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Help! LDR isn't LDR anymore. Any advice?


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jenn_witcher

My boyfriend and I have been doing the long distance thing for 5 1/2 years. 3 weeks ago, he got a job 30 minutes from me. Any advice on how to transition from the long distance relationship mentality to a "normal" relationship?

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The best advice I can give you is, take it slow. Go out on "dates," don't push it. Just bc you have been in a "relationship" for 5 and a half years, really doesn't mean ANYTHING. A LDR, in my opinion, is the same as no relationship...only its a little easier to trick the mind into thinking that you are not "alone." ...that's it.

 

So, you gotta get to know each other again, dont push it, take it slow, and dont be too hard on yourself that it isn't coming naturally. The other problem with LDR's is that, they aren't "real time." It's just not the same, no matter how many times you visit each other, or how many hours you communicate (by phone, internet, etc).

 

It's gonna take time, and if you two care about each other...and really WANT a relationship (not use the LDR as a "safe" relationship bc it isn't a relationship with the real demands) then you should be fine.

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WOW!!! Five and a half years LDR!!! Had he not decided to get a job near you, how many more years would you have done the LDR thing before you opted for somebody near you? Not meaning any offense, just extremely curious.

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jenn_witcher

He had until Christmas to get home. We started dating right before he went off to law school in Chicago. I was in school when we started dating, but took some time off. I just finished in December.

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