The light at the end of the tunnel is dim, ?

[chelle21689]

Hi, I'm new on here! My bf and I have been together 5 years but 2 years long distance. There were some points I thought it had made our relationship stronger, then I thought it was damaging, so it's been a emotional roller coaster! We see each other on average every 2.5 months...but right now I won't see him until Dec 27th .

 

Anyways, I'm going back to school for my bachelor's which will take just 2 years...maybe a little earlier (hopefully!). By then, my boyfriend should be back from his deployment. He's in the Army Reserve and is scheduled to deploy October 2011 for 7-9 months perhaps.

 

I planned to move after I graduate with my bachelor's degree and save up. He lives in Los Angeles so it's EXPENSIVE. The problem is, is that after his deployment there is a possibility of them sending him to Monterey, CA for language school which is 5-6 hours away for a year and then deploy again to some other country.

 

It isn't a 100% sure thing but this is what he was told. I don't want to move and be with him for a month and then be by myself for a year! I thought of my options..please help me choose IF HE does go to language school.

 

A. Don't move and just wait until his Army contract is over...which isn't until Spring 2015 lol

 

B. IF HE HAS A WHILE before being sent to language school...like a few months...move out there. Settle in dating him for the months we have together before he is sent out.. and have my own life and try to have visits twice a month or whatever works

 

We're still young. I'm 21 and he's 22. I'm not ready to marry until maybe another 4 years...I'm hoping by then he is ready too...if we're married then I can easily go to Monterey, CA where he is and not worry about bills much. He wants to marry one day but I'm not sure WHEN...I'm sort of guessing when he has financial stability..and not broke lol

[folieadeux]

Seems like the best thing to do here would be to wait seeing as he isn’t 100% sure of his plans yet either. I would suggest using this time to finish school and do what you want to do, while still maintaining the relationship as you have. Like you said, you guys are still young and want to wait to get married so you both have ample time to weight out which option would be best for you both. The last thing I’m sure you’d want to do is completely uproot your life only to be separated again.

 

I think it’s great that you guys have been able to stay together long distance for this long; it really speaks volumes as to the strength of your relationship.

[chelle21689]

I know...I'm thinking way too far ahead in the future worrying. Haha...thank you so much for your response though I really do appreciate it. I just hope we continue to do well because it's a challenge...sometimes when you're apart for so long and you argue...you forget what it's like together until you meet again.

[folieadeux]

I know...I'm thinking way too far ahead in the future worrying. Haha...thank you so much for your response though I really do appreciate it. I just hope we continue to do well because it's a challenge...sometimes when you're apart for so long and you argue...you forget what it's like together until you meet again.

 

Not a problem; it's definately worth planning ahead and thinking about!