Community Forums

Reload this Page Community Forums > Romantic > Long-Distance Relationships

Am I crazy for trying?

Long-Distance Relationships Coping with geographical distance can make or break a LDR. Share your experiences and questions here.

Like Tree1Likes
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 8th February 2018, 12:59 PM   #1
New Member
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 4
Am I crazy for trying?

Hello everyone! So I am an 18 year old living in NY, I go to a community college. So 5 months ago (September 9th) I met this girl who is a senior in high school who lives in Tennessee. We met online and have been talking non stop ever since. We skype whenever we can, we text, Snapchat etc. we have become super close, the closest Iíve ever been to a girl honestly and itís an amazing feeling knowing I can literally tell her anything. So our big ol plan is to meet in July. Everything has been going good so far, ups and down of course and as i said in another post she is going on a trip with boys in May and thatís gonna be a challenge I am gonna have to deal with, but getting back to my main point. We plan to meet in July, after that she will be going to college, we plan on doing trips back and fourth during college and eventually after one year of her at college I would transfer to her school. So the whole plan is in a year and a half to transfer to her college. Now I know I have not met her in real life but or ďemotionalĒ connection is amazing, one that Iíve never experienced before. We support each other thru everything and get along really well. So is this whole plan too much? Am I crazy to even try?
Donohuek11 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 8th February 2018, 2:43 PM   #2
Established Member
d0nnivain's Avatar
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Northeastern USA
Posts: 27,575
It's not crazy to try. Love is about hope.

That said, slow down. You don't actually know this girl. You are also young so you don't have the life experience needed to make valid assessments.

Do keep talking to her. Make plans to meet but don't be secretive about it; make sure all the parents know where you are going. Be safe.

Unless you otherwise wanted to go to her college before you ever heard of her don't transfer schools just for her. Go there if it's your dream but not for her. Go on your own educational path & then when you both graduate you can make plans to get jobs closer to each other.
d0nnivain is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 9th February 2018, 4:35 AM   #3
Established Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 10,341
I agree with d0nnivain's advice.

It's easy to get swept up in the fantasy of someone, but until you have spent time together in person, you are getting ahead of yourself.
ExpatInItaly is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11th February 2018, 7:45 PM   #4
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 16
I've been in a similar situation. What I've learned from my experience is you can never drop everything and pursue her, because if things don't work out (like in my case, roughly after a year of moving countries) you could be back to square one, maybe even more if the whole college thing doesn't work either.

1.) Get to physically know the girl first. In my case she was physically abusive (you don't know about that online). See how she handles arguments in person
2.) Spend quality time together months after the honeymoon period (I'm guessing we could call her your gf? if so she is probably your first. In that case you most likely lack the knowledge what exactly to expect.
3.) Love is blind, you will cross deserts and move mountains for her, but if there's anything to consider from what I have said, PLEASE only invest as much as she invests back. That means 50/50.
4.) Not to frighten you, but **** does happen in college, especially when you are in a LDR (I'll leave that part up to your imagination)

Should you move for her? First ask her if she's willing to move states for you just to test the waters. In my opinion you should only enrol there if it truly interests you (90%) and the other (10%) is a bonus, which is the girl.

You're not crazy, just loveblind like a year ago me.

Best of luck
lovecanbeharsh is offline   Reply With Quote


Thread Tools
Display Modes


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Crazy crazy crazy about him!!! Should I make a move? JennyGreen General Relationship Discussion 7 19th October 2014 7:15 PM
Crazy Ex/Crazy Me/Anxiety/Insecurity/GIGS/Avoidence/One great big mess -WHAT?! tipsyleprachauns Breaks and Breaking Up 11 21st February 2012 7:53 AM
crazy situation.. but love is crazy sometimes rite?? jamiedd Breaks and Breaking Up 1 17th November 2010 6:18 AM
Girls may be crazy....but boys are stupid.....and I'm pretty sure they made us crazy. North Shore Breaks and Breaking Up 14 8th May 2005 5:46 PM
CRAZY UPDATE to my crazy situation with dumper ex! What the hell!?!?! Forget About Her Second Chances 1 2nd April 2005 4:33 PM

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 11:11 PM.

Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.

Copyright © 1997-2018 All Rights Reserved.