sammyd Posted February 4, 2011 Share Posted February 4, 2011 Hi all, So, i've been messaging a guy for a year now, every day we speak, and i've kinda fallen for him. He knows that i like him, he says he likes me but we've never met, and so until that point we won't know if anything more will come of it. Now, we had a discussion, and we both have different views. Anyway, we agreed to kinda disagree i guess lol. There wasn't any argument or anything. Seems though, that he's pulled away from me a bit since. He still talks, but just seems a bit distant, i'm guessing because of the difference of opinion, although i could be wrong i guess. So, the question is, how do i proceed? I don't want to seem needy, (and i did kinda keep asking if all was ok earlier - he said yes, but i could sense something wasn't right). Is it best to wait for him to initiate contact now? Or shall i just pop up and say hi when he comes online? Help! Link to post Share on other sites
Nixx Posted February 4, 2011 Share Posted February 4, 2011 This sounds really familiar!! I do this allllll the time. And I think when things get a little intense or whatever...you feel the distance more. But if you still want to continue the discussion, maybe look at it from his perspective and say "hey, i thought about your opinion on such and such and I see what you mean....and blah blah blah". There is nothing wrong with agreeing to disagree. But it doesnt mean you cant understand eachother better. If he said that all was okay then you really need to believe him. I get into so much trouble not trusting what a guy says as what is said. I start picking apart every conversation...guessing what he meant by saying this or that...then sewing it all back together with my own conspiracy theories and paranoia that he hates me and never wants to talk to me ever again. You know...those fancy fun mind tricks that our brains love to create. So...do what you two normally do. Message eachother. Talk. Have discussions. Get to know eachother. You both already like eachother. And if you want things to move along..you need to continue doing just that. Even if it means disagreeing. You never know....maybe after getting to know eachother more you'll both start really REALLY liking eachother. haha. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sammyd Posted February 5, 2011 Author Share Posted February 5, 2011 ha! Yeah, Nixx, you're so right! I guess you become more sensitive because you don't have physical contact, so can't tell what they're thinking. Then u start making things up as to what they might be thinking! Anyway, it's ok, he came online as normal, and he said hi, and we sort of just carried on as normal! He may have just been tired or something. You sorta forget we all have days where we need to be a bit quieter:) Anyway, thanks for replying. it's nice to know i'm not the only one that feels like that sometimes! Link to post Share on other sites
folieadeux Posted February 5, 2011 Share Posted February 5, 2011 Sit down and have a chat with him; if he's no longer interested in the same relationship you are, then there really isn't any point in continuing. If he is and you think this is worth giving a go, plan a visit as soon as possible. It's the only way you'll be able to make any progress here. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sammyd Posted February 5, 2011 Author Share Posted February 5, 2011 Thanks Folieadeux, hopfully we'll be meeting come the Summer, problem is, he lives over the other side of the world, and money is tight for both of us at the moment, although, hopefully that will be changing soon:) Link to post Share on other sites
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