My LDR bf doesn't care that I'm sick?

[ohnoo]

I've been in an LDR relationship with a busy movie producer for almost 2 months. He's 34 and I'm 28.

 

I sent him a video of me at the beach yesterday morning and he replied at night with "Pretty ;)". Didn't even ask who I'm with or whatever. And I can see when he reads my message (we use Kakaotalk). He read it in the morning but replied at night. I replied to him that I got sick, I can see that he read my message a minute after I sent it. No reply. So I asked what he's doing, he read it again after a minute. Still no reply until now. It's been a day.

 

Didn't even ask how I am or a simple "Hope you feel better soon.". Is this worth breaking up? I have a project with him and I'm thinking of breaking up after I get my payment. I already know that he's busy but will it hurt him to send a simple message of concern? He has time to read my messages, couldn't even spare 10 seconds to reply? I'm thinking of sending him a sarcastic thanks for the concern or something like "Will you show concern if I told you it's cancer?". Am I being unreasonable or reading too much into this? I feel that he's just sending me messages when it's work-related or at his convenience.

 

EDIT:

 

He just messaged with "How are you feeling today? ;)". I'm still pissed, it took him a day to reply.

Edited March 21, 2013 by ohnoo

[LittleTiger]

ohnoo, when you say you have been in an LDR with a busy movie producer, do you mean a real life relationship? Have you actually met him yet?

 

If not, I would sincerely doubt that he is actually a movie producer and, even if he is, his actions show he has little inclination to make time to fit you into his schedule.

 

Move on - you deserve better!

[CherryT]

I won't even touch the cancer comment, because to compare and to push that into someone's face is a little... i don't know.

 

If he doesn't give a cr*p when it's something small what makes you think he'll care at something big? Your shock value approach doesn't work when someone just isn't that into you or the relationship. You're expecting him to be your knight and shining armour and maybe that's just not in him to give. If it's fizzling out after only 2 months, there really isn't a foundation to keep it going. I don't know why women stick around when they feel unloved or the man is making little effort... you can simply say "It sounds like you're too busy to have a relationship. That's OK, this is what I'm looking for and it just doesn't seem like you're up for it. It's important for me to find a happy relationship so I'm going to do me and leave." and make your decision to leave and do it.

[FitChick]

If he's on location, he is working long days and totally focused on work. Most people in showbiz are self-absorbed which is why I don't date them any more. Lesson learned!

 

However, it's a small business and you might work with him again so don't burn any bridges, no matter how tempted you may be. I'd only reply when he contacts you first and don't initiate any communication. Then start dating someone else. Never mix business with pleasure!

[ohnoo]

@LittleTiger - Yes, he is my boss.

his actions show he has little inclination to make time to fit you into his schedule.

Seems like it.

 

 

@CherryT - I didn't do the cancer comment but I believe it will work. He'll know that I'm pissed off and he doesn't like that. His usual 'tough stoic guy' facade comes down when I'm mad. Actually, the thing you said about him being too busy to have a relationship, that was the line in my head if I decide to break-up.

 

@Mark Cassidy - We have feelings for each other and we are looking for ways to work and be together. When we met I had a boyfriend and he was determined to 'steal' me. Emotions are there. Just that I don't think anyone's too busy to tell his gf to get better, at least if he's really busy then don't show me that you've read the message, I felt like I was purposely ignored and that's hurtful. I'll talk to him when my anger/hurt subsides.

 

@FitChick - "Self-absorbed" true and you are correct, need to be civil especially since I'm in a much lower position. Although I don't know for how long I can do that. This working relationship really is crappy.

 

 

 

Thank you all, upon writing this he called me twice and I answered the second one and felt like crying so I hang-up. His excuse was that he was in a business meeting when I texted and he left his phone in the restaurant so he picked it up the next morning. I told him it's the reading and not replying part that I'm pissed about and I corrected him that it's not "missed" messages, it's "ignored" and I told him that I know when he reads it. He didn't know that it shows when messages were read! Then he said he only read it the following day and it's actually KakaoTalk's fault for showing that it was read when it's not. OH MY GOD. SO BULL****.

 

In the end, he apologized and told me he didn't mean to hurt me and to contact him if I feel better. I'm not gonna contact him (but for sure he'll contact me tomorrow).