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What would you do?


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LadybugLucy

This guy who has repeatedly lied to me, called earlier this year to apologize. He sounded so sincere, seemed so genuine, and told me he really missed me. I will link a prior post so you guys can see some of the history.

 

He has now lied again, and this time I finally blocked him on all social media accounts and deleted his phone number. He recently reached out and told me how he is ready to leave where he lives and move to the town where I live. He has been actively interviewing in my town too. Yet, when he would tell me he is in town, I would suggest lunch or dinner but he would not have time. Of course, since he has lied in the past, my gut feeling was that he was hiding something. So I asked again if he was single, dating, etc. He said he is single and not even dating because he doesn't have the time or money (he lost his last job last summer). The reason I know he was lying, and why I have now blocked him, is because I found a post that was a picture of roses and he was tagged. There was a note to the lady and it was signed "Love you" with his name. The lady posted that her boyfriend was a keeper.

 

I have really thought about taking pictures of the few texts I still have from him and sending to her through her social media accounts. His texts tell me he wants to get out of the city where he lives, wants to see me, wants to have sex with me, misses me, etc. The posts I have are from June. I don't have any farther back than that, but he would often tell me how much he cared about me and missed me.

 

I do not have any intention of ever communicating with him again. Although, as a female, when I was cheated on in the past, I wish someone would have told me before I eventually found out. So, a part of me wants to let this total stranger know that the man she is so in love with is a fraud.

 

Would you send the girlfriend the pictures of her lying partner (who is living with her in her house....which he had continuously told me they were just roommates when I found out he was living with her).

 

https://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/643308-i-think-i-made-mistake

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It eventually catches up with them. But it doesn't change them. Don't bother. Stop caring about him and just block him and don't ever go look at his social media and just be done with him. It's the best lesson you can teach him.

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how many times do you have to touch a hot stove to know it burns you?

 

 

Bad people don't need second chances or the benefit of a doubt. Next time at the first sign of trouble/had behavior, kick to curb, don't look back. You wasted so much of your energy on a jack a$$.

 

 

 

The above poster is right, there is nothing you will teach him morally. All it will do is make him more cautious/cunning for his next victim.

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He's a liar, even if you tell her he will do his best to get out of it by lying to her and she'll probably believe his lies because she has more invested in him as they live together. She may even have caught him cheating before and she's still with him. Let them figure themselves out and stay out of it. Your drama with him is over, block him, move on. Do not spend one more second of energy on him. Most of the time the person that tells is being viewed as a trouble maker.

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He has now lied again, and this time I finally blocked him on all social media accounts and deleted his phone number. He recently reached out and told me how he is ready to leave where he lives and move to the town where I live.

 

 

I don't know how you blocked him and he reached out to you. Explain how that works.

 

What would you do?

 

I would really block him this time and never speak to him again.

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This guy who has repeatedly lied to me,

 

This is where I stopped reading.

 

"One lie, you're on notice; two lies, you're dismissed" needs to be your policy.

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LadybugLucy
I don't know how you blocked him and he reached out to you. Explain how that works.

 

What would you do?

 

I would really block him this time and never speak to him again.

 

I blocked him on social media and deleted his phone number. He reached out through text, and he has now reached out a few times. I’ve ignored every time. I have nothing to say to him.

 

Thank you all for your replies. I still catch myself thinking about him every day. Although when I think about him, I’m not missing him like I was, I get mad at him for being a liar and mad at me for trusting him again and giving him another chance.

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I blocked him on social media and deleted his phone number. He reached out through text, and he has now reached out a few times. I’ve ignored every time. I have nothing to say to him.

 

Thank you all for your replies. I still catch myself thinking about him every day. Although when I think about him, I’m not missing him like I was, I get mad at him for being a liar and mad at me for trusting him again and giving him another chance.

 

Block his texts so you don't have to keep getting reminded of him.

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  • 2 weeks later...
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LadybugLucy

Ugh! I finally blocked his texts. He had continued to text asking me to respond to him. Then he sent a text saying he hopes he hadn’t done anything to offend me. I’ve now learned that even if you block someone on an iPhone, and they call you and leave a voicemail, the voice mail will appear under “Blocked Messages.” So you still get the voicemail. He called me this past Saturday and left a message. He ended the message with “I’ll talk to you soon.” Umm no he won’t. I briefly unblocked him on Instagram to see if I could find evidence of him no longer being with his gf - thinking that’s why he’s trying so hard to contact me. I found evidence that they are still very much together, but he has removed pictures that she tagged him in. Although they are still on her page. He was also posting about how he had been at a conservative Faith-based conference. Yet his gf promotes liberals and agnosticism. Whatever. That’s his life. He’s a liar and a fraud. I re-blocked him and the feelings of being mad all over again came back. I always say I don’t hate anybody because hate is a strong word, but I’m close to hating him. Why won’t he leave me alone? I have not communicated with him in over a month. Ugh.

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People can only make you feel bad if you let them.

 

Forget him. Focus on something that brings you joy and move on...

Edited by BaileyB
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I blocked him on social media and deleted his phone number. He reached out through text, and he has now reached out a few times. I’ve ignored every time. I have nothing to say to him.

 

Thank you all for your replies. I still catch myself thinking about him every day. Although when I think about him, I’m not missing him like I was, I get mad at him for being a liar and mad at me for trusting him again and giving him another chance.

 

Block him from texting you.

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LadybugLucy

I did after he text asking if he offended me. I blocked him completely. That’s how I learned the iPhone saves voicemails from blocked callers.

 

I debated responding to him and telling him I caught him in another lie, and I don’t ever want to hear from him again. Then I decided to ignore him and not even respond. I just hate that when I saw his texts, I began to pine for what used to be (before I found out he was lying).

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MountainGirl111

Tell yourself your days of pining over any guy are over. OVER. Then proceed to live your life with joy and passion. I'm sure there are things in life you are passionate about that don't involve him...so get out there and pursue those passions girl. It's likely he's still tied to the other gal because he has not money and she provides a roof over his head. He wants to keep you on the back burner until he gets his life together better...so he wants some reassurance you will be waiting for him. In the meantime...life would be passing you by second by second, minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day. It's time to break loose and embrace life fully. He's dragging you down.

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Lotsgoingon

Really one lie is enough to fire someone ...

 

Two lies ... fired twice.

 

When he came to town and said he'd call and didn't. It's over.

 

And no, I wouldn't text the woman who you think he is with ... Why? ... One, she is none of your business ... And two ... because she, like you, probably already has enough evidence to distrust him ... and so may just ask him what's the deal (a really not-so-smart move to ask a liar to concoct an explanation) ... he'll lie to her, and she'll blame you for lying on him.

 

Not your business. Ignore him ... Don't listen to voice messages from him ... as soon as you hear his voice, delete, celebrate your freedom from him and move on ...

 

Keep ignoring him and he'll stop calling.

 

Good luck.

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MountainGirl111

Yeah, do not text or contact the other woman.

 

It won't change the facts you already have. Don't stoop to this, even if you are tempted/curious. Of course you're curious. Maybe hoping it would give you some answers. But more than likely all that would do is stir up more QUESTIONS...that he would feel compelled to lie about...==more lies...the other woman might lie too...but you have the facts:

 

He didn't contact you when he was in town: fact. He's living with another women: fact. He's lied: fact. He doesn't have his crap together: fact.

 

Actions not words.His actions or lack thereof are the facts in this case.

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