LoveShack.org Community Forums

Reload this Page LoveShack.org Community Forums > Romantic > Dating

Would you accept this? Too ill to see me but has dinner with ex girlfriend


Dating Dating, courting, or going steady? Things not working out the way you had hoped? Stand up on your soap box and let us know what's going on!

Like Tree18Likes
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 28th January 2019, 6:35 AM   #1
New Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 6
Would you accept this? Too ill to see me but has dinner with ex girlfriend

I spent the weekend in another city helping a girlfriend through a difficult time. He knew this.

On Friday he was looking through old photos because he has to do a brief presentation about his life history at work. I was on the train and asked him to send me his favourite photo. He sends me a photo of him and his ex-girlfriend in Portugal. Apparently he thought it would be funny because my Mom now lives there.

On Sunday I'm coming back on the train to London and he texts saying "Iíd love to see you tonight but my cough isnít fully gone. I didnít have any issues with it last night but I am worried it might flare up again and keep you awake".

He does this all the time, says he wants to see me but already includes excuses at to why he might not be able too. Anyway, I told him that he should stay home, get some rest and hopefully cure that cough.

I called him when I got home and I found out he had just been out for dinner with his ex-girlfriend. The same one from the picture. They're friends. I then said, "oh cool, so you're ok enough to come over to mine?" And he said "no, I don't really want to catch anymore cold air. I think I should stay in".

Is this normal/nice behaviour? Would you accept it? Also, we have only been dating for 8-9 months!

Also, we're going to Mexico on Saturday for 2 weeks. What do I do? Do I go? Do I dump him? The trip cost so much money ...
nadineblack is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th January 2019, 6:44 AM   #2
Established Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 500
Girl! Drop him. Go to Mexico without him and have the time of your life. And find a man who would be happy to see you and not still stuck on his ex.
Curiousroxy86 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th January 2019, 7:08 AM   #3
Established Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 817
He wants to be with his ex. Let him. You don't need this. You can continue to have fun in Mexico, but just downgrade him in your heart and tell him. Then you start looking for a hotter guy.
Gretchen12 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th January 2019, 8:14 AM   #4
Established Member
 
Elswyth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 26,869
No.


(10 characters)
__________________
~Perfection is about accepting that we cannot control everything and letting go of some of our preconceived notions.~ -Spiritofnow-
Elswyth is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th January 2019, 8:22 AM   #5
Established Member
 
Eternal Sunshine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 11,652
I would dump him and go to Mexico by myself.



You are too easy-going. He thinks he can keep bailing from plans with no consequences, send you ex photo as his "favorite photo ever" etc. He has no respect for you and thinks he can get away with anything.
__________________
"Vision without execution is hallucination.Ē Thomas Edison
Eternal Sunshine is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th January 2019, 8:24 AM   #6
Established Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 9,258
Not sure why youíre with this clown. After reading your other thread and now this smack on your face, it should be enough for you to dump this guy.

Raise your standards.
__________________
One regret, my dear world, that I am determined not to have when I am lying on my deathbed is that I did not kiss you enough ~ Hafiz
Zahara is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th January 2019, 8:33 AM   #7
Established Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2018
Posts: 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by nadineblack View Post
Is this normal/nice behaviour? Would you accept it? Also, we have only been dating for 8-9 months!

Also, we're going to Mexico on Saturday for 2 weeks. What do I do? Do I go? Do I dump him? The trip cost so much money ...
It is not nice behavior at all. Showing you the picture of him and his ex is at best insensitive. Saying he can't go out, but spends time instead with his ex would be unacceptable to me. I'd question his honesty and his priorities. Sounds like both are lacking.

I'd be very direct. I'd say that I don't find it funny showing you pictures of him and his ex. I'd say it's very disappointing and hurtful that he said he couldn't go out, but spent time with his ex instead of you. I'd tell him you deserve better treatment than that.
ShadeOfGreen is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th January 2019, 10:11 AM   #8
Established Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 1,477
He sounds like a huge jerk.
Finding my way is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th January 2019, 10:22 AM   #9
New Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: Nigeria
Posts: 6
Conversation is one of the things that keep a relationship going. The best thing to do before the time for the mexico trip reaches is to try having a conversation with him. if he cannot come to you because of his so many excuses then do to him and talk to him. Tell him your doubts and the fact that you don't like the recent hang outs with his ex. From his response you know if dropping his ass is the best thing.
Nnam is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th January 2019, 11:11 AM   #10
Established Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 13,003
In what world could this possibly be considered nice or normal behaviour, OP?

I would dump this guy so fast his head would spin. He wants his ex more than he wants you.

Don't go to Mexico with him. He doesn't respect you whatsoever.
ExpatInItaly is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th January 2019, 11:37 AM   #11
Established Member
 
d0nnivain's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Northeastern USA
Posts: 32,744
Go to Mexico then end it when you get home.
d0nnivain is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th January 2019, 11:41 AM   #12
Established Member
 
smackie9's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Surrey BC Canada
Posts: 15,251
And make sure you dance with other men while you are there......
__________________

You are a fool if you believe that having each others passwords = trust.
smackie9 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th January 2019, 11:51 AM   #13
Established Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 1,228
I'd try to find a gf that could go to Mexico with you instead, and if that doesn't work I'd just cancel the trip and take the loss.

I wouldn't spend another minute with that clown.
olivetree is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th January 2019, 11:56 AM   #14
Established Member
 
bathtub-row's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 4,736
Tell this numbskull that it’s over between the two of you, gather up a friend and go to Mexico.
bathtub-row is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th January 2019, 6:16 PM   #15
Established Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Boston
Posts: 319
Respect yourself as you deserve better treatment and dump this bozo quickly.

Dump him and say adios, then head to Mexico alone.

If you paid for his ticket see if a friend can go with you.

Do not accept poor behavior from the people you date.

This guy has crappy boundaries and does not respect you.

I wish you the best
Juha is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

 

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
We can accept their shortcomings but they cant accept ours. batt Breaks and Breaking Up 4 29th December 2014 8:57 PM
Trying hard to accept the breakup and accept the fact that's he has changed [updates] geebelle Breaks and Breaking Up 66 16th July 2014 12:56 PM
soo ill guess ill have to see my ex on a party today... Pentel Coping 7 30th January 2010 7:54 AM
Is 'Dinner with a Friend' Code for "Dinner with a Woman' ? Is he cheating ? Nagini Cheating, Flirting, and Jealousy 83 10th March 2009 2:31 PM
dinner and a movie (or a movie and dinner??) huxley Dating 7 23rd February 2006 3:17 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 3:29 PM.

Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.


Copyright © 1997-2018 LoveShack.org. All Rights Reserved.