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I meet a girl online...


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Hello, i meet this girl on an online video-game, in june... We started to talk everyday after school... then we went to holidays, we talked practically all day, since we waked up to the moment we went to bed. I really like her, and i think that she like me too [good friends, very good friends], and sometimes we get discussions, 20th of September we had a fight, she sounded really mad with me so she stopped talking to me, i accepted and didn't bother her... till now she dont answer me, she didn't ignored me, but she don't answer me. Today she was playing i send her a message in the game, she didn't answer me... CAN SOMEONE HELP ME ? Thursday is her birthday, i thought about send her a video of me ^^ but i don't know what to say... i really like her :( im dying for more than a week. HELP PLEASE :(

 

PS. Sorry for my english.

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There's nothing like getting mad and he doesn't care. You were the one who didn't care. I don't know what the argument was about. But regardless, you could have shown some concern about her being mad and tried to make up right away. That didn't happen. Next big mistake you could make would be contacting her as if nothing ever happened. So I guess you can try to show how you regret not acknowledging how she felt, say sorry if you mean it... and see what happens. You can make the video, but remember that you're just friends (if she still is your friend).

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There's nothing like getting mad and he doesn't care. You were the one who didn't care. I don't know what the argument was about. But regardless, you could have shown some concern about her being mad and tried to make up right away. That didn't happen. Next big mistake you could make would be contacting her as if nothing ever happened. So I guess you can try to show how you regret not acknowledging how she felt, say sorry if you mean it... and see what happens. You can make the video, but remember that you're just friends (if she still is your friend).

 

But i care, like alot!! I give her space, i know her and she sometimes wants it... and like 2 hour later i talked to her but she didnt answer me. I already sent her so many apologies ! I talk to her everyday, i think she sees what i write but she dont answer. My hearth is allways crushed because i don't want to lose her, as a friend, for nothing in this world...

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
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I met my boyfriend in an online game too and went through a fight in some of the months of the beginning, and well, after a month he contacted me again and slowly started to talk again, now we know each other irl :) (after years ofc)

For us to help you better you need to tell us what caused the discussion. Girls on videogames are some kind of ergh, delicated thing sometimes... because they can be just too normal or feel too "special". From our perspective, as we may be so few in online games, it's hard to find someone that doesn't appear like super interested in you because you are a girl. Have you started to talk to her uniterestedly or because you found her atractive? Maybe what you are doing now annoys her more than letting her have some mercy. Did she block you? If not it could mean that she still is trying to "apologize" (not sure what you two did) or she's enjoying it maybe (hey it could happen). Do you have friends in common whom you could ask what's happening?

But really need the reason why you had a fight. For the moment, stay serious, let her think about, if she misses you, she will be back for sure.

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I met my boyfriend in an online game too and went through a fight in some of the months of the beginning, and well, after a month he contacted me again and slowly started to talk again, now we know each other irl :) (after years ofc)

For us to help you better you need to tell us what caused the discussion. Girls on videogames are some kind of ergh, delicated thing sometimes... because they can be just too normal or feel too "special". From our perspective, as we may be so few in online games, it's hard to find someone that doesn't appear like super interested in you because you are a girl. Have you started to talk to her uniterestedly or because you found her atractive? Maybe what you are doing now annoys her more than letting her have some mercy. Did she block you? If not it could mean that she still is trying to "apologize" (not sure what you two did) or she's enjoying it maybe (hey it could happen). Do you have friends in common whom you could ask what's happening?

But really need the reason why you had a fight. For the moment, stay serious, let her think about, if she misses you, she will be back for sure.

 

Hello... we meet on LoL, we were on the same team and in that day i was mad because Portugal [im portuguese she's german] lost against Germany 4-0 and i asked where are they team from she said germany... i was teasing with her but carefully cuz its a girl, not because i wanted to meet her or anything but its common sense, you don't talk to girls like you talk to guys [Guys perspective] and in the end of the game she added me... i was surprised but i accepted and we started talking, a week or 2 weeks later i started to wondering how she looked like, she said this : "i'm afraid of showing myself cuz im not pretty" not in that words but thats the message. i didnt care and still don't... all this to say : i don't add her just because she is a girl she added me , and to say that i dont talk to her because she is pretty. Moving on... no she didn't blocked me, i got her as a friend in facebook, skype, in LoL and in steam... she didnt blocked, yet --. No we don't have friends in common, i know just 1 friend of her but she don't like me and probably wont help me... [PS. Sorry for my bad english]

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Still why did you two fight? Unless you said it and I understood that it was part of how you met with the 4-0. For the moment as I told you, let her be and wait. And don't even think of sending her a video of you for her b-day. It's just personal opinion, I was like her, afraid of what he could think of my appearance, but also a video like that would kind of... scare me a lot lol, specially if it's been only months since you two met. It's a good signal that she didn't block you, that way, even if you don't try to talk much to her, maybe it's good to demonstrate that you still think about her (in case she does the same about you and doesn't think that you will start your life apart like nothing happened). Just let her head get cold a little, don't show yourself with much despair. Just want you to know that you can have a good relationship online, but respect her wants and needs :)

PS: my english sucks too ;P

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Still why did you two fight? Unless you said it and I understood that it was part of how you met with the 4-0. For the moment as I told you, let her be and wait. And don't even think of sending her a video of you for her b-day. It's just personal opinion, I was like her, afraid of what he could think of my appearance, but also a video like that would kind of... scare me a lot lol, specially if it's been only months since you two met. It's a good signal that she didn't block you, that way, even if you don't try to talk much to her, maybe it's good to demonstrate that you still think about her (in case she does the same about you and doesn't think that you will start your life apart like nothing happened). Just let her head get cold a little, don't show yourself with much despair. Just want you to know that you can have a good relationship online, but respect her wants and needs :)

PS: my english sucks too ;P

 

Im sorry, but i can't tell you the reason of the fight, and no... the 4-0 is not the reason, that subject is dead long time ago :S im a little embarrassed about that... You really got a point in that thing with the video! I wont do it, but it is a special day, i can't ignore it... Do you have any idea of how can i say : Hey i remembered and i wish you a HappyBirth day?

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Im sorry, but i can't tell you the reason of the fight, and no... the 4-0 is not the reason, that subject is dead long time ago :S im a little embarrassed about that... You really got a point in that thing with the video! I wont do it, but it is a special day, i can't ignore it... Do you have any idea of how can i say : Hey i remembered and i wish you a HappyBirth day?

 

I don't really know as I don't know many factors... If you knew her for a long time I would suggest mailing a gift, but it's too soon (and i don't know your economical situation either). If you are good economically, one easy thing you could do is gift her something on steam (you can check her wishlist, specially her fauvorite genre, and if it's exspesive for you, check the russian pricing and find a good trader ;) ) or either gift her something on LoL. You have some kind of a nice ammount of diferencies culturally, so that makes it hard. If you are going to send her a message do it privately and not where anybody else can see it. She will be more cheered up that any other day so take advantage of that to say what you feel (hey don't go further but let her know that you appreciate her and you don't want to lose her companionship)

 

Don't take my advice too seriously, I try to help since I feel identified but can't do much with little info-

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I don't really know as I don't know many factors... If you knew her for a long time I would suggest mailing a gift, but it's too soon (and i don't know your economical situation either). If you are good economically, one easy thing you could do is gift her something on steam (you can check her wishlist, specially her fauvorite genre, and if it's exspesive for you, check the russian pricing and find a good trader ;) ) or either gift her something on LoL. You have some kind of a nice ammount of diferencies culturally, so that makes it hard. If you are going to send her a message do it privately and not where anybody else can see it. She will be more cheered up that any other day so take advantage of that to say what you feel (hey don't go further but let her know that you appreciate her and you don't want to lose her companionship)

 

Don't take my advice too seriously, I try to help since I feel identified but can't do much with little info-

 

Thank you, I will give her a steam game i think :D thank you... I will follow your advices because you sound a little like her, I noticed that by the way you talk... and explain to me that sentence : "If you are going to send her a message do it privately and not where anybody else can see it", I didn't understood, we allways speak in private ^^ Thank you soo much... After i sent this message i went to LoL and she wasnt in my friends anymore :'( I searched her name and it was not found... So she removed me and change her name... So this mean she blocked me from her life :'( do you think i should get her the gift anyway ? Help me please [imagine if ur boyfriend, I HOPE NOT DONT TAKE ME WRONG, blocked you and didn't said anything to you... like "i don't care about you anymore..." you would have your heart crushed, and this is not about that fight, if it is she don't cared a bit with me, i don't wish this to nobody] I never meet and I never will met anyone SO SPECIAL as her :'( help me

 

PS. If you want to know the reason of the fight i wont do it here, in the forum.

PS. She only blocked me in LoL, we still "friends" in Steam [for the moment, because she dont go online in steam for 5 days] and in Facebook, Skype i got her but she probably blocked me too and skype don't change anything to know that... I lost the most amazing girl of my life didn't I [im crying so hard right now]?

Edited by w11gu
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I think I will give her the gift anyway, right now I really don't care about the money. I just need to talk to her again. Do you support me in this ? Please answer, I want to know if I got your approval... Its like, she's so special to me that I can't loser her right ?

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Well sorry on the change of name thing... kind of changes the situation. Take into account you can't buy her apologies with a gift, it's only a reminder that you care, don't take it wrong.

When we fought neither of us blocked each other, but 2 weeks passed till we started to talk again. A friend of mine went through the same but after apologies long after, it finished on nothing.

Try to not stick so much emotionally to her, i know it's hard, i know you can get deeply in love, but you can't force someone to be with you either, besides that you know her from only months and it's internet. The only thing i would think as i said before is let her cold... hopefully before she doesn't block you, or if you think time passes and her wounds don't cure, you can try writing a letter-like text to send her, but not too soon, i mean try not to be so insisting.

By private was just a little detail... because feels more direct and exclusive than writing something on any of her profiles, just saying, because some would do that and it's not so good (to my eyes)

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Well sorry on the change of name thing... kind of changes the situation. Take into account you can't buy her apologies with a gift, it's only a reminder that you care, don't take it wrong.

When we fought neither of us blocked each other, but 2 weeks passed till we started to talk again. A friend of mine went through the same but after apologies long after, it finished on nothing.

Try to not stick so much emotionally to her, i know it's hard, i know you can get deeply in love, but you can't force someone to be with you either, besides that you know her from only months and it's internet. The only thing i would think as i said before is let her cold... hopefully before she doesn't block you, or if you think time passes and her wounds don't cure, you can try writing a letter-like text to send her, but not too soon, i mean try not to be so insisting.

By private was just a little detail... because feels more direct and exclusive than writing something on any of her profiles, just saying, because some would do that and it's not so good (to my eyes)

 

I'm sry for the spam, and for being annoying. Its just I'm desperate, and the worst of all its the way she did it... After the summer [1 of the best summers of my life, i think she can't regret], after all we've been through, the summer was so special [for both of us, i think] how can she do this so easly ?

You know what happened yesterday ? Remember the guy that was her friend and don't like me ? Yesterday, i changed my status to "Why ? :(" He asked me : "Whats wrong ?" Like : "ahahaha f*ck you, she blocked you..." I talked it cool, said that i lost my phone and I was friendly to him... he didn't answered me anymore...

Do you think i should give her the gift to have 1 last talk to her ? Do you think that i should just simply send her 1 message ? Do you think i should ignore her b-day and her for a while [even knowing that i can't] ?

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I said this to her in facebook : "Happy Birthday I wish you a day as special as you. I will wait for my friend Songbird as long as it takes [cuz right now you are not her], when you want to talk you can add me back, i wont bother you any longer. Happy Birthday ^^

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lOhAnuPtduU This is so cool hope you like... ok now im gonna shut ^^ Happy birthday"

Do you think I screwed up ? or nailed it?

Well I know the reason why her friend don't like me a bit... I think they are in a relationship, or at least he likes her... Is there any chance that he was the reason of this? He never liked me .

 

PS. You don't know the feeling i had when i was sending her that message... I was in the clouds... i forgot about all this, it was like it never happened. But i can't tell her that i feel this way for her :( its funny, because everytime i think how i met her it was the destiny... if I had done something different in my life i would not found her in that game. This is only a lesson? God gave me the best summer ever just to get hurted in the end of it ? I think i don't deserve this :(

Edited by w11gu
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She saw my message today, she didn't answer but she didn't blocked me niether ^^ all i have to do is way isnt it ?

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Wait* ^^ I have a good feeling about the future:love:, I don't know why . I'm afraid of getting disappointed. Well, I will never forget her, so I need to wait and hope that to be quick. But Kimiky if I get tired in the future to wait, can i contact you, here in the forum, to ask you for your opinion? I hope it does not come to that.

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all i have to do is wait isnt it ?

1) Don't start stalking her now.

2) Wait some time before attempting to get in touch with her again. As I guess she might not reach out to you, you'll have to try again in a while. Maybe let a week go by.

3) Avoid sentences like "right now you are not her". I know you mean well, but it might just make thing things harsher between you two, and make any reconnection harder for you. So it's just turning against you like a boomerang.

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This is so cool hope you like... ok now im gonna shut ^^ Happy birthday"

Do you think I screwed up ? or nailed it?

It looks too childish for my taste, but well, I'm older. Also, when someone's special to you, everything coming from him is special...... so it all depends on how she's seeing you. That can make a big difference in the way she perceives anything coming from you. If you're annoying to her right now, then whatever you send her might be annoying.

 

Did you mean "shut" or "shout"?

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It looks too childish for my taste, but well, I'm older. Also, when someone's special to you, everything coming from him is special...... so it all depends on how she's seeing you. That can make a big difference in the way she perceives anything coming from you. If you're annoying to her right now, then whatever you send her might be annoying.

 

Did you mean "shut" or "shout"?

 

I mean shut. I don't talk to her since she blocked me, 2 weeks and somedays ago. And btw she blocked me on Steam too... so I'm waiting for the day she will block me in Facebook too... What should I do if she block me too ? Should I react or just ignore her ?

 

PS. I can't ignore her... She's, she's, she's too important for me.

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She definitely closed the door, but she still has the spy-hole (FB) ready to use, in case she wanted to use it. The problem is you can't see when the person is behind the spy-hole watching. So just assume she can do that whenever. Also, you seldom open the door after using the spy-hole. People are generally very cautious. So don't expect her to get back in touch with you on a whim. Use FB for subtle subliminal messages to her. Don't mess around. Don't compliment girls here and there, liking bikini pics and that kind of stuff. If you want to have a chance again, just behave. Don't post pics of you and other girls, or you getting drunk and that kind of stuff. Give it a month or two and see what happens.

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She definitely closed the door, but she still has the spy-hole (FB) ready to use, in case she wanted to use it. The problem is you can't see when the person is behind the spy-hole watching. So just assume she can do that whenever. Also, you seldom open the door after using the spy-hole. People are generally very cautious. So don't expect her to get back in touch with you on a whim. Use FB for subtle subliminal messages to her. Don't mess around. Don't compliment girls here and there, liking bikini pics and that kind of stuff. If you want to have a chance again, just behave. Don't post pics of you and other girls, or you getting drunk and that kind of stuff. Give it a month or two and see what happens.

 

I don't understand why she didn't block me in facebook too... but she can do it any moment.

So you think that I need to be low profile, I get it but I didn't understood this sentence : "Use FB for subtle subliminal messages to her." Can you explain yourself... isn't better to give her space to think ? On the other hand if I don't talk to her, if I just let her go that can a sign that I don't care or that I forget her... FCK Why girls do this? Why are they so complicated. Why am I so stupid to get to the point of liking a girl who can erase from her life in a minute. Fck this hurt so much.

 

PS. sry about that I need to talk to someone or I'll get even more depressed.

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I don't understand why she didn't block me in facebook too
I just told you. She kept the spy-hole in the door, though the door is shut.

 

I didn't understood this sentence : "Use FB for subtle subliminal messages to her."
It means don't contact her for the moment. Just post meaningful posts that contain wisdom and inspirational stuff that might be related to her and your feelings for her, without making it too obvious. If it's too difficult, don't do anything.

 

if I don't talk to her, if I just let her go that can a sign that I don't care or that I forget her...
If he sees you seriously affected by the loss, a reconnection might be feasible later on.

 

FCK Why girls do this?
Hard to tell not knowing what triggered the behavior. But usually, there's always a cause for a consequence.

 

Why are they so complicated.
I disagree. They just usually put more thought whatever they do.

 

Why am I so stupid to get to the point of liking a girl who can erase from her life in a minute.
Only you can answer that. Also, you never even met her. What are you expecting out of this? If it's just to reconnect with a good friend, then try the above.
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1º - Thank you for your tips and for being realistic with me.

2º - We never really talked by facebook. we are "friends" on facebook because it was one way to know for those who were talking, that 1/2 weeks after we met.

3º - I think make meaningful posts will not help, she's not the girl that are allways on facebook, or posts on facebook, she's not a facebook addicted, far from it. She barely go to facebook, i think...

4º - Girls are complicated, guys need to think 5 times before saying something, even if they are joking/teasing with them, because girls can see that as an ofensive sentence.

 

I got a question [a stupid one]. I got her friend added and lately we've been talking, not about her, but i know that he don't like me. Is it bad for me to continue to talk to him? he will probably tell her everything. Its bad because she can think that im trying to stalk her, but can be good because she can't remember me. I'm so bad with girls. Is that bad isnt it ? Should i stop talking to him too ?

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I think make meaningful posts will not help, she's not the girl that are allways on facebook, or posts on facebook, she's not a facebook addicted, far from it. She barely go to facebook, i think...
Maybe she would just look at your timeline now and then. But OK. Skip this. It's not for you.

 

Is it bad for me to continue to talk to him?
Don't get personal, keep it light. And no more than 20 minutes a week. You'll be fine.

 

she can think that im trying to stalk her, but can be good because she can't remember me.
What? What does this all mean?

 

I'm so bad with girls. Is that bad isnt it ?
I never heard a man say "I'm so good with girls". So I think both statements are just useless.

 

Should i stop talking to him too ?
It makes no difference as I see it. Edited by justwhoiam
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I wanted to say : "but can be good because she CAN remember me."

 

And what do you mean with this : " Skip this. It's not for you." ?

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Sorry, but justwhoiam took the handle better than anyone ;P

You may be just having bad thoughts, or be right about that guy. Does he live closer to her? Is he older than you and is he a nice player? It happened to me to be more closer to those guys who showed being more mature, good players, and even more if we shared country. Perhaps that has something to do with her desition of not getting back to you.

 

She won't forget you, one almost never does with people they meet online and had a good time together, I happened to have fights with lots of people on mmos, however, although we deleted each other from FB, we got to re-add each other (hell even after years) and be like nothing ever happened.

 

I just beg you not to talk to her anymore, she won't think you forgot her, she will understand that you gave her space, and it will be better than sending her messages once a week or so. The only thing you have to do to keep this fine, as justwhoiam said, is not showing interest in other girls, but remaining active on facebook, as it's the only place were she can see you. While this happens, maybe you will heal a little from missing her.

 

Remember there won't be happy endings always... The happines you had while you talked to her will never banish, but if she doesn't want to keep with it it should be for a reason. Who knows, it can happen that she finishes not getting along with the other guy, or realizes that she doesn't find some attitudes worthy, and she comes back to you some day.

Edited by kimiky
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