Quiet date

[Blueyes2791]

Hi

I’m been dating this girl for 3 weeks and we’ve already seen each other like 12 times. The last date we had she came over and we painted. It’s something she loves to do. She finds it very therapeutic. We didn’t have any fights whatsoever but this was the first day that we’ve had where it’s been really quiet. Is this a bad sign? I thought during the date even though we aren’t talking it was still peaceful just to be with her. This happenes, right? It shouldn’t end anything? Just nervous cuz I really like her

[schlumpy]

I think you are fine. It would be very difficult to hold a conversation and do some serious painting especially in the detail work. I think silence was appropriate but make sure you are as close to her as possible and that there are frequent breaks.

 

 

Best Wishes

[PRW]

but this was the first day that we’ve had where it’s been really quiet. Is this a bad sign? I thought during the date even though we aren’t talking it was still peaceful just to be with her. This happenes, right? It shouldn’t end anything? Just nervous cuz I really like her

Your uneasiness about it worries me more than the "quiet". Learn to be comfortable with "quiet". Maybe she feels comfortable with you enough that she doesn't feel she has to be saying something the whole time. Do married people jabber constantly? No. One is dong something in the kitchen while the other reading the newspaper on the couch or watching TV. One is out running errands while the other is tinkering out in the garage.

 

There is one negative,...12 time in the first 3 weeks. That is way excessive and could "burn out" the situation between you. One of the two could feel smothered,...I know I would.

[Lotsgoingon]

If you're going to have such a innovative and cool date as painting, then you have to add something ... words. "Hey, I'm enjoying our quiet. How are you doing?"

 

Sounds like a great time to me ... But you want to check in ... and that will be the case throughout the relationship ... though at some point you'll be able to read your partner better.

 

You can check in without words ... a quick kiss ... hug ... a smile ... but what you don't want to do is go through an evening that feels great ... and yet ... have hanging in the air ... "is this OK?"

 

Now to answer your question in general, yes quiet can be wonderful. Sounds like a lovely time ... But lose the worry ... Connect with her to confirm the next time ... a hug could connect ... a kiss ... you can also check in with her at the end of the night. "I really loved that," you could have said. And then she'll tell you about her feelings.

[Foxhall]

Agree with previous poster,

 

too quiet can be pretty awkward alright, but yes "checking in" and letting each other know you are still there should help,

 

just as an unusual generalisation, I find women who like painting, they have a star quality about them, can be very engaging and easy to open up too.

[smackie9]

Some quiet time together is good. It's not like you are doing nothing, you are sharing an activity...a friend of mine loves reading, and there are nights where him and his GF would just sit and read.

 

I feel when she paints, she in the zone...that's why she's finds it therapeutic. She can come over to my house and paint anytime lol....I hate painting!