9089 Posted August 7, 2019 Share Posted August 7, 2019 So here’s the deal: Met a woman last week, and we hit off right away. Everything felt great and on the 3rd meetup we got intimate. Then the weekend came along and I asked her if she had plans friday nite. She told me she couldn’t see me. Fair game. Then the next day she went to town with a friend. She knew I was busy but asked me to come round multiple times. I couldn’t make it. Then the next day I had a day with friends which she knew about, but asked her to hang out in the PM. She then told me she had a family dinner. No worries, so I extended my hangout time with friends. Later that night she texted me to see how my day gone by, and also asked what my plans were this week. I told her I was down to meetup. Remember we only knew eachother for 7 days.. What happened next that all of a sudden she went totally berserk on me for meeting up with my fruends, and not putting her first, also not taking the time off to see her friend when she invited me along. A big discussion followed and I apologized but in her eyes it was already too late. I had completely destroyed her emotionally and put my friends first.. Did I miss something here? She told me I had done too much damage to ever recover from this. I didn’t want to lose her and expressed how I felt. But that didn’t make much sense.. She also blamed me for being disrespectfull in forgetting to send good morning texts and not turning on my read receipts and constant asking how her day was.. was I eith a controll freak? Link to post Share on other sites
SophieG Posted August 7, 2019 Share Posted August 7, 2019 Jesus... you dodged a bullet. I mean... you’ve known her a week, you’re not at a point where she should come first, far from it. And the lack of « Good morning » texts and the Read Confirmation are no where near disrespectful. If she’s hurt by that little, can you imagine who she deals with big problems?! If I were you, I’d forget about her and find someone who’s more stable emotionally... seriously!! Link to post Share on other sites
schlumpy Posted August 7, 2019 Share Posted August 7, 2019 I suspect that she was deeper into a relationship then you and took your excuses to not see her (after sex on the 3rd date) as a brushoff. Once she convinced herself that that's what was happening she decided on a pre-emptive strike. Possibly she was influenced by a prior relationship event from her past and that accounts for the over-the-top reaction. Be prepared to grovel for a while if you want her to accept you back. If not, move on. It was probably for the best. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Flame Aura Posted August 7, 2019 Share Posted August 7, 2019 If this is how she is after 7 days then imagine after 7 weeks.. or 7 months.. etc.. Move on to the next one. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Sam2020 Posted August 7, 2019 Share Posted August 7, 2019 Ugh, I don't understand why some people think that having sex with someone means it's an exclusive relationship. And her expectations for having known you for only a week are OTT! Dang that's needy and insecure. Be thankful that you found out early on. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Versacehottie Posted August 8, 2019 Share Posted August 8, 2019 Control freak. Is she joking that after 7 days of knowing you and how many dates---one???---to say that you need have your read receipts on is a joke!!!! Wow! No way. Petty, controlling, selfish, delusional. Nope! move on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted August 8, 2019 Share Posted August 8, 2019 She cray cray, you should have given her the button the min she started in on ya. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author 9089 Posted August 8, 2019 Author Share Posted August 8, 2019 She blamed me for putting my friends first. I’m just very confused how a girl can even think of this after only a week.. After reading all this I blocked her. Then she went wild and told us it was only about me.. I did unblock her, she became very disrespectfull. But she will feel what she has lost.. Just cannot believe why such a nice thing as dating or getting to know eachother has to turn out so dramatic. I never judged her for who she is, but she constantly did me.. Thanks for all the replies. That helped! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted August 8, 2019 Share Posted August 8, 2019 (edited) This is a prime example of what I mean when I talk about people expecting devoting from the first glance--which is HIGHLY UNREALISTIC Did I miss something here? Yeah! That big huge nuclear warhead she launched at your head. Good on you. She told me I had done too much damage to ever recover from this. I didn’t want to lose her and expressed how I felt. But that didn’t make much sense.. She also blamed me for being disrespectfull in forgetting to send good morning texts and not turning on my read receipts and constant asking how her day was.. was I eith a controll freak? Boy! Lose. Her. With a quickness. In fact, block her. She is not psychologically sound. I did unblock her, she became very disrespectfull She lost respect for you for caving and unblocking her. Put her back on block and if she acts out, call the police on her. Edited August 8, 2019 by kendahke 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author 9089 Posted August 9, 2019 Author Share Posted August 9, 2019 One thing I don’t really get is that now I’m back onto the dating site and she found out, obviously she is still there now started texting me again but still blames me for being on there. I told her I thought you didnt want me so I walked away.. She wished me all the best but still seeks contact.. Shame I did really like her Link to post Share on other sites
chillii Posted August 9, 2019 Share Posted August 9, 2019 Yeah , think you'd be best listening to the women here tbh , they usually have a pretty good nose for a woman that's trouble. Anyway , think you've done the right thing and yourself a big favor. lt is a shame and it's weird how often these people can have so much else that you might really like otherwise. But having that crap thrown at ya so early in man, not a good sign and only the beginning l'd say too. Link to post Share on other sites
Saracena Posted August 9, 2019 Share Posted August 9, 2019 I've read your post a few times (as thought I was missing something) and I can't see any evidence at all of your putting your friends first. Sure she turned you down, for one reason and another, on a few occasions, as well! Crazy. So this type of irrational behaviour would be a major turn-off for me. Yes, you did the right thing OP. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Saracena Posted August 9, 2019 Share Posted August 9, 2019 Probably she was influenced by a prior relationship event from her past and that accounts for the over-the-top reaction.. Could well be true. Or friend may have been egging her on a bit! Even so, people who exhibit this type of volatile behaviour are best avoided! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author 9089 Posted August 9, 2019 Author Share Posted August 9, 2019 Yea and it sucks, do still like her. Nothing happened, but she keeps saying I can never recover from this. She is the best ever and I have lost.. pure crazy Link to post Share on other sites
chillii Posted August 9, 2019 Share Posted August 9, 2019 What doe she mean , she can't recover from this , or you can't recover from this ? Sounds like she thinks she can't recover from her going off her nut at you because of the terrible things you did, when you didn't do anything, you tried to be as accommodating as possible. At any rate , there might still be option B with you feeling the way you do , if your game, give it another try ? lt'll probably go the same way it did the first time as it usually does with someone like that buttttt, never know. She might decide to become logical . ps, but at least you will know for sure. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 9089 Posted August 10, 2019 Author Share Posted August 10, 2019 Well she went wild on me for doing the things above. I asked (stupid I know) for a second chance and she told me I ****ed up for myself. I had to chose her instead of my friends.. How short sighted can you be, but that’s how it went. I don’t get why she is still texting me updating how her day is yada yada... We both on the dating site. She never deleted her profile I did. I dont want to date I want her.. I never judged her for anything, she constantly blames me... I never experienced any of this before.. but all the help was very welcome. Thank you for that! Link to post Share on other sites
schlumpy Posted August 10, 2019 Share Posted August 10, 2019 I asked (stupid I know) for a second chance and she told me I ****ed up for myself. I had to chose her instead of my friends. We both on the dating site. She never deleted her profile I did. I dont want to date I want her.. I never judged her for anything, she constantly blames me... I never experienced any of this before.. but all the help was very welcome. Thank you for that! You want her and now you know what you have to do to have her. Get rid of your friends. Isolate yourself so that you can become totally emotionally dependent on her. You can trust her to do the right thing for you. Of course she will have her own "friends" as well as the new friends she makes on her dating site but damn it, you want her. Isn't love about sacrifice? Your sacrifice? Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted August 10, 2019 Share Posted August 10, 2019 Seems like you do want to try and salvage the new relationship. I'm not sure why, she sounds a little scary. If she creates this much drama over a 7 day period of knowing each other, I hate to think of what she'll be like later. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Versacehottie Posted August 10, 2019 Share Posted August 10, 2019 I admit i'm confused as to what is going on now...so is she actively trying to be back in your life and you are allowing it/wanting it as well? She is a wreck, unstable, controlling and isolating-type. You should not pursue this. I'm 99.9% sure you will regret it if you do. You might have moments of a high right at the beginning while she takes you through her push/pull routine and while she makes you "less" than her and berates you so that you consciously try to get "another chance" or show her how great you really are but ultimately you will be miserable if you are ever in a relationship with this toxic person. Run. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 9089 Posted August 14, 2019 Author Share Posted August 14, 2019 Well, she started contacting me again and the good soul I am I thought let’s give her another chance. She totally went crazy over numerous things all over again. Said I wasnt trustworthy and many other nasty comments. She infact be ame so nasty I told her to leave. She later told me to never contact her again. She blocked me on socials but not phone and she had some sad text saying “I wished things would be different but its what it is”. Was I dating a narcissist? I stayed calm all the times and heard on her rage. I can’t believe it still.. such a waste Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted August 14, 2019 Share Posted August 14, 2019 Well, she started contacting me again and the good soul I am I thought let’s give her another chance. She totally went crazy over numerous things all over again. Said I wasnt trustworthy and many other nasty comments. She infact be ame so nasty I told her to leave. She later told me to never contact her again. She blocked me on socials but not phone and she had some sad text saying “I wished things would be different but its what it is”. Was I dating a narcissist? I stayed calm all the times and heard on her rage. I can’t believe it still.. such a waste Why. Is. She. Not. Blocked? Just about everyone here told you she was crazy. The waste isn't with her: it's with you not recognizing a serious problem throwing up all over your shoes. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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