markman Posted September 18, 2006 Share Posted September 18, 2006 Have you ever been in a relationship where dealbreakers popped up later? Like for example it turns out she does not want you to ride your motorcycle anymore but you have no intentions to ever stop riding your motorcycle? Do you break up over things like that? My girlfriend is very scared of me getting killed or hurt, especially since she has seen motorcycle accidents first hand due to her profession. What bugs me that she is not open for any kind of compromise. I could agree to riding it only occasianally around town and not get on the freeway but she would not even give me that bone. This is really a difficult one, do I love her more than riding my bike? Yes, but I don't see why I can't have both. I am also starting to wonder whether this is a character pattern that will spread to other issues. Link to post Share on other sites
SoCalCatman72 Posted September 19, 2006 Share Posted September 19, 2006 Like the famous biker shirt says; "My wife said either I stop riding, or she's leaving me............I wonder how she's doing." I had the same problem with my ex wife. I compromised by taking a Motorcycle Safety Foundation riders course and investing in about $5,000 worth of leather, armor, boots, gloves, top of the line helmet, etc. Link to post Share on other sites
littlepiggy1 Posted September 19, 2006 Share Posted September 19, 2006 Oh yeah, that was the case with my ex. I laid everything out for her early on, but she gradually took issue with certain things during the course of the relationship. Each singular thing wasn't a dealbreaker, but eventually they added up... Link to post Share on other sites
Craig Posted September 19, 2006 Share Posted September 19, 2006 My girlfriend is very scared of me getting killed or hurt, especially since she has seen motorcycle accidents first hand due to her profession.Does she call them 'donor-cycles'? Link to post Share on other sites
superconductor Posted September 19, 2006 Share Posted September 19, 2006 It's pretty standard issue stuff, I'm afraid. People often get married to partners in hopes that their partners will change, but more often than not the change doesn't happen. Link to post Share on other sites
littlekitty Posted September 19, 2006 Share Posted September 19, 2006 Seeing the effects up close and personal, may well have worked to change her mind over a period of time. Also if she see's herself settling down and marrying you, perhaps she's concerned about being left a widow with 3 children due to a bike accident. It's a tricky one, as I can understand her fears. But all the same, the movement of the goal posts is hard to swallow. Link to post Share on other sites
littlepiggy1 Posted September 19, 2006 Share Posted September 19, 2006 It's pretty standard issue stuff, I'm afraid. People often get married to partners in hopes that their partners will change, but more often than not the change doesn't happen. Reminds me of a saying I heard somewhere: "Men marry women hoping they never change, while women marry men hoping they will change." Link to post Share on other sites
rckt365 Posted September 20, 2006 Share Posted September 20, 2006 This fear of motorcycles that people have is just ridiculous, we are not talking a heroine addiction or sky-diving without a parachute here ! Are you asking to much to have her and the motorbiking hobby - absolutely not. I know it's easy to say and all - but really, if biking is a big part of your life? then in essence, eliminating that from your life is really removing a part of WHO you are. Doesn't she like WHO you are ? Ask her that ! Link to post Share on other sites
Sally00 Posted September 20, 2006 Share Posted September 20, 2006 I can understand how she feels about that. It's not safe at all. Would you want to spend your life with a motorcycle or someone you love... Link to post Share on other sites
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