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Wife and male "friends"


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Well Ive read similar stories in other post but heres mine. Im 25 been married about 5 years now and have two kids...Me and my wife have had quiet a few ups and downs. Of course a reacuring issue between us is her male friends... About a year and a half ago we were seperated for a few months because she wasnt happy (while I later found she had cheated on me before we even got into that, with a "friend")...So after much drama we decided to get back together...

 

But of course theres some things that still nag me in my mind. Really ever since we met shes had an excess of male friends.Girls come and go but the guy ones always seem to be there. Ive busted her being way more than friendly in E Mails and at "girls night outs", which she either says "Im sorry" or Im over reacting...Few months ago I found out she had found her ex boyfriend from 6 years ago on myspace and they communicate often. I told her that bothered me but again she insisted they were just friends...

 

And recently she seems to be best friends with her ex-best girlfriends husband. And the thing I hate is whatever goes on between me and her she just relays it right over to her guy friend. We argue, she tells him about it, new things in our sex life, she tells him...Last night I really got pissed when she came home from her massage therapy class, talking to him on her cell phone and totally ignoring me coming in the door...Needless to say we are not on good terms now.

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Sorry to say this, but your wife seems very immature. And, she's not acting like a married woman, she's acting single! She should NOT be discussing those types of things with those male friends of hers.

 

She has cheated on you once before, and now you don't trust her. But, really, what has she done to re-gain your trust? She hasn't cut off any male friends, she communicates with them all the time.

 

Her priorities are screwed up and she needs a swift kick in the arse!

 

She needs to understand her actions have consquences. And that home isn't a place just to hang her hat! Her coming home talking to some guy on the cell and ignoring you is rude and intentional. She isn't thinking of you at all, so it seems.

 

You have every right to be pissed off, hurt and concerned!

 

Question is, what are you going to do about this?

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She cheated on you and you took her back, yet nothing has changed.

 

Can it get any worse than it already is?

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honestly why does she have to give up these guys? You have proven that you are all just talk when it comes to anything, she had cheated on you, and you take her back, she talks with tons of guys and you don't do anything. Sounds to me that you both got married very young and you never developed the backbone to tell her that its either you or them, and actually stick to it.

 

Until the day you do you are going to find her talking, flirting and more then likely cheating on you

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LucreziaBorgia

Time for 'make it or break it'. She has a proven history of cheating with male "friends", and it is time to end the "friendships" or end the marriage.

 

First gather evidence. Put a keylogger on her computer if she has one. Get detailed phone bills for her cell phone. Hire a PI if you can afford it. Once you get the evidence you need, time for step two:

 

I would seriously consider contacting a doctor and getting STD testing, and a lawyer and finding out what your options are. Have separation/divorce papers drawn up. If you are in a 'fault' state, consider those options as well. Contact the wife of your WS's "new best friend" and let her know your WW's history with 'friendships' and that you fear there is more there than 'just friends'. Expose and blow that "friendship" right out of the water.

 

Once you do that sit her down, show her the separation/divorce papers and tell her that she has a clear choice: she either goes into solid 'no contact' with her male 'friends' - no more new 'friendships' - and commits to marriage counseling and STD testing, or you will sign those papers and throw her out.

 

Anything less than a clear and solid choice means consent. It entirely depends on how you want the rest of your life to play out: misery with a cheater, reconciliation/rebuilding, or divorce and a chance to find someone who will truly help you find happiness.

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If the roles were reversed do you honestly think that your wife would accept such crap from you? She continuously humiliates and disrespects you. She cheated previously on you and constantly hangs with other male friends. She is married to you but acts like she is single. Why are you still married to her? No consequences to her actions equals no motivation to change. Clearly she has very little respect for you. If you do not respect yourself then who will?

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Man, she's cheating on you BIG TIME, probably during the whole marriage, I suggest you get a lawyer and drop this whatever...... I hope you two don't have children. Do the best you can to protect your house and assets for her.

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