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Guy I'm dating never texts me


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Old 12th April 2019, 11:01 AM   #16
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I really think he isn't ready for a relationship, and he could just be caught with stuff, you need to have a conversation about it, and if he keeps on you probably should look for someone more comitted, communication is crucial.

Last edited by LoveShack.org Moderator; 12th April 2019 at 8:59 PM.. Reason: quote removed
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Old 12th April 2019, 11:11 AM   #17
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Of everything you've said, I think the lack of texting is the least disconcerting. Some people just don't like to text just like some don't like to talk on the phone. You barely kiss and never in his car? Is he considering the priesthood? Keep going out with him because you have a good time and no one else to go out with? You can have a good time with a cousin. And no one else to go out with is not a reason to date someone. The right guy could be out there but you haven't met him cuz you were our with Mr. Robot. The only justification I can think of for his behavior is just coming off a painful breakup. He may or may not be interested in you or going out with you for the same cuz he has no one else to go out with either. But he's clearly not an affectionate man. And the lack of it is leaving you unsatisfied and insecure. Don't waist anymore time tring to figure him out. Put yourself out there and meet other guys. You deserve affection! You deserve passion! Don't settle for less!
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Old 12th April 2019, 5:22 PM   #18
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He knows the "game" pretty well, which is good.

Trust me, he is doing you two a favour by not initiating texts with you because I'm sure this guy KNOWS the moment he "loses" it, which means throwing himself into a texting frenzy, that's when you, ironically, get bored and dump his sorry a**.
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Old 13th April 2019, 10:14 PM   #19
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Thanks so much for the replies.


I understand everything you all are saying. I just don't understand because we have a good time on our dates. I just find this to be so interesting and ridiculous. We're in our late 20's, not sure why he doesn't want a relationship.

Would any of you still go out if you have a good time on the dates, I am definitely keeping my options open though and looking for new guys. It is just really hard for me to find someone to date.
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Old 15th April 2019, 11:16 AM   #20
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Originally Posted by bathtub-row View Post
I have no idea, and neither do you. There could be a number of reasons and most of them aren't encouraging - he has another life, he's only loosely interested, he has other girlfriends or a wife. Whatever his reason, his behavior bothers you, yet you continue to tolerate it. If you intend to stay with him, then learn to be ok with it. If you hate it that much, then walk away. It's really that simple. Don't waste your time trying to second-guess other people.
You could talk to him about it, rather than either put up with it or walk away.
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Old 15th April 2019, 12:02 PM   #21
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Listen, he's having a good time in the moment when he's on a date with you PERIOD. He's at least content to go out with you here and there but he's not so crazy over you as to feel like he wants to keep in contact in between. A guy who is really into a woman will call or text at least a little bit anyway in between seeing you.

I'm a little suspect about a guy who travels over an hour to see a woman and disappears in between. That suggests to me that he is married or has a girlfriend and has women on the side in different areas so as not to risk getting caught locally by them and/or being seen by friends, etc.
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Old 15th April 2019, 12:28 PM   #22
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Originally Posted by Spring1234 View Post
Thanks so much for the replies.


I understand everything you all are saying. I just don't understand because we have a good time on our dates. I just find this to be so interesting and ridiculous. We're in our late 20's, not sure why he doesn't want a relationship.
More than likely because he has a lot of options and isn't ready to make a choice yet. He's having fun playing the field. He has time before he settles down.
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Old 15th April 2019, 12:51 PM   #23
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I just don't understand because we have a good time on our dates.
those two things are not mutually exclusive. He can have a good time on your dates and not feel the need to be in contact with you until the next time he takes you out.


Quote:
I just find this to be so interesting and ridiculous. We're in our late 20's, not sure why he doesn't want a relationship.
Because he's in his late 20's and doesn't need to settle down or be in a relationship on yours or anyone else's terms other than his own.

More than likely, the reason why is because there is someone else higher up on his priority list who gets those texts who can jack his life up worse than you can, being a hour away and basically held at bay until he feels like getting around to you.
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Old 15th April 2019, 1:01 PM   #24
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Not everyone likes to do the "maintenance" texting, which is dead boring. He probably doesn't like doing it and doesn't want to get the cutsie "I miss you" stuff started. It's true he also may be dating other people or still involved with his ex.

If I were you, I wouldn't put any priority on texting but I would definitely keep dating other guys when you can because there's no exclusivity agreement here. So enjoy seeing him when you see him and keep dating other guys.

The biggest red flag I see is how long it took him to kiss you. That's not normal when you're dating. It might be normal if you were just friends running into one another, but not if you're dating. So something is off with him. Just enjoy seeing him when you can, forget about him trying to keep up with you, dump him if he doesn't cancel on you when sick next time, and keep dating other guys as usual.
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Old 16th April 2019, 3:13 PM   #25
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Personally I would quickly lose interest in someone I go out with once a week or two and barely text with or call, etc. in between. He may enjoy the time on the dates with you, but like another poster said, the fact that it took him so long to kiss you, and his lack of regular contact... shows he's not excited about you. He is giving the bare minimum to keep you on rotation. Sorry.

The distance creates a barrier of separation where he can (and is, no doubt) doing the same thing with other women. Many men, and women, no matter their age and how much you would 'think' that they would or should want a relationship, are not. They're happy to casually date and offer no level of exclusivity, connection, or commitment.

If you're dating other guys or are open to it as you say, I would drop this one in a heartbeat because it seems like such a massive waste of time.
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Old 16th April 2019, 3:20 PM   #26
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Would any of you still go out if you have a good time on the dates, I am definitely keeping my options open though and looking for new guys. It is just really hard for me to find someone to date.
No. I would only want to go out with someone who was really excited about being with me. That means contact and communication very regularly, and also passion and excitement about kissing me, wanting to be physical, etc. Another poster said it, a guy who is crazy about a girl would never let that much time pass between contact. He would want to kiss her right away. He would be building up the momentum, not canceling, calling, making sure he doesn't lose her to someone else. He has a low level of interest. He enjoys your company as an occasional dinner date companion.

I know it sucks having trouble finding someone, but trust me, you can do a heck of a lot better than this. The time you do spend going out with him seems like it would be much better spent directed towards meeting someone who is really excited about you. When that happens you won't have to worry about how often he is contacting you, because he'll be contacting you all the time.
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Old 16th April 2019, 3:28 PM   #27
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Yeah, but exited about "being with you" is not the same as excited about texting you.
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Old 17th April 2019, 2:28 AM   #28
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But why would he your acting like a gf but he knows you aren't one and don't wanna be one.
You still wanna go out with other guys your not sleeping together your just casual friends.
l wouldn't be texting you any more than that if at all either., what for ?

And apart the obvious there , doubt he's interested in more anyway.

Last edited by chillii; 17th April 2019 at 2:32 AM..
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Old 17th April 2019, 3:03 AM   #29
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You say you 2 are in your late 20s and have been dating 6 months, yet you have not slept with him and don't plan on it. I think you have your answer right there. He's not getting a whole lot out of this relationship, because a 29 year old male is horny as hell.
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Old 21st April 2019, 2:36 PM   #30
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Holy crap how did I miss that. Yes not sleeping with a 29 year old guy for 6 months and you wonder why the texting is lacking? I'm without words....
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