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2 years long distance... is it worth it?

Long-Distance Relationships Coping with geographical distance can make or break a LDR. Share your experiences and questions here.

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Old 8th April 2014, 3:49 PM   #1
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2 years long distance... is it worth it?

My boyfriend and I started dating my senior year of highschool. I know that a lot of people say its a bad idea to continue relationships from high-school through college but that's exactly what we did. I moved to a college that was 10 hours away and we have been in a long-distance relationship ever since. The first year was definitely the hardest, I counted down every single day until I got to see him again and didn't really live my life. Its not like I regretted this decision now, but I am definitely living more than before. Our relationship through all of this has had its ups and downs. Some days I feel like he is insanely immature and makes me so mad... but then there are the other days where I feel like total crap and he makes me smile and laugh and feel great. I'm being told that worrying about a relationship with someone else will prevent myself from finding out who I am... I honestly don't know where I would be during my most stressful times without him. The good thing is that once this school year is over we will be halfway through our long-distance period... if we have made it this far we can for sure make it through the rest? The thing I am so scared of is if we do make it through but then end up breaking up... What would all of this been for? Not to mention next semester he is transferring to one of the biggest party schools in our home state... It's not that I don't trust him.. I am just afraid of how our communication will become less and less. Thanks to anyone who read through all of this...
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Old 8th April 2014, 9:44 PM   #2
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Originally Posted by achamb7 View Post
...Not to mention next semester he is transferring to one of the biggest party schools in our home state... It's not that I don't trust him.. I am just afraid of how our communication will become less and less.

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Old 9th April 2014, 12:24 PM   #3
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I agree with TMichaels on this. You should really talk to him if that is going to bother you. And to answer your question about whether or not the relationship was worth having. If you all broke up that doesn't mean the relationship was a big waste of time at all. Both you and your boyfriend probably have grown a lot from being in a relationship together. Talk with your boyfriend about this then get back to us if you still feel like you need help understanding what's going on.
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Old 10th April 2014, 6:35 PM   #4
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I went through a relationship just like this. We discussed the very same fear that we would be busy once we hit 4th year. Other things came up and tore us apart, with trust issues popping up. We also grew at different rates, and insecurities made the relationship very toxic.

I don't know if this is conventional wisdom, but I wished I hadn't continued the relationship with my ex, and tried finding myself. That way, we would have had a mutual breakup that would have been momentarily painful but leaving the door open with a good note (i.e. high school sweetheart).

I had a lot of ambition and dreams that vanished because I was too afraid to let go. Long-distance relationships are hard, and if you are serious about this individual... now is not the right time for a serious relationship. It gets easier once you are more established.

I'm sure my ex and I would have made an excellent couple, but in another universe.

Just my $0.02.
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Old 14th April 2014, 11:54 PM   #5
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That's the problem, I have voiced my concerns about the decrease in communication, but so far there hasn't seem to be any effort put forward to change anything, and with summer coming up and distance no longer being an issue I feel as though it is just going to be pushed to the side until the fall term arrives
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