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Unexpected new LDR


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Hello,

I've met this foreign girl on Tinder in July (she was in thr country just visiting) and we hit it off pretty well. We had amazing sex the first night and then we've dated 2-3 times a week for 1 month and a half (having sex everytime). During that time we went dancing, picnic, took walks, it was great. We were really into eachother. In september she had to go back to her country for a week and then come back, but they refused her re-entry at the airport telling her she had to leave in 3 days. So obviously that was a hard blow and we spent the 2 and a half days together. Its been almost 1 month now that I haven't seen her but we're still communicating everyday.. We've been communicating everyday since the begining actually... She told me she really wants to come back over everything else. Though it could take a few months for her visa to be approved.

 

Our interactions are simple and straightforward and everything just runs smoothly. She told me a few times that she never felt this way in her life and I believe her. She did go out of her way a few times which demonstrated her interest and level of commitment, which I also did on my end. We haven't explicitely told eachother that we're in love. We're both 27 and realize that it is maybe too soon... but I am sure she is thinking about me a lot and I am too. She invited me to visit her and is even willing to pay my ticket.. but I cant anytime soon because I dont have any vacation days left at work.

 

I don't have any interest in meeting other girls or hooking up and its not about opportunities because I could easily be going out with other girls. But I just dont want to. At all. At least for now.

We didnt really discuss exclusivity but its somehow implied, at least in my thought process. We had a discussion yesterday, and she told me that she doesnt want to be the one holding me back (in regards to other relationships) so I told her exactly how I feel about not wanting to meet other girls - This triggered some tears in her eyes, but I didnt ask why, and now I regret not asking... :(

I really dont like lying about my emotions and prefer to tell what I have on my mind. However this being a new relationship, I am afraid that she'll take me for granted and maybe lose interest. I know girls love to chase and inconsciously be insecure about their man... I've been a bit clingy on texts for about 2 weeks but I never double text and now I've slowed down a lot, and she initiates a lot. We both initiate conversations but I wanted to give her some space... I didnt really ask her about what she thought about maybe meeting other guys, maybe because I dont know if she'll tell me the truth or that I'm afraid of the answer... I wish I would have asked her yesterday (especially about the tears)..

 

How can I bring back the discussion? Should I let it be (but its tormenting me)? What are your thoughts in general? Should I fear that she has cheated already or maybe soon because of the no sex situation or since she is probably in love for the first time she wouldnt want at all or is not even contemplating to meet other guys? Maybe I have trust issues, maybe Im paranoid and I did read alot on forums since the begining of the relationship but this is my first post.

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I'veseenbetterlol

This may not be what you want to hear, but here goes. I highly advise against this type of LDR. Any LDR is hard, but even harder when you barely know each other. I'm not trying to be negative, just telling you my experience. I tried dating twice long distance and ended up getting hurt. Thing is you don't know each other and there isn't any real connection. You may spend money and time on this relationship, just to find out she doesn't care about you. I did this and wasted my time. LDR, esp so long distance aren't sustainable. Finally I met someone local and I can tell that is MUCH better. Do as you want, just giving my 2 cents.

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