GF is a nimfo and I'm constantly jealous.

[Guest]

Ok, so my gf is a nimfo she craves sex and from hearing what she's done in the past, dating multiple guys, sex a the workplace it's hard for me to keep the jealousy and thoughts out of my head.

My gf just got a new job at a factory wheres theres going to be alot alot more guys then girls. And of course the thoughts are starting to pour into my head and I hate it. I'm thinking great she's around lots of guys, she smokes pot maybe she'll be offered some, maybe something will happen with a guy at work sometime... and it's a snowball effect in my mind. I hate it so much. Yes, my confidence isn't the greatest but it shouldn't be bad. Every girl I've dated has told me multiple times how good looking I am, I've been called hot so many times and yet my confidence just lacks so much that I become jealous whenever the girl I'm seeing starts at a new workplace or is out with friends alone. I will say that part of it could stem from a past relationship where one of my ex's wasn't so truthfull.

[Spectre]

so you have a gf who craves sex, and who has admitted to having relationships with multiple men at once, and for time reason chose to tell you about her sexual escapades at work.

 

If she's the type to go off with a strange guy who offers her pot and smoke with him, do you really wanna be with this girl? do you really wanna be with someone who's cheated in the past? Does she ever go out and hang out with guys alone?

[Guest]

your GF sounds just like me actually your relationship sounds just like me and my guy all i can tell you is you got to trust her and if she really loves and it is meant to be then everything will work out for the good me and my guy are very jealous people and we have cheated on each other but we discussed all our sexual experiences before and after each other and it has brought us closer so just trust her especially if she has never cheated on you

[catgirl1927]

"Nympho." Short for "nymphomaniac."

[Yamaha]

Find a different girl who you feel you can trust. Your jealousy issues will get in the way of your relationship and I don't think this type of girl suits you.

[Bryanp]

From what you have written I would be scared to death that she would give me a sexually transmitted disease. It sounds like she has no boundaries when it comes to sex with multiple people. Why would you feel good having this person as a girlfriend?

[catgirl1927]

Actually, this is the OP's problem and not the girl's problem. He lacks self confidence.

[roxyg]

I think it is a problem on both sides. It's hard to fully trust someone who is so honest about their past sexual experiences that involve multiple partners. At least she was honest, but could this be an excuse if something does happen with someone else; say she cheats on him, but then says, well I told you about my past, so you can't be too mad. Unfortunately he does have problems stemming from a past relationship with infedelity. I guess, he should deal with his issues, and explain to his current partner what is going on with him; and hopefully his partner will be able to gain his trust, and has left her multiple partner needs in the past. Personally, I think if she is satisfied, then she won't have or want the need for sex with anyone but him, regardless of her heightened sex drive.

[catgirl1927]

I'm not sure why someone having a healthy sex drive automatically means they are a whore who will do it anywhere anytime with anyone. That's a pretty big leap to make.

 

I read that she dated more than one guy at a time, not that she had gang-bangs every weekend. Did I misread?

 

I mean, if a guy slept around in college, does it mean he'll cheat on his wife?

[Spectre]

I'm not sure why someone having a healthy sex drive automatically means they are a whore who will do it anywhere anytime with anyone. That's a pretty big leap to make.

 

Perhaps, if she hadn't told him she'd dated multiple guys at once

 

I read that she dated more than one guy at a time, not that she had gang-bangs every weekend. Did I misread?

 

You seem confused, having gang-bangs every weekend is the job of a pornstar. Dating more guy than once is just whorey

 

I mean, if a guy slept around in college, does it mean he'll cheat on his wife?

 

Rephrase, "If a guy slept around in college while he had a girlfriend" yes, thats reason to be suspicious of cheating. It doesnt 100% mean he'll cheat, but the chances are higher.

[catgirl1927]

She went to dinner one night with one guy, the next night with another guy, and now she's a whore? And it's perfectly ok for a guy to date more than one girl as long as he doesn't have a girlfriend, but if a girl does the exact same thing, she's a whore? How's that double standard working out for you?

[mental_traveller]

I mean, if a guy slept around in college, does it mean he'll cheat on his wife?

 

Generally yes.

 

Smokes pot, sex at the workplace, dating multiple guys at once, very high sex drive. This generally isn't the profile of a faithful person. Maybe you know people like that who never so much as look at another person while they're in a relationship, but I'd say that was the exception rather than the rule.

[Yamaha]

I find it interesting that the women are sticking up for this gals behavior. I thought your original question was that you wanted advice as to your jealousy issues. I don't think this type of gal is for you if you can't handle her flirting ways. You don't need to accept her behavior if that is not what you want. Just tell her that she isn't for you and find someone you feel more comfortable around.

[climbergirl]

WTF?? Over and over in this thread, the conclusion has been made (with the exception of Catgirl <if another- I apologize for the ommission.) that the GF has dated multiple guys AT ONCE. That may be the case, but that isn't what the OP said---he said, "dated multiple guys".

 

I feel defensive of her because right away most have jumped on the bandwagon that she is a whore-- Never considering that the OP may be extremely jealous and possessive of his GF. Maybe we gals are defensive because we've dated men who are insecure with the fact that we have slept with any man before them.

 

Quite possibly what is needed here is some clarity on the situation before burning her at the stake.

[Adunaphel]

Why do you think your gf is a nymphomaniac?

 

Enjoying sex does not make someone a nymphomaniac. There are men who would be thrilled to be with a girl who likes sex so much.

 

If she had sex at the workplace, it does not mean anything in itself, either.

Unless, say, she slept with her boss to get a salary raise.

 

Dating multiple guys can be okay, what really should matter is how she behaved towards them.

Dating more than one guy at a time is one thing, cheating is another.

If the guys she was dating at the same time thought they were in a commited relationship, that would be something to worry about.

 

Many people crave sex, have dated a lot of people, have an 'interesting' sexual part and yet can be very faithful and trustworthy partners.

 

Anyway, if you are so jealous it would be better to find another girlfriend.

 

In case she never cheated on anyone, and generally behaved honestly with whomever she dated, though, keep in mind that the problem would be *you* having insecurities issues, not her being a "nympho".

[Spectre]

She went to dinner one night with one guy, the next night with another guy, and now she's a whore?

 

Uh, how do you know thats the case tho? Did he ever say it was just casual dates with various men? when i hear dating multiple men at once i hear: she had multiple bfs simultaneously, which YES, is very god damn slutty.

 

And it's perfectly ok for a guy to date more than one girl as long as he doesn't have a girlfriend, but if a girl does the exact same thing, she's a whore? How's that double standard working out for you?

 

Double standard? yeah, and the feminist stuff you routinely spew out never gets old, never. Either youre a feminist, or you just have a passion for double standards, i dont like them either, but this isnt one of them, please tell me why you would think among his list of things that upset him would be his gf going to dinner with one guy one night, and another a diffrent night.Also tell me exactly where i said its ok for a guy to date more than one girl as long as he doesnt have a girlfriend, and by date I dont mean a casual dinner, I mean "dating" you know, how when people say they are "dating" it usually means they are together? i dont care if guys/girls have casual flings, just dont do it when youre with someone, its dirty

 

I cant imagine why in gods name he would add in that she went on casual dates with men, thats basically her traveling the date scene, you haev to go on dates with various people to see if you like them, sure as hell isnt the same as having multiple bf's, which is how I took it.

[catgirl1927]

Uh, how do you know thats the case tho? Did he ever say it was just casual dates with various men? when i hear dating multiple men at once i hear: she had multiple bfs simultaneously, which YES, is very god damn slutty.

 

 

 

Double standard? yeah, and the feminist stuff you routinely spew out never gets old, never. Either youre a feminist, or you just have a passion for double standards, i dont like them either, but this isnt one of them, please tell me why you would think among his list of things that upset him would be his gf going to dinner with one guy one night, and another a diffrent night.Also tell me exactly where i said its ok for a guy to date more than one girl as long as he doesnt have a girlfriend, and by date I dont mean a casual dinner, I mean "dating" you know, how when people say they are "dating" it usually means they are together? i dont care if guys/girls have casual flings, just dont do it when youre with someone, its dirty

 

I cant imagine why in gods name he would add in that she went on casual dates with men, thats basically her traveling the date scene, you haev to go on dates with various people to see if you like them, sure as hell isnt the same as having multiple bf's, which is how I took it.

 

Well, it's pretty clear that you've decided that because I am an independent woman that everything I say is stupid.

 

The OP never says what he means by dating multiple guys. He never even specifies if "multiple" means 2 or 10.

 

I don't know that she wasn't sleeping with all of them, but you don't know that she was. You are assuming she is, I'm assuming she isn't. If she was, then yeah, that's slutty. The difference is, I think a guy who is sleeping with multiple women is slutty too.

 

If you knew anything about what I "routinely" post you'd know how I feel about cheaters.

 

Your contempt for me really doesn't mean much, considering that you only have it because I have the gall to think I deserve to be treated like a human being instead of a possession.

[hyakku]

.....what?

 

OP, as long as she didn't tell them they were exclusive, what's wrong with multiple partners? Sex at the workplace? So what she wanted a little kinkiness in her sex life, sex doesn't change because you are in a different location. Your final complaint is utterly pathetic. High sex drive? So she should have a low sex drive and only have sex a few times in her life just to make sure she has kids then power down her box for the rest of her life? Please, no offense, but you need one of those really conservative Christian girls that will stay faithful to you and only have sex when its necessary for child birth.

[climbergirl]

.....what?

 

OP, as long as she didn't tell them they were exclusive, what's wrong with multiple partners? Sex at the workplace? So what she wanted a little kinkiness in her sex life, sex doesn't change because you are in a different location. Your final complaint is utterly pathetic. High sex drive? So she should have a low sex drive and only have sex a few times in her life just to make sure she has kids then power down her box for the rest of her life? Please, no offense, but you need one of those really conservative Christian girls that will stay faithful to you and only have sex when its necessary for child birth.

 

Saying what I couldn't convey..........nice post.

[Spectre]

Well, it's pretty clear that you've decided that because I am an independent woman that everything I say is stupid.

 

How is it clear? Im just tired of girls who turn every god damn thing into "youre only saying that cuz shes a woman!" no, a whore is a whore, whether male nor female.

 

I don't know that she wasn't sleeping with all of them, but you don't know that she was. You are assuming she is, I'm assuming she isn't. If she was, then yeah, that's slutty. The difference is, I think a guy who is sleeping with multiple women is slutty too.

 

Use common sense tho, his post is about being worried over his gfs past. Now, to me, going on various dates with men isnt anything, but having multiple bfs at once is, i dont see why he'd include it if it wasnt the latter

 

Your contempt for me really doesn't mean much, considering that you only have it because I have the gall to think I deserve to be treated like a human being instead of a possession.

 

its funny how you constantly need to hide behind BS like this.

[hyakku]

How is it clear? Im just tired of girls who turn every god damn thing into "youre only saying that cuz shes a woman!" no, a whore is a whore, whether male nor female.

 

 

 

Use common sense tho, his post is about being worried over his gfs past. Now, to me, going on various dates with men isnt anything, but having multiple bfs at once is, i dont see why he'd include it if it wasnt the latter

 

 

 

its funny how you constantly need to hide behind BS like this.

 

I'm going with catgirl, whether you recognize it or not, you are a bit sexist.

 

He said she dated multiple guys, that doesn't mean she had multiple boyfriends. You've attacked her for being a whore, when it sounds like she's just a woman with a healthy sex drive. Really, this man is whining over nothing, and you aren't helping him at all by telling him his whining is justified, the point is, its not. Not only does he have nothing to do with her past, but she did nothing WRONG that he has told us in her past. If he comes out and says they all thought they were in a commited relationship with her, then its different, but if not, all is fair in the dating world.

[amblin]

I'm a female and I don't find that Spectre is being sexist at all. I too, got the vibe of the old and mouldy feminist rant. In fact, Spectre, I agree with most of what you said.

 

For the OP, don't stick with the girl. Whether or not she's really a nymph or you are just too possessive/jealous/insecure, it's quite clear it's causing you way too much discomfort and you have to realise she ain't going to change for you.

 

Find someone else who you can love and respect, and who can return that to you, so that you can have a trusting relationship.

[YellowLioness]

This thread is a disaster.

 

Look kiddo, sometimes, it doesn't matter if other people think you're sexist, or whatever, it's all about what YOU as an INDIVIDUAL can tolerate.

 

So, IMHO, if you are this jealous over your girlfriend getting a job, you need to let go, and give yourself time to work out your deep seated issues in a therapists office.

 

I don't think you should date anyone until you work this out. You're probably driving your girlfriend insane.

 

Notice, I'm not going to speculate on what she is, or is not doing. What is important is YOUR reaction, which is kinda scary.

 

Something else to ponder- I've found that ususally the people who get really jealous are the same people that are actually cheating on their SO's. Just a thought.

 

Usually, to imagine the worst of someone, you have to be able to see those self same qualities in yourself. Maybe, rather then wonder whether your girlfriend is a whore, you should wonder why you are thinking the worst of her, regardless of her past.

 

Tell her to smoke a bowl for me...Gosh I miss those days. ;-)