pleasing figure/person than seeing ‘bits’ up close, they are more of a turn-off.
In my experience, a man who finds women's bits a turn off is highly unusual. Most guys can't wait to see and explore

Have you considered that you could be either asexual or gay?
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Old 27th January 2019, 12:08 PM   #22
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In my experience, a man who finds women's bits a turn off is highly unusual.
Yeah, I agree.
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