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Some experience ?

Long-Distance Relationships Coping with geographical distance can make or break a LDR. Share your experiences and questions here.

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Old 24th December 2016, 7:21 PM   #1
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Some experience ?

Merry Christmas everyone

I split up with my b/f in July, we'd been together a couple of years, which I know isn't long but, honestly it felt more 'right' than any of my previous longer lasting relationships. We never once argued and whilst we lived a hour away from one another, the distance never appeared to be an issue.
I really thought this guy was the real deal - he had some issues, depression, anxiety - but he was out of therapy and seemingly doing well, it was never an issue in our relationship, he was the man of my dreams and every day he told me how much he loved me. Everyone around us thought we were the perfect couple.

I was shocked when he started acting distant, it really hurt and when I called him out on it via text, our relationship ended abruptly. I really tried to reconcile but all I got was blame and the silent treatment, which really pissed me off! I really don't know where things went wrong, or why he was unable to even speak to me or meet me, if only to end things decently if that's what he wanted (he said it was all down to me, things I had said, and 'turning on him? I made it clear I loved him very much I don't know where he got that from)

Instead I was ghosted, blocked everywhere practically overnight, let me tell you, I've never felt so worthless and guilty for nothing in my life, it was a real head bender. Every time I tried to contact him there was nothing, either ignored, told I was being abusive or that he was in a bad place...until every line of communication had been severed.

So I'm suffering spending my days crying my eyes out, not being able to get out of bed, loosing weight, trying desperately to find that closure within myself. While he's met someone else, within a month of our split they're in a 'Facebook relationship' .... ouch! They're doing the things we used to do and even having the same inside jokes we had... who does that??!

Three months later - they're engaged.

Wth is this? Who does this kinda thing? Any insight would be appreciated!

Last edited by Batteredheart; 24th December 2016 at 7:26 PM.. Reason: Mis spell
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Old 24th December 2016, 9:58 PM   #2
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OP, I don't know if this will sound like a similar situation.

When I was between my Junior and Senior years in high school, I dated a girl for three weeks.

I was 19, she was 15. She broke it off by having her BFF call me, regardless of the fact it was 2am and my father was sleeping. To cut it short. The culmination of the phone call was my gf's BFF telling me that my gf's 'real' bf had just been released from the county lockup. Then getting my gf to admit it.

So instead of finding someone new immediately. It was that they had someone waiting all along.

I don't know if you feel used. But I certainly did.
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Old 30th December 2016, 5:51 AM   #3
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Originally Posted by Batteredheart View Post
Merry Christmas everyone
Happy holidays to you

Originally Posted by Batteredheart View Post
we lived a hour away from one another
An hour doesn't qualify as long distance.

Originally Posted by Batteredheart View Post
he said it was all down to me, things I had said, and 'turning on him?
At times partners are clueless when causing pain, discomfort, grief, disappoinment, etc.
You still are. Whatever it was, it was insanable to him. Love was not strong enough to continue the relationship. That's what happened, and you should treat it that way. Things were perfect for you but not for him. Time will tell if his new relationship is one that will work for him long term.
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