Help I Slept With My Best Friends Guy

[buster25]

I am incredibly upset and I dont know what I am going to do. A bunch of us went out last night for my best friends birthday, we reserved a hotel room and all started drinking there before going to a local club. Everyone was getting pretty wasted including this guy I guess you could say my friend is sorta dating. They arent boyfriend and girlfriend and have only gone on one date but they basically talk to eachother everyday and me, my best friend and him and his best friend always hang out. Well everyone was doing shots at the club and this guy was getting pretty wasted he was puking in the bathroom and everything. So my friend and I took him back to our hotel so he could crash. Well one thing lead to another and his pants ended up coming off and we were all doing flirty stuff. He would make out with my friend and then try to get me to perform oral sex on him which I didnt. I did however fool around with it a lil bit but didnt totally perform oral sex. My friend was there and she was just laughing about it.

 

We were all having fun and were just laughing, when my friend got up to go to the bathroom and out of nowhere he leaped on me and started making out with me and grabbing me everywhere and made me put my hands on his penis. My friend came out of the bathroom and saw me touching it and just sorta said "omg no u arent doing that" but she didnt seem too upset. My friend and him eventually started having sex so i took it as my cue to leave and went down to the hotel lobby. I came back and was upset that they would do that with no regard for me. So when i arrived back at our room he was like "dont be mad at me im sorry", I ignored him and just hopped into my bed and tried to go to sleep. He then said please dont be mad and asked my friend if it was okay if he got into the other bed with me. My friend said she didnt care and he got in bed with me naked. At first he just put his arm around me and then we were both starting to drift off when all of a sudden he came out of nowhere and started making out with me. At this point my friend was snoring so she was obviously asleep and we started fooling around he fingered me and then he went inside me for about 2 minutes and all of a sudden it was like he woke up and realized it wasnt my best friend he was having sex with it was me.

 

At that point we both started freaking out, both shocked at what we did. He ended up screaming at my friend and woke her up. I went to the bathroom cause I felt so sick and he apparently was freaking out to her saying oh my god i just had sex with her. My friend was shocked and when I came out of the bathroom I denied what happened and just said we kissed and that was it. Previously me and this guy had kissed a couple of months ago I was drunk he wasnt but I told my friend and she knew about it. We both finally convinced my friend nothing happened and fell asleep. After we woke up no one spoke about it. My friend and I were on our way home when she brought it up and said that she didnt believe me and that I should just tell her. So I did tell her and she was shocked. I was a virgin before last night and I gave it up to him. I'm also a little scared cause she had sex with him for a lil bit without a condom and then so did I, but with me it was only for 2 minutes.

 

I dont know what I am gonna do. My friend doesnt want to talk to me right now cause shes so hurt and she doesnt believe me when I told her that this guy thought I was her. This guy also said that he doesnt remember having sex with her and that he blacked out that night and didnt wake up til he was having sex with me. I dont know what to do. I would never ever do this and I feel horrible but we were all drunk and you dont think when you are drunk. I'm scared my friend will never talk to me again and I'm also scared that me and my friend might get pregnant. Please help me. I dont know who to turn to and what to do to try to make things right again.

[shygurl]

You all behaved very stupidly and carelessly. You were both separately making out with a guy who was previously puking? Gross. Bet his breath was sweet, not.

 

None of you should be drinking if you can't control yourselves or keep your clothes on. This guy could have a sexually transmitted disease, for all you know. No condoms, no protection, no birth control - and you 'gave it up' to some drunk punk who PRETENDS he didn't realize it was you...........

 

All of you need to grow up in a big fast way.

 

both you and see should get yourself to a clinic as soon as possible, or your family doctors tomorrow, and ask for a prescription for "Emergency Contraception" - which if taken within 72 hrs of unprotected sex can greatly reduce your chances of becoming pregnant (and no, it does NOT cause an abortion). I don't know if you need a prescription for this in the U.S. or if you can get it at the drugstore from the Pharmacist (It's often called "Prevens")............if there's a clinic in your area open today, get into it..........and see the doc and get this.

[shygurl]

I guess "Preven" (as Emergency Contraception) is apparently no longer available in the U.S. or Canada.....now you can get EC that's called "Plan B" -

 

Click on the following links to get the information on what Emergency Contraception is, how it works. The sooner you take it after you've had unprotected sex, the more reliable it is.

 

http://www.4woman.gov/faq/econtracep.htm

 

HERE is a page where you can enter your ZIP CODE *or* AREA CODE and it will tell you the nearest place you can get Emergency Contraceptive:

 

http://ec.princeton.edu/providers/index.html

 

Tell your friend about this, too.......even though you may not be speaking at present, the fact is that Pregnancy is nothing either of you need right now............so just focus on that.

[crazy_grl]

Another story of people getting drunk, acting like idiots, cheating with their friends bf/gf, and then feeling bad and wondering how it could have happened...

 

Originally posted by buster25

I'm also a little scared cause she had sex with him for a lil bit without a condom and then so did I, but with me it was only for 2 minutes.

 

Oh. Then you're okay, because it has to be 3 minutes before you can get a disease or get pregnant. I know I sound like an ass, but read your own post and see how unbelievably ridiculous and stupid you sound. Do yourself a favor and lay off the alcohol. And don't blame it on the alcohol, because "you dont think when you are drunk". You obviously didn't think before you were drunk either or you wouldn't have gotten that f***ed up.

 

This guy also said that he doesnt remember having sex with her and that he blacked out that night and didnt wake up til he was having sex with me.

 

I've seen plenty of people who've been so drunk that they blacked out before. Not once have I ever seen someone just "suddenly wake up". That seems absurd and pretty conveniently made up to me.

 

But maybe he's telling the truth. So what's your excuse? You seem to remember nearly every detail just fine. Usually when people are so drunk that their inhibitions are that far gone, their memory is sketchy at best. I'm sorry to sound rude, but it sounds like you wanted to sleep with him. You were making out and fooling around with him with no problem the entire night. Then you were "suddenly shocked" at what you'd done, but you knew what you were doing the whole time.

 

Do what shygurl said and get to a clinic. They should give you a pregnancy test there to make sure you're not pregnant before they give you the Plan B contraceptive. Also, set up an appointment for STD testing. I believe you have to wait a certain period of time before some will show up on the results. You can ask about that when you call for the appointment.

 

And about your friendship. Your friend might not ever trust you again. One thing you can do though is to never speak to that guy again. If she wants to still, she can, but you shouldn't.

[Naive]

This is some Melrose Place Show drama!!!!

[Cecelius]

Yeah, but just imagine the story this dude is telling people -- "Hey man, I got these two smoking 'hos in the bed..." or "Dear Penthouse letters..."

 

Good thing he didn't have a camera phone...

[Moai]

How come I never meet girls like this at the parties I go to? Man, my life just isn't as interesting as I thought.

 

You really need to learn how to drink, because if you don't you are REALLY heading for trouble.

 

Good luck patching it up with your friend. I'd stay away from that guy and hiis friends, unless you like to hear soft chuckles and whispering all the time.

[SoftDrink]

i don't think this is a real story. the other post buster has leads me to this belief.

 

i could be wrong of course, but i don't think i am.

[buster25]

Well for those doubters no this in not a fake story this really is happening to me. As for what is going on with me and my friend I did talk to her and she took the 72 hr pill I however have not. Things are really bad between my friend and I. shes not mad at the guy as much as she is mad at me, which I guess is understandable. I saw her today at work and I could barely look at her. I still cant believe I did this to her I dont know what I was thinking. To everyone who is saying the guy is some jerk he is anything but. I left out the part where he almost started crying cause of what he had done( I didnt want my post to be a book) He tried calling clinics, called his friend that is a pharmacist for advice, and even offered to pay for the pills and now he is just depressed and scared. As for me though, hes saying I should be fine and my friend says I'll probably be okay too. So I guess I'm not gonna get the pill. I'm just praying that everything is gonna go okay. I really have no one that I can talk to because me and my friend are involved in the same circle and I dont want anyone to find out what a horrible friend I am.

 

I have another thing I need advice on. This guy I had sex with I was sorta hangin out with his best friend for about 9 months it was nothing serious. we messed around alot never sex though, but I liked him and he was the one who decided to just be friends, even though I know he had feelings for me cause of the way he acted (ex. jealousy) So now I wonder should I tell him what happened between me and his best friend and risk him being mad at me and hurting his relationship with his best friend of almost 10 yrs or should I just butt out and let his friend decide whether or not he should tell him? I really dont want to hurt anyone else. I cant believe what I've done and I dont know how I am gonna be able to get through this. I'm so stressed out already at work and now I have to deal with this. I have to wait for 13 days til my period is due. I know making myself stressed isnt helping so I am gonna try to not think about it and hope everythings okay.

 

THANKS GUYS FOR ALL THE HELP I APPRECIATE IT SO MUCH SINCE I HAVE NO ONE ELSE TO TURN TO.

[Naive]

Originally posted by Moai

How come I never meet girls like this at the parties I go to? Man, my life just isn't as interesting as I thought.

 

 

 

 

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

[Cecelius]

HS, just when you thought the story couldn't get any worse...

 

No, I would not raise it with the friend; you will either scare him off (too "Girls Gone Wild") for a relationship or you will encourage him to think of you only as a piece of a@@.

 

Chances are you are undatable in his eyes if he finds out what happened (which has some likelihood since they are pals)

[whichwayisup]

Originally posted by ~Naive~

This is some Melrose Place Show drama!!!!

 

Gawwdd I miss that show. That and 90210!

 

Oh. Then you're okay, because it has to be 3 minutes before you can get a disease or get pregnant. I know I sound like an ass, but read your own post and see how unbelievably ridiculous and stupid you sound. Do yourself a favor and lay off the alcohol. And don't blame it on the alcohol, because "you dont think when you are drunk". You obviously didn't think before you were drunk either or you wouldn't have gotten that f***ed up.

 

Good advice, good humour and rings alot of truth too.

[crazy_grl]

Originally posted by buster25

As for me though, hes saying I should be fine and my friend says I'll probably be okay too. So I guess I'm not gonna get the pill. I'm just praying that everything is gonna go okay.

 

That's really stupid, and it's really stupid of that guy to tell you that, and even worse that you believed him. You do realize I was being sarcastic about the 3 minutes thing, right? Don't you know that a guy can get you pregnant even before he comes no matter how long it's been in? Some semen escapes prior to ejaculation and there's nothing the guy can do to stop it. You can get pregnant from that. It's probably too late by now, but if it's not, then hurry up and get to a clinic for the pills and a test. I think they cost like $20 and the clinic visit is usually free. It's very irresponsible of you not to have gone. Prayer is not a good form of birth control. Just ask a Catholic... (no offense to any Catholics intended.)

 

I really have no one that I can talk to because me and my friend are involved in the same circle and I dont want anyone to find out what a horrible friend I am.

 

That's probably smart, because if you start talking to your friends, rumors are going to start flying and you'll never be able to control them. There will probably be some, but there's no reason for you to start them yourself.

 

You should really make an effort to talk to your friend and work this out. You can give it a little bit of time, but don't let it go on too long.

 

I have another thing I need advice on. This guy I had sex with I was sorta hangin out with his best friend for about 9 months it was nothing serious. we messed around alot never sex though, but I liked him and he was the one who decided to just be friends, even though I know he had feelings for me cause of the way he acted (ex. jealousy) So now I wonder should I tell him what happened between me and his best friend and risk him being mad at me and hurting his relationship with his best friend of almost 10 yrs or should I just butt out and let his friend decide whether or not he should tell him?

 

No, don't tell him. You're not dating him, so it's none of his business, especially since he's the one who didn't want to date. And it's not your place to report to him what his friend's been doing. Even if he asks you, you don't have to tell him unless you two have begun dating.

 

Hope everything works out for you.

[shygurl]

Buster:

 

You really ought to keep your pants on until you can grow up some and learn how to control your booze and until you have a rudimentary understanding of how pregnancy occurs. I can't believe that your friend was smart enough to use Emergency Contraception but you DID NOT - you take the WORD of some dog who sleeps with 2 chicks? Why, when you had a chance to prevent pregnancy, didn't you take it? How totally and incredibly stupid. Please don't come back here now, starting a lame thread like "Could I be pregnant?" because you'll just be wasting our time.

[Sal Paradise]

Originally posted by shygurl

Buster:

 

You really ought to keep your pants on until you can grow up some and learn how to control your booze and until you have a rudimentary understanding of how pregnancy occurs. I can't believe that your friend was smart enough to use Emergency Contraception but you DID NOT - you take the WORD of some dog who sleeps with 2 chicks? Why, when you had a chance to prevent pregnancy, didn't you take it? How totally and incredibly stupid. Please don't come back here now, starting a lame thread like "Could I be pregnant?" because you'll just be wasting our time.

 

Exactly

[onlyhuman]

Wonder how HIV gets around???hmmmm

Have fun with your genital warts STDs, yeast infections and other assorted goodies.

 

Why don't you get a popsicle stick and scrap out your brain since you don't seem to use it??

 

If you think I'm harsh I don't care.

[Opium]

The first mistake:

 

Your friend letting him into bed with you!

 

Second Mistake:

 

You allowing him to get into bed with you!

 

If it wasn't for those 2 BIG MISTAKES, none of this would have happend.

 

How old are you? Yes I must ask because after a certain age you need to think before you act. Alcohol was just an excuse in my opinion, like it always is.

[d'Arthez]

Sorry to reply for original poster, but her first post on Loveshack indicates that she was 21 in December 2004.

[Opium]

Originally posted by d'Arthez

Sorry to reply for original poster, but her first post on Loveshack indicates that she was 21 in December 2004.

 

Wow I was hoping for 15 or even maybe 17 because this behavior is crazy to me. No responsiblity for herself or her actions. Sorry but you need to wake up and smell the coffee. And your best friend must have had a lot of trust in you, no matter how much I trust someone I DON'T and WILL NOT allow my bf to jump into bed with another girl.

[SoftDrink]

i knew this was a scandal. I KNEW IT!

 

blah. whadda waste.

[IhavenoFREAKINclue]

Originally posted by onlyhuman

Wonder how HIV gets around???hmmmm

Have fun with your genital warts STDs, yeast infections and other assorted goodies.

 

Why don't you get a popsicle stick and scrap out your brain since you don't seem to use it??

 

If you think I'm harsh I don't care.

 

Absolutely uncalled for.

She's worried about a problem (granted it was her fault) But people come to LS for help, advice at fault or not and they don't need ignorant Neanderthals like you telling her s*** like that. a**h***.

Originally posted by Opium

The first mistake:

 

Your friend letting him into bed with you!

 

Second Mistake:

 

You allowing him to get into bed with you!

 

If it wasn't for those 2 BIG MISTAKES, none of this would have happened.

 

How old are you? Yes I must ask because after a certain age you need to think before you act. Alcohol was just an excuse in my opinion, like it always is.

 

1000% agree!

 

Your friend's an idiot just as much as the guy. I'm not giving you right tho.

And stop being Naive. Things can happen even if it only stuck in for a split second. You were all wrong. You should of all just had a threesome so EVERYONE would have been satisfied.

 

Your in a pickle honey. The best advice I can give you is grow up and not have any more nights like this one.

[SoftDrink]

Originally posted by IhavenoFREAKINclue

 

 

 

And stop being Naive.

 

[onlyhuman]

Yes my reply was harsh!

You believe I'm an ahole and Neanderthal, I can live with that.

Maybe after being on this site for a year and reading posts like this over and over again I'm frustarted.This isn't a matter of someone who doesn't know better, this is someone who is lazy and doesn't care, big difference.

If this is a true person shock value does wonders.

This girl had plenty of time and info available to her, even her girlfriend at least after exposure went and got help, she did not, that says it all to me right there.With people who act like this sometimes the old electric shock does wonders.

If you reread any of my posts I'm not doing this because I get any joy out of it, I said what I did because along with the other advice mine might sink in as well.

 

Buster , I'm not trying to insult you but scare the crap out of you, I really do hope you can make some positive choices and change things around.

 

ihaveno freakinclue= your right, you don't

[my_manda]

OK, PLEASE READ CAREFULLY!!! Obviously, this story does not add up. You said you went to a bar/club, whatever. Obviously, you are old enough, at least 21, to get into one of these places, and from the sounds of it, this is not your first drunken moment. So you waited till your twenties to have sex, and now, in a fleeting moment you give it up? This seems really unlikely, but hey, whatever.

 

I am curious, when your friend and the guy started having sex, why did you care? You said you came back from the hotel lobby and were mad so they felt bad. Another thing....WAKE UP! He was drunk and asked her if he could crawl in bed with you? Yeah, he did not know what was going to happen or anything?! As a couple they should have consoled you together, and as a friend, you had no reason to be mad. This story is so bizarre.

 

As for him dating your friend....no matter what, that relationship is tarnished and you just need to put yourself out there as someone who will be there for her when this does not work out. HELLO!!! HE had a three way with you and her. Guys typically do not pursue long term, loving relationships with girls who they have threesomes with. Any girl who would let a man crawl into bed naked with her friend is not acting like girlfriend material. I am not saying that is wrong, it is all about what you want at that time in your life, but please hear my advice.......YOU AND YOUR FRIEND MUST SEVER TIES WITH THIS GUY AND MOVE ON! Yes, his BF will probably find out about the whole thing, but whats done is done. I know from experience, it is hard, but you have got move forward and learn from this one.

[IhavenoFREAKINclue]

Originally posted by onlyhuman

Buster , I'm not trying to insult you but scare the crap out of you, I really do hope you can make some positive choices and change things around.

I don't think she's going to listen to someone who talks like they didn't finish 2nd grade. Your an adult.....Act like one.

You could have scared the crap out of her in a nice way. Good advice.....Bad Approach

 

ihaveno freakinclue= your right, you don't

About what exactly?