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Too hot to trot. True story.


Dating Dating, courting, or going steady? Things not working out the way you had hoped? Stand up on your soap box and let us know what's going on!

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Old 10th March 2019, 7:20 PM   #16
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Well, I think I have to give you the same advice I give women whose car breaks down on the road. On here, I mostly tell guys to talk to the women who make a point to talk to them and are friendly.

With you, I'm going to tell you to choose rather than take a chance on the ones who push to be with you.

Also, I'm glad you're doing salsa. Great for meeting people.

If you do online, say in your profile that you are kind of shy and awkward and wouldn't mind if the woman took her time getting to know you.

I dunno. You say you've tried and failed to conceal your splendor with a beard, but it worked for the best looking guy I know. He got tired of women throwing themselves at him and becoming problematic,and he has a lot of substance, but they didn't care about that so much, so by God, he grew an unsightly beard atop that national monument of a face. He wanted people to not make assumptions about him. He wanted people to be interested in what he did, not what his sadly destroyed face looked like. The selfish idiot.

So your other problem, the one you've only been able to solve through your alliance with Germany, surely there is some American basketball player who has his own line of condoms available worldwide.

Putting on condoms is generally kind of awkward -- because of the timing. Do it yourself and practice it a lot first.

As far as being good in bed, you can get away with not being that good if you're that good looking, which is why you shouldn't grow the beard at least until you've mastered the craft. Honestly, the old flame, no good in bed. I just got off from looking at him and being next to him mostly. But if you stay with someone awhile, ask them what they like and then do it until they REALLY like it. Simple really. Don't just hit the bases and stop.

Also, if you really are nervous on a first meeting or first date, come out and say it. Say, "First dates make me so nervous!" They make everyone nervous. It will be the first thing you bond over.
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Old 10th March 2019, 8:53 PM   #17
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This whole thing doesnt make sense. We(Women) flick our hair at you, compliment you and all try to get your attention but soon as you talk, we run?? Why would we do that? It's completely contradictory.

Because you look like a player? Then why do we try to get your attention at the first place if we dont like players?? Also when you are hot enough, many of us don't care if you are a player. Hey, we like sex too.

If I have to think what can possibly be so turned off by a really hot guy, then maybe, you somehow act/talk feminine?( I know a guy who is so big and masculy but soon as he moves and talks, he turns a bit feminine and it's a turn off for me) You sound terrified?(since you have low self esteem) You have bad breath? You have bad teeth? You have bad smell?

Really cant think of anything else that isn't bizarre..
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Old 11th March 2019, 9:15 PM   #18
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I really enjoyed your tale of woebegone cluelessness. I am not being mean, I can actually relate to it in some twisted fashion. I had women throw themselves at me and was clueless as to what to do with that. I was so pathetic. Still am in a lot of ways. But I've certainly gotten better at the personality while unfortunately the approaches have gotten far too infrequent since the follicles started falling out and the ones that stay turn gray. Sigh. If I'd only known what I knew now then. ANYWAY...

If this is happening to you so frequently, I'm with Frus, something horrific must be happening right after you utter those first words. No way every woman you meet is going to run off acting crazy as soon as you acknowledge her.

You are obviously a guy with a great sense of humor. You need to use that! Make a joke or witty observation, just do something lower key than the licking of your lips, flicking your tongue in between your fingers, grabbing your crotch, or whatever insanity you're doing as an intro.
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Old 12th March 2019, 3:16 AM   #19
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Have you tried getting a face tattoo?


But really, I understand the whole drawing attention while being unapproachable thing. What I learned is to not pay attention to any of it. The interactions that are supposed to happen will happen naturally and thus feel natural.
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Old 12th March 2019, 7:42 PM   #20
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Thanks for stating the counter argument. Yes, maybe I'm deluded, maybe not. However, I have spent a great deal of my life not believing the evidence of my senses and ended up an emotional eunuch. Ever since I decided to buy into the narrative that I am super hot; purely for the sake of science you understand; the world suddenly makes sense. And more importantly when I take action based on my new world view, the feedback I get makes sense. I still routinely drop the ball, but do so for understandable and fixable reasons. And the ball is being moved downfield, sometimes yards, sometimes inches. Its still a running game; I have no wide receivers. Which is bollocks, but hey-ho progress is progress. It's not just some nebulous environmeint of WTF anymore.


"Because you look like a player? Then why do we try to get your attention at the first place if we dont like players?? Also when you are hot enough, many of us don't care if you are a player. Hey, we like sex too."


Most of what I'm describing is unconscious or at least semi-conscious and fired by hormones rather than reason. Hormones are just naturally occuring drugs and women get really hormonal around me (men get pretty pumped-up too incidently.) So from my perspective, I'm dealing with drugged up people responding to deep, instinctive, patterns of behaviour. Not rational beings making conscious descisions. Add alcohol and it gets messy real quick.



Like on Saturday night I was out on the town. I go into a bar, a woman is dancing with her back to me, she bumps into me and turns around. She looks really shocked like she's seen a ghost, but real quick, I start dancing with her like a mean it. She keeps taking her glasses off and checking me out like she can't believe her eyes. After a couple of minutes of explicit encouragment from me she goes all-in. We're immediataly at it like a cheap 'n nasty hip-hop video. Short version, she ends up with her head up my T-shirt, comes face to face with my six pack, freaks out and sends a table and numerous drinks flying. She gets slung out. I leave her and her mate arguing with the bouncer. Not a lot of rationality on show here. BTW. I kept trying to pop the question, but things got out of hand very quickly. Welcome to my world.


In the pub we were in before, a woman is caressing, licking and kissing the fruit machine her friend is playing whilst giving me the heavy eye. I'm standing there dumbfounded wondering what she will do next, without realising that I'm what she wants to be doing next. She leaves disgusted, I'm speachless. I've seen a lot of weird ***** but this one is new and it was only 8.30pm for pity sake! But to be fair she was probably soberish and did seem to know what she was doing. I was just slow, slow, slow. But its fixable.


Then there was the woman who was giving me the strong eye at the music venue, but every time I tried to make a move, random blokes kept cutting me off, guys that I didn't know, had no reason to talk to me and had nothing to say. No clue. Unless they saw me coming a mile off of course. Can't be that, nah!



The women in the D&B club was a hooker, so I don't suppose she counts.


But the woman in the smoking area of the 80's club was doing whole deep-eye-contact-whilst-talking-very-very-fast-and-not-letting-me-get-a-word-in-whilst-gesticulating-wildly-in-my-face-thing. I would have assumed that she was coked up to to the gills if I hadn't seen her talking very calmly to her friends just a moment before. Friends, incidently, who kept giving me those very special nods and winks. I only wanted a light for my cigarette; which I didn't get. I staggered inside exhausted and alone.


This is a fairly normal Saturday night for me. Welcome to my world.
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Old 13th March 2019, 1:55 AM   #21
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Honestly I dont understand a word you just said...either they are all crazy or you are the crazy one..
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Old 13th March 2019, 6:24 AM   #22
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Honestly I dont understand a word you just said...either they are all crazy or you are the crazy one..

Nobody's crazy. I'm just the human equivalent of a unicorn. Nobody knows how to relate.


I went to a music festival last summer which is renowned for being where all the beautiful people go. One reason I went was to see if I could find a situation where I wasn't the center of attention. I actually found a few where I had to share it. I felt strangly hurt and upset by this. My turf! Mine, mine, mine! The male ego, so delicate. But wasn't blown away at any point which was a surprise (over 50 remember.) Not what I was expecting.



But it was interesting to see what other hot guys do in the wild. They normally have a crowd of male friends cheering them on. It was rare to see two hotties together, that male ego again. They tend to dress down, which was a surprise and often behave like louts (because they can.) But not always, the better dressed ones are often guys who appear to be the more insecure types like me.



Fun field trip I spent most of the time "hiding" behind shades, hat and big big hear phones. As if. I only came out at night, and no, I did'nt get laid. But just dropped the ball in many, many embarrassing ways. Like at the dance stage. I'm taking off my hoodie and I hear several female voices, "OK, here we go! Lets have a look! Ohhh! Mmmmmn! OMG!" I freeze, drop my hoodie and try to pick it up without looking back and end up almost falling over. Sniggering from behind me. I wait a while hoping that they will clear off, bright red and ears burning. I think the coast is clear, take a deep breath and relax. I forget the episode momentarily and casually look around. They are still there! Three blondes giving me the the biggest eyes I've ever seen. This is one of the least embarrassing episodes. Jesus, but I'm useless.
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Old 13th March 2019, 9:25 AM   #23
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I want pictures. I think we all want pictures.
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Old 13th March 2019, 9:55 AM   #24
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I want pictures. I think we all want pictures.
Yeah, 'course you do. Why don't I just paint a big target on my back?
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Old 13th March 2019, 10:35 AM   #25
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no I call bull poop-cakka
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Old 13th March 2019, 10:37 AM   #26
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Plenty of room there, it's V shaped 😜
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Old 13th March 2019, 10:39 AM   #27
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no I call bull poop-cakka
I'll show you mine if you show me your's 😘
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Old 13th March 2019, 12:45 PM   #28
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I think you are completely misreading the women around you.

Nice fantasy, though.

Last edited by ExpatInItaly; 13th March 2019 at 12:49 PM..
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Old 13th March 2019, 1:14 PM   #29
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I think you are completely misreading the women around you.

Nice fantasy, though.

Yes, lovely fantasy. What am I missing?
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Old 13th March 2019, 1:29 PM   #30
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The face tattoo I reckon
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