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Do I have a right here? (short question)


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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:22 PM   #1
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Do I have a right here? (short question)

Hey all - I like someone who currently has a FWB relationship going on with someone else right now. Do I have any right to politely ask her to refrain from doing that stuff until she makes a decision on whether or not she wants to date me? I know we technically aren't going out, but I think it would be respectful if she held off on the fooling around until I got an answer either way, ya know? I would do that for her so I could gain a clearer perspective on what I wanted to do.
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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:25 PM   #2
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IMO If this Girl was all about you to begin with you wouldn't need to ask her to stop having sex with someone else, she wouldn't be doing it... in fact you wouldn't know about someone else because she wouldn't have told you about it...

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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:27 PM   #3
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You have no rights until you have done the deed.

Then you can tell her how you feel.
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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:27 PM   #4
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Why would you think that she owed you something if she has not even indicated that she likes you? Just curious.
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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:27 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally posted by Merin
IMO If this Girl was all about you to begin with you wouldn't need to ask her to stop having sex with someone else, she wouldn't be doing it... in fact you wouldn't know about someone else because she wouldn't have told you about it...

My 2 Cent's
Well, we've just started talking. She hasn't had a chance to really like me yet, but she definitely wants to get to know me better. I'm just not sure I'm keen on getting to know a girl who is having sex with someone else. I'd like her to hit the "pause" button on that while we talk more.
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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:29 PM   #6
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If you tell her to stop the FWB situation she will show you the door..
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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:29 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally posted by my_manda
Why would you think that she owed you something if she has not even indicated that she likes you? Just curious.
Well, I was just thinking it would be a courteous thing to do. If someone liked me, I would temporarily suspend the FWB while I looked into the new possibility.
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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:29 PM   #8
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i agree with merin but at the end of the day, you have to do what you're comfortable with. apparently this is a dealbreaker for you.
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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:30 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally posted by WhereSpiritsRoam
Well, we've just started talking. She hasn't had a chance to really like me yet, but she definitely wants to get to know me better. I'm just not sure I'm keen on getting to know a girl who is having sex with someone else. I'd like her to hit the "pause" button on that while we talk more.
Honestly... again WSR IMO IF this Girl was interested in dating you there isn't any way you would even know about this other arrangement she's got going on... while I'm not saying she doesn't want to get to know you better, IMO it's more as a friend than a potential romantic partner.. think about it, IF or WHEN you have a romantic interest in someone you DON'T start telling that person that you're having sex with someone else....
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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:34 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally posted by WhereSpiritsRoam
If someone liked me, I would temporarily suspend the FWB while I looked into the new possibility.
Then doesn't that give you a clear indication about where you stand with her?

To answer your original question: No, you don't. You also shouldn't have to. And if you DID have to ask her to stop f*cking other dudes, she's not worth your effort anyway.
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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:34 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally posted by Merin
IF or WHEN you have a romantic interest in someone you DON'T start telling that person that you're having sex with someone else....
Yeah I agree with this totally
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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:36 PM   #12
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FWB

if she already told you she is banging another dude then she has no romantic interest in you whatsoever....

and FYI, a FWB situation is usually created when a girl likes a dude a lot but he does not want to commit to her, so she just settles for sex.

good day
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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:49 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally posted by A Fly onThe Wall
If you tell her to stop the FWB situation she will show you the door..
I don't mind taking that chance because I don't want to talk to her if she's going to continue having sex with him on the side.
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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:50 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally posted by Merin
Honestly... again WSR IMO IF this Girl was interested in dating you there isn't any way you would even know about this other arrangement she's got going on... while I'm not saying she doesn't want to get to know you better, IMO it's more as a friend than a potential romantic partner.. think about it, IF or WHEN you have a romantic interest in someone you DON'T start telling that person that you're having sex with someone else....
She never actually told me, but it's posted on her online blog. Don't know if that makes any difference.
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Old 2nd August 2005, 4:53 PM   #15
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Re: FWB

Quote:
Originally posted by alphamale
if she already told you she is banging another dude then she has no romantic interest in you whatsoever....

and FYI, a FWB situation is usually created when a girl likes a dude a lot but he does not want to commit to her, so she just settles for sex.

good day
alpha
She might like him, but from the facts I have gathered, it's a one way street here. He has no intention of being with her. The question is, then, will she stop banging him if she starts falling for me?
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