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Should I Leave My Husband


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My husband cheated on me when I went out of town. When me and my daughter were out of town he brought a woman into our home and into my bed.

 

The woman came to my home and confessed what went on in our bedroom.

I guess the reason why she told was because she was tired of his b.s.

At any rate I ended up having a seizure behind this event.

 

All my friends are telling me to leave him because before the incident happen I was not in love with him any way.

They are right. I don't like him any more. He disgusts me. We have a 16 year old daughter that makes me stay in this relationship. When she takes off to college, I would like to divorce.

 

I do not sleep with him. I sleep in the den. I refuse to let that man touch me.

 

I need to unbias help. What should I do?

 

Your attention to this matter would be greatly appreciated.

 

Thanks.

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Have you confronted your husband about what happened when you were out of town? You definitely need to talk to him and tell him how you feel. If you don't love him anymore, you have no reason to be staying with him. Your daughter is not a valid reason if things are that bad. I personally think it is worse to expose kids to things like that. She needs to see you standing up for yourself, getting out of a bad situation and being independent. Start working on a plan to get out. That's my advice.

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VASH THE STAMPEDE
Originally posted by DREAMTEAM

My husband cheated on me when I went out of town. When me and my daughter were out of town he brought a woman into our home and into my bed.

 

The woman came to my home and confessed what went on in our bedroom.

I guess the reason why she told was because she was tired of his b.s.

At any rate I ended up having a seizure behind this event.

He was wrong for this ,but how come you didn't expect it??

 

All my friends are telling me to leave him because before the incident happen I was not in love with him any way.

They are right. I don't like him any more. He disgusts me. We have a 16 year old daughter that makes me stay in this relationship. When she takes off to college, I would like to divorce.

 

I do not sleep with him. I sleep in the den. I refuse to let that man touch me.

 

I need to unbias help. What should I do?

 

Your attention to this matter would be greatly appreciated.

 

Thanks.

But you kept him tied up with you because a child in common.

From what I see the marriage was all ready over before the affair,you should set him free from any ties to you, except the child which has the right to see its father.

In my opinion you pushed him away and he had no alternative out of this but to cheat.

There is NO love there just obligation.

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Originally posted by VASH THE STAMPEDE

He was wrong for this, but how come you didn't expect it??

Vash - Why should a woman "expect" her husband to cheat on her?

 

But you kept him tied up with you because a child in common.

From what I see the marriage was all ready over before the affair, you should set him free from any ties to you, except the child which has the right to see its father.

In my opinion you pushed him away and he had no alternative out of this but to cheat.

There is NO love there just obligation.

What did she say to make you think she kept him "tied up" with her? And what makes you think she pushed him away? I'm a little confused by these comments.

 

And as far as your comment that he had no alternative but to cheat, that's RIDICULOUS! They both have the same alternatives. He can file for divorce as easily as she can. That's his alternative to cheating. I can't believe you're making it sound as if this is her fault and she somehow deserved it. Argh!!

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VASH THE STAMPEDE

I'm not trying to say it was her fault ,but what did she expect?

from what I got there was no LOVE there,he saw that.

He also has needs ,to be loved ,cared for,made love to,whatever.

THEY DID NOT GET ALONG

.

I agree with you he could have gotten a divorce,but we know nothing about their financial situation.Divorces don't come free.

About her pushing him away,she had ill feeling toward him and he felt this.

And IN NO way I'm saying she deserved this.NO one deserves this.

But after such a long time you should've told him to file for a divorce.

Staying together for a child is no excuse.Two people don't get along ,break it off.

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It's difficult enough to keep a marriage afloat once the love and respect between two individuals are gone. This affair has only added insult to injury, and now you have lost whatever "trust" you had as well.

 

Everything that this relationship was based upon is gone. The foundation is ruined. All that's left is whatever financial and parental obligations you share. I would normally suggest a relationship councilor, but I predict the damage goes so deep that it is already beyond repair.

 

As Cindy stated, it's time to start planning your escape. The first business in order is to contact an attorney, preferably female, who will schedule a consultation with you and help you get your plan in order. A lawyer will help you sort out your property settlement and custody issues. Whatever you do, don't leave the home until the paperwork is drawn up and a lawyer advises you as to how you should proceed. Otherwise, it will be considered "abandonment."

 

So sorry that this has happened. :(

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I think you should leave him. Contact an attorney and see what your options are. If he did it before he will do it again. In your house and bed- how awful.

 

 

You must find him so repugnant now and could never sleep with him ever again.

 

What a moron also-I do not mean to be gross but there are other ways of dealing with these urges.

 

 

I wish you luck with the pain and situation.. Speaking as a guy- I could never be with someone that cheated on me. My love would turn to hate instantly.

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