Slapsh0t Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 Hi guys. This might sound really small but it's been bothering me a lot. So I've been dating my boyfriend for exactly three weeks now. Valentines day was yesterday, and since we've really only known each other for 2 months, I decided to get him something small. To my surprise he shows up with two bags full of stuff, including a sweater that I casually said I wanted and the nicest, most personal homemade card with a picture of us and a long, sweet letter attached. I feel terrible, considering my letter to him was short, cliche and written on a piece of printing paper. He liked his gift a lot but I feel like it was nothing compared to the effort he put in his. Now I just feel inadequate and like I don't deserve him (I already have a pretty low opinion of myself and a high opinion of him). I really, really like him, and want him to feel loved and appreciated. How do I stop feeling bad about this?? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 You recognize that your gift was heartfelt & appropriate. He went overboard & that would scare me. You have to wonder whether he has boundary issues. Just be a loving sweet GF . Show him you care by your actions. In time as you approach the next holiday, talk beforehand about expectations & maybe budget. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 Don't sweat the small stuff, while it sounds like he gave you too much you shouldn't feel you didn't give enough... Food and sex... if he got either then you gave him more than he was looking for.... I seriously doubt he is looking at your gift and going "crap.." people who give a lot like him aren't expecting a lot... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Cersei Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 Well March 14th is Steak and Blow job day. Just saying!:bunny::bunny: 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Fair Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 His gift was a bit much. Yours was more appropriate. I'd be more concerned about my level of self esteem if I were you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
OpenBook Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 Just cook the guy a nice dinner and screw his brains out. Men are simple creatures. This is EXACTLY what I was going to suggest. Trust me, he will eat it up. Literally! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Happy Lemming Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 Food and sex... if he got either then you gave him more than he was looking for.... Yep... sex was all I wanted for Valentines day. I made her a nice dinner, she loved her necklace and I got laid. WIN-WIN!! Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 I agree with those who say he gave too much and that would make me uneasy. Your gift sounds appropriate and perfectly nice. Link to post Share on other sites
Simple Logic Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 Just return the generosity. Buy Tickets for an event he would enjoy and take him. Link to post Share on other sites
LivingWaterPlease Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 I wouldn't worry about it a bit in your place. You can't possibly go through life gifting others exactly as they have gifted you. I received three gifts from my guy, one (very expensive) with a card and the other two ($40 and $100 respectively) each with a personal message from him on them. I got him nothing, not even a card. I don't feel a bit bad about the situation as I told him NOT to get me the gift he got me as it was inappropriately expensive. And I was also too busy to get him asgift and warned him ahead of time that he wouldn't get a card or gift from me. Link to post Share on other sites
Malin889 Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 His gift was a bit overboard for you dating such a short time. And putting a picture of you too on the card? I’d be more concerned about his overboard gift. Yours was perfectly appropriate. Why do not think so high of yourself? Think more of yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
GraceAndJoy Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 Now I just feel inadequate and like I don't deserve him (I already have a pretty low opinion of myself and a high opinion of him). I really, really like him, and want him to feel loved and appreciated. How do I stop feeling bad about this?? The reciprocity in gift-giving is not a sign whether or not you "deserve him." You guys just starting dating. Unequal ideas of what was appropriate is not surprising! If he was that attentive to you, he adores you! Be grateful, sweet, and affectionate...and that will be his gift in return Then, plan a surprise something when he least expects it. Find something small and cute and give it to him, or like others have said, cook for him or be intimate if y'all are at that stage... Everyone has a different love language and his may be gifts. You could both take the quiz (there are many online or read Gary Chapman's book) to learn more about one another's love languages and how to show and be shown love. It will help you understand each other more! Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 Surprise him this weekend wearing lingerie and romp his world. Link to post Share on other sites
gradh Posted February 18, 2019 Share Posted February 18, 2019 Well March 14th is Steak and Blow job day. Just saying!:bunny::bunny: Never heard of this before. It's hysterical!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Marc878 Posted February 18, 2019 Share Posted February 18, 2019 Never heard of this before. It's hysterical!!!! You really should get out more. Link to post Share on other sites
gradh Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 You really should get out more. You have no idea how true that statement is Link to post Share on other sites
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