Jump to content

Tears And Long Distance Relationship ?


Recommended Posts

Feel like being honest guys.

How often did this situation made you cry because you missed them so bad?

Did you share this with them or its smarter to keep it quiet for pride sake or not to drag them down with you.

But no matter how I think of it man tolerate this better then us or lie trough their teeth about it ...

Link to post
Share on other sites
Freshstart637

First ldr for me and was always against ldr. It sucks when I miss her a lot. I share it with her and she seems to understand. Last time I saw her was 3 weeks ago and in 5 months she will be living with me. I do hope it gets easier as time goes by.

 

Good luck!

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Thats wonderfull news am so happy for you both : )))

Yes sharing works but at times its tough to share when they are happy and upbeat and all you feel is down and gloom.

Link to post
Share on other sites
january2011

I cry at the airport, when I leave, and sometimes before I even get to the airport. I also cry during our first Skype call when I get home.

 

We tell each other when we miss each other, but we don't cry. We've agreed not to hold back our feelings, especially not about each other.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Now that part sucks royally it makes me wanna tear up just thinking about it how did we ever got so brave to do this.

So far I caught him tearing up only twice both it broke my heart both times ...

Link to post
Share on other sites

I've never really cried about missing him. I mean, I miss him a lot and at times I do feel the pain... And so does he. It's visible that we're sad but we tell each other it's temporary. but I try not to think about that. We talk constantly and we see each other fairly often for LDR (every 3-5 weeks and sometimes we get to see each other 2 weekends in a row or with only one weekend apart). We are a plane ride away and no other way to get together, but I try my best to be happy about what we have. I do have my moments of feeling down, but don't cry. We're still a good year away from living together. But knowing that we will be spending the rest of our lives together eventually makes it much more bearable.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Well am also glad to hear that and yes In a way I get it.

But its more then just missing them its about missing some moments and things and days when they can't be there both happy and sad.

I wish you just that then : )))) may the year goes really fast for you ...

Link to post
Share on other sites
Feel like being honest guys.

How often did this situation made you cry because you missed them so bad?

Did you share this with them or its smarter to keep it quiet for pride sake or not to drag them down with you.

But no matter how I think of it man tolerate this better then us or lie trough their teeth about it ...

 

I cry once or twice a month because I'm so fed up with everything and because I feel lonely. I don't have that many friends where I am right now so missing him can get extremely hard. However, I try not to be too clingy or dependent on him so try to keep myself busy.

Just last night I cried because I missed him and I always tell him when I do. We don't hide our feelings from each other. I understand your point of not wanting to drag the other person down and I always do try to hide it but I never succeed. On a bad day, as soon as we skype I can no longer put a brave face on and usually burst into tears.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
I cry once or twice a month because I'm so fed up with everything and because I feel lonely. I don't have that many friends where I am right now so missing him can get extremely hard. However, I try not to be too clingy or dependent on him so try to keep myself busy.

Just last night I cried because I missed him and I always tell him when I do. We don't hide our feelings from each other. I understand your point of not wanting to drag the other person down and I always do try to hide it but I never succeed. On a bad day, as soon as we skype I can no longer put a brave face on and usually burst into tears.

 

HUGS

Yes I know those bad days after arguments even more so.

Besides its really hard even for friends to get these kinds of relationships which can prove aditional reason for stress and saddnes.

Don't worry doll I managed to drag him down once or twice as well it happens so far we got over every time altough at some times I wonder how in the name of all holly we did manage to do so ....

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
How often did this situation made you cry because you missed them so bad?
Never for that reason. I don't think I would cry because of that. I did for the following reasons:

- deeply hurt (e.g. for an argument)

- feeling powerless (e.g. for a breakup or thinking he doesn't love me anymore)

 

Did you share this with them or its smarter to keep it quiet for pride sake or not to drag them down with you.
I used not to tell him, then it got to a point that I felt he had to know.

 

But no matter how I think of it man tolerate this better then us or lie trough their teeth about it ...
He's been sad about me being far away... but not to the point of crying. He was almost in tears (a couple of times I guess), but for other reasons. Once that happened while I was with him.
Link to post
Share on other sites
I cry at the airport, when I leave, and sometimes before I even get to the airport.
I've never cried at the airport. There's this thing deep down about parting from each other, but I remember smiling & kissing & hugging, and trying to make the best of the last moments with him. Same for him. Though he's usually more sad than I am. So it seems. I think I am generally slow tuned, which means it takes time for me to really assimilate the separation. It starts after a while when I'm home. There's also the elation of being with him, and it stays with me on the plane thinking of all our good memories...
Link to post
Share on other sites
adamaiden844

Long distance relationships are not working now a days, its really hard to manage it or have believe on your partner in long distance relations. You can't even figure it out they can just be in touch with mobiles and internet but its not enough for a strong relationship.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
Sigh .... :(

Yes we are muddling trough talking more into detail about "changes" and visits and stuff but its stil LDR and it still sucks big time.

We did tough almost break up for good few times but made up soon or right away kind of like can't be us and can't stay away either.

Now things are being better he "hears" better tries more so we shall see.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
PepperPotts

I do cry some, but I try not to let him know. It generally comes out when something major happens (i.e. death of a mutual friend, terrorism on the news, a really bad day, etc.). I openly cry at the airport, and when it's almost time to leave, and he understands. But when we're apart, I try to limit the "I miss yous." I do this for two reasons:

 

1. I find that saying it out loud reminds him that he misses me too, and causes him to feel the way I do. I try, as you put it, not to "drag him down" with me.

 

2. I have found that he sometimes interprets "I miss you" as "you're not doing enough to keep this LDR going, or I *wouldn't* miss you so badly because I wouldn't feel like you were gone." And then he doesn't think he's making me happy, and bad feelings abound.

 

We try to focus on the positives-- it's getting closer and closer to the next time we see each other (this time we close the distance!), we still love each other, we still make each other happy, and we get to talk to each other almost every day, even though we aren't physically close. A hundred years ago, a relationship like ours would have had to rely on letters alone. No nightly phone calls, no Skype, no texts. We could have it so much worse, and we soon will have it so much better. That's what makes it worth fighting for.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Well am also glad to hear that and yes In a way I get it.

But its more then just missing them its about missing some moments and things and days when they can't be there both happy and sad.

I wish you just that then : )))) may the year goes really fast for you ...

 

I'm going to clarify... I have cried in front of my boyfriend before. I had a rough couple of weeks a few months ago and I was taking on a lot of stress: work, health, family, etc. And one morning, he skypes me and I just start to cry. It's nothing different from how I would be if we were together, but it's human. I think he appreciates when I am vulnerable like that because he really feels that I trust him. I tend to suppress a lot of my issues in public and he's the only one I feel safe to break down in front of. We talk it through and he gives me support and it helps me move on.

 

I think not trying to drag on how tough it is to be in a LDR and cry often about it can become unhealthy. However, for day to day things that affect you, it's OK to lean on your love.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I just don't know how you LDR people do it. I admire the commitment, courage, but man, so difficult.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
HeavenOrHell

Uhm says who?!

Some work, some don't, same as local r/ships.

LDR's can often mean a lot more effort, time, commitment, trust, perseverance than local r/ships, which means the r/ship is actually very strong.

I've no idea if I'll be with my partner forever, but if we split up now it doesn't mean our r/ship wasn't strong enough for the last 3 years, on the contrary the times I've thought about leaving him are because I feel too strongly about him to bear it anymore, and neither of us can move, nothing at all do with not being a 'strong' r/ship.

 

 

Long distance relationships are not working now a days, its really hard to manage it or have believe on your partner in long distance relations. You can't even figure it out they can just be in touch with mobiles and internet but its not enough for a strong relationship.
Link to post
Share on other sites
HeavenOrHell

I don't cry much over missing him, only cried once when we hugged goodbye, two visits ago.

I usually feel happy from seeing him and on a high from that.

I start feeling low after a few days, or after a week or two, after visits sometimes, but haven't done the last few months as I feel so close to him and communication is frequent, so he doesn't seem too far away.

I cry with loneliness sometimes, but this is more to do with having been in a r/ship for two decades and have never really adjusted to living alone, I don't like it.

If I start to miss my partner I put up barriers so I don't let myself feel it.

Sometimes I tell him I miss him, but I keep it light hearted. No idea if he misses me or not, he doesn't talk about feelings, he only used to express things like that in the first year we were together.

 

 

 

Feel like being honest guys.

How often did this situation made you cry because you missed them so bad?

Did you share this with them or its smarter to keep it quiet for pride sake or not to drag them down with you.

But no matter how I think of it man tolerate this better then us or lie trough their teeth about it ...

Link to post
Share on other sites
Feel like being honest guys.

How often did this situation made you cry because you missed them so bad?

Did you share this with them or its smarter to keep it quiet for pride sake or not to drag them down with you.

But no matter how I think of it man tolerate this better then us or lie trough their teeth about it ...

 

I told her. It even happened, while I was on the phone with her. She was very touched.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
I told her. It even happened, while I was on the phone with her. She was very touched.

 

Awww that is so sweet

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...