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From hanging out to an LDR


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Ive been seeing this guy for 4-5 months, and we always knew id be leaving the country in March with the possibility of me coming back. Looks like I will be out of the country for a month or 2, and I've been ignoring it in my head I guess. He has asked about how texts will work, will they be expensive, whats the best way of keeping in touch, should he get WhatsApp etc. Seems like he wants to stay in touch. He brought this up, not me.

 

Thing is, we are not in a committed relationship. Ive always called it a non-relationship relationship. We are not seeing anyone else and the time we spend together is great. He has always said he is rubbish at relationships, due to his anxiety etc, which I can now see why, as he shuts himself away a bit when his anxiety/depression take over. Im ok with that, I have my own life and I make sure he's ok and we can talk it through if he wants to. Then he will deal with it and come back and its fine.

 

My issue is, how do I approach the subject of me going away? Im not going to be seeing anyone else and I would like him to wait for me, but since we aren't technically in a relationship (although it feels like one) how do I talk about it without me feeling vulnerable and without scaring him away?

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No offense intended, but if you have to tiptoe around a subject like that with a guy whom you've been "seeing" for 4-5 months because otherwise he might get "scared away"... are you SURE this quasi-relationship is something that you want to pursue? I'm in full support of LDRs, especially short ones like yours, but a LDR is not a LDR when there is no "R". I honestly think you would be best off forgetting this guy and fully enjoying your trip and yes, dating other people.

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Long distance relationships are difficult when people are in full blown love you til I die relationships. It doesnt sound like you two are at that point at all. You are having difficult defining your relationship while together, what do you thing long distance will do?

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  • 4 weeks later...
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well, i left the country. Coming back in less than 2 weeks for a visit for a week. We've stayed in touch.. Says he misses me. He's sending me songs... Meeting him when im back for a week. Who knows.

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