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married man doesnt want me to have a bf


buzzie2

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I'll try to make this question short. Well I am friends with a married man. He was throwing a party and I was invited. Everyone else that was invited is married or dating someone. I had been single for like forever, and I finally found a date to bring to the party. Why my married friend found out he got upset and told me I couldnt bring my date. When I asked him why his excuse was he didnt want any strangers in his house. Also another time I told him that my ex bf wanted me back and he got this really jealous look on his face. If I talk about guys at all he gets jealous. He is married so I don't understand this. Can anyone give me some advice?

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He has NO right to put that restriction on you as he is MARRIED and has a wife.

 

He wants you to be at his beck and call 24/7. Meanwhile, he can do what he wants at home with his wife. (Go read afew threads in the OW/OM section)

He wants to have his cake and eat it too.

 

DO you want to be in a romantic relationship with a married man? What good can he do for you, other than hurt you and make you a second choice? He isn't going to leave his wife, ever...He'll just make you believe he will ... One day...Sorry to be blunt but after reading many threads in the OW forum, I can tell you the outcome of your situation right now. If it isn't too serious, GET OUT now before he breaks your heart.

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LucreziaBorgia

Being married has nothing to do with his jealousy over you. He's jealous over you, because you represent something to him that nothing to do with his W. You are there to fill the 'OW' type needs. Since the W doesn't fill the same role as you do, he is not content with just her. He needs you both to fill two different sets of needs (sounds like the classic cakeman). There is little you can do to change this. You will have to decide what you want to do: stay with a cakeman who will stunt your emotional and relationship growth potential with others so that you can continue to settle for half while he gets it all and then some - or leave the relationship.

 

If you want to stand your ground, tell him that as soon as he shows you signed and notarized divorce papers and a lease on his new place, then and ONLY then will you even consider the notion of monogamy with him. Otherwise, if he gets cake - you do too. Period.

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You're just "friends" with him? umm, sounds like a little more than friends to me. Either way, he's married and has no control or say in what you do - whether it's with another man or not. I say put him in his place!

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clearly you are not just friends and everything lucrezia says is dead right. he's being controlling and a cake man. and you are letting him do it, altho you are questioning this, which is good. you have a gut feeling this is not right. he has no right whatsoever to put any restrictions on you. he is married. period.

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