kryptoknight Posted July 21, 2005 Share Posted July 21, 2005 My girlfriend just recently moved out on her own and I was happy about her decission. We've been seeing each other for about 3 years now and we have our fair share of serious arguments and fights, but often talked things over. The first 4 days after she moved in her new bachelor suite, I slept over for 2 nights. On the 4rth night after our 3rd year anniversary, we are both excited and started to make love passionately, and leads to sex. A few hours passed by and suddenly there is this guy that she used to be her co-worker asking her if he could sleep over since he is homeless. My girfriend didn't told me anything about this guy and she told me at that moment that he already let him sleep over last few days passed, because he needs a place to sleep then after he get his first pay cheque he will get his apartment. I was totally shocked and angry! I started accusing my girlfriend and thinking bad things that happend between the 2 of them. I asked her to not to let this guy sleep over that night or else I am going to break up with her. She kept on insisting that they never did anything bad and she was just being helpfull to him and she admits that it looks really bad for anyone to know about it. I was really mad at that time and descided to leave and get my things from her apartment, but she sat on the door steps so that I couldn't get out of her apartment, because she knows that once I leave, I will never come back again. I insisted not to let this guy slept in tonight, but she can't let him sleep outside because he doesn't have any place to go. I forced my way out of her apartment and was really mad about the situation. After I drove away, I decided to come back and look through her apartment windows to see if something is going to happen between the 2 of them. To my surprise, I was right, after an hour of them talking, they started kissing each other. My chest felt so heavy and my stomach flipped over, then I found myself punching the window screen, opening the window to catch them in the act. I swear at their faces and demended to open the door so I can get all my things I left behind her apartment. They we're scared to poen the door for me, untill I cahnged the tone of my voice calmly. I told my gf that it was over for us already and I just want to get all my things in her apartment. Finally, she opend the door and the guy left to let us talk privately. Once I started getting my things and packing it up, I was really mad and tried to push her away from me. She started holding me tightly and started telling me that she didn't want to do it, and trying to make look into her face, telling me that She loves me. I still sticked to my descission of leaving and didn't listen to her explanations, untill she started crying out so loud and blaming her self, her past and for being so weak. She also told me that she doesn't know how to react. I was standing there still listening, and then she started telling me that once I leave, she doesn't have anyone in her life and shes wishing that she could just die at that moment. She started poking her wrist with her hair clip enough to leave punctured marks as she cried out so loud begging me not to go and holding on to my legs. I tried to calm her down because Im worried about her. Once she calmed herself down I still left her apartment without certainty. She already cheated on my before when she was in highschool but I already forgiven her and she promised me that she will never cheat on my ever again. We already talked about our weddings and future plans and we often been deeply inlove with each other. I am really confused and don't know what to do. She was my first love and I really love her so much that I did everything for her to make her happy and I was always there for her when she needs me. Now I don't know how I can get her trust back and not get haunted by what I saw. Im really hurt so bad that I can't even think and focus at work..... Please help me up with this situation...I don't know what to do. Thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
harleygirl92156 Posted July 21, 2005 Share Posted July 21, 2005 You don't need to earn her trust, SHE NEEDS TO EARN YOURS!!!! She is a master manipulator. The way she acted was to just get you do do what she wanted. That kind of desperate act in the face of what had happened is just games. Run, don't walk away from her! Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted July 22, 2005 Share Posted July 22, 2005 Hello, I feel very sorry for your pain but you made the right decision without a doubt. Think about it. In the past she cheated on you. She now moves out and immediately lets a homeless man stay with her? You are not out the door 1 hour when you go back and catch them in the act? You can bet she was probably screwing him the two nights you were not with her and he stayed over. She hides this from you and continues to have sex with you. You need to immediately get checked for STD's. I am sorry but she is totally screwed up and she will drag you down with her if you let her. How could she keep this secret that she is letting another man spend the night with her withhout telling you unless she was doing something she should not have been doing and you caught her yourself with this guy later on. You know she is a liar and a cheat. Move on and find someone else who has morals and has her head on straight. She sounds like a drama queen. How could you be proud to have someone like her as a girlfriend who would disrespect and humiliate this way? You would never be able to trust a girl like this. You deserve better. I wish you luck. Link to post Share on other sites
sanne Posted July 22, 2005 Share Posted July 22, 2005 sounds like my ex man. be glad your finding out now and not after you put a rock on her finger. you are a strong brother, cut her loose and move on with your life, you deserve better. Link to post Share on other sites
run like the wind Posted July 22, 2005 Share Posted July 22, 2005 Straight up ... She pulled some master manipulater moves on you and you fell for it. If you didn't bang on the window she would've had sex with him, and you best believe it wasn't her first time having sex with him. You should've kicked the guys ass while you caught them in the act, leave the girl and find someone who TRUELY cares not someone who cares but the minute your out the door shes on to her next man. Link to post Share on other sites
Author kryptoknight Posted July 22, 2005 Author Share Posted July 22, 2005 Originally posted by harleygirl92156 You don't need to earn her trust, SHE NEEDS TO EARN YOURS!!!! She is a master manipulator. The way she acted was to just get you do do what she wanted. That kind of desperate act in the face of what had happened is just games. Run, don't walk away from her! Yeah, I typed it wrong , it should be my trust. Thanks for the correction. Im just emotionally disturbed when I post this. Link to post Share on other sites
aares Posted July 22, 2005 Share Posted July 22, 2005 OMG dood...I hate saying this because you say you love her...but she is a ho and she already proved this by cheating on you once before. Say "f*** you" and be outtie because you do not need her bull****...no matter how much she begs, b1tch slap her lightly then laugh at her because she will realize what she wont have when you are gone and that in itself will be awesome for you. Stay away for good. Link to post Share on other sites
Author kryptoknight Posted July 22, 2005 Author Share Posted July 22, 2005 Originally posted by Bryanp Hello, I feel very sorry for your pain but you made the right decision without a doubt. Think about it. In the past she cheated on you. She now moves out and immediately lets a homeless man stay with her? You are not out the door 1 hour when you go back and catch them in the act? You can bet she was probably screwing him the two nights you were not with her and he stayed over. She hides this from you and continues to have sex with you. You need to immediately get checked for STD's. I am sorry but she is totally screwed up and she will drag you down with her if you let her. How could she keep this secret that she is letting another man spend the night with her withhout telling you unless she was doing something she should not have been doing and you caught her yourself with this guy later on. You know she is a liar and a cheat. Move on and find someone else who has morals and has her head on straight. She sounds like a drama queen. How could you be proud to have someone like her as a girlfriend who would disrespect and humiliate this way? You would never be able to trust a girl like this. You deserve better. I wish you luck. Thanks for the advice, right now im just trying my best to get over her. Its hard because shes my first love. She was looking forward of gettting married with me and she already asked me when we should have our first baby. Everything was going fine except that one evening. Part of it, Im thinking this guy just bul**** about being homeless just to get his chance. I never heared any news about this guy anymore ever since we broke up. I talked to her about having an open relationship before we get into serious relationship, but she didn't like that idea. Its true, always nice guys finish last. Link to post Share on other sites
Author kryptoknight Posted July 22, 2005 Author Share Posted July 22, 2005 BTW. thanks everyone for replying and support. I need to get over her as soon as possible, but 3 years is hard let go. Hopefully I will forget about her in a few months. :'( Link to post Share on other sites
Sal Paradise Posted July 22, 2005 Share Posted July 22, 2005 Yeah she's a slut (stating the obvious). There is no curing her. She doesn't really love you. She just likes the security of having you. Ignore her suicidal threats, she is a coward and lacks backbone, she isn't going to hurt herself. She is just trying to manipulate you. And even if she does hurt herself, so what. She caused it so why feel sorry for the worthless skank. You seem like a good guy. There are plenty of girls who would love to date you. Link to post Share on other sites
Cecelius Posted July 22, 2005 Share Posted July 22, 2005 To me the relationship would have been over when the male friend "needed" to stay over. A skank like that isn't worth another thought. Just get yourself tested and move on. I think this brings to a close any further need for posts about g/fs going "camping," "visiting" or otherwise with male friends. Link to post Share on other sites
Sal Paradise Posted July 22, 2005 Share Posted July 22, 2005 Originally posted by Cecelius To me the relationship would have been over when the male friend "needed" to stay over. A skank like that isn't worth another thought. Just get yourself tested and move on. I think this brings to a close any further need for posts about g/fs going "camping," "visiting" or otherwise with male friends. Exactly. No way would I stay with anyone who was demanding to go camping with a guy, or let some guy stay over. Link to post Share on other sites
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