Any Hope left here, if so suggestions

[SGB8098]

My boyfriend and I have been together for over nine months now. I love and would like to see us continue our relation and see what may happen in the future. We have even talked about marriage and family as well.

 

My bday was in June he didn't get me a thing . All he did was give me a card saying I wish I could be here for your birthday. (I have never been in a relationship over my birthday and I am 25 years old)

He knew i was happy to share this day with someone that I genuinely love.

He is in the service and had a 2 week training event to go to. I totally understand. FOR Christmas he gave me jewelry, v-day diamond earing, totally blew me away. Along with every other day in my life he make s me feel like the luckiest woman in the world .

But he has not done a thing for my bday and he was here in town just too tired. I don't believe him , yet I did not fuss about it. We give each other cards on our monthly anniversary's On Tuesday is our 10th month. See, recently his mom has moved back in with him , he is financially covering for the both of them, he doesn't get along with his father and he is having problems with his knee. I have been supportive and trying to raise his spirits with affection love notes and such.

 

Last week I confronted him since he has been acting distant and not as emotionally there as he as in the past. He said he thought I was cheating on him. He said well you have been so busy and happy. ( I am a happy person that is how everyone knows me.I am not dragged down by others. )

 

Any ideas, suggestions to help me / us out please?

[Zaira]

I don't think you should have expected a gift on your birthday. At least he showed he was thinking of you. He's obviously got a lot on his plate at the moment, and maybe he needs your support a bit more, and maybe reassurance that you DO still love him, and he is the only one in your life.

[SGB8098]

I have honestly. I just would like to think up of something to do that is for specifically to prove that point . But , I had asked him if he had cheated on me. and i don't know we have a night at the Biltmore planned in aug and his bday is in aug so i am wanting to get him something even though he didn't et me anything but in a way that feel funky. But , i do love him.

We are in our mid-twenties too in case if anyone wondered.

 

Any suggestions. guys what do you think what are some good ideas from you

[Winfield]

OK, so let me begin by asking what's more important - a birthday present or being homeless?

 

Maybe this is what your boyfriend was faced with when it was your birthday, especially now since he's the main source of income for both himself and his mother. Remember, he didn't forget your birthday - he sent you a card saying some thoughtful things in it, letting you know that you're on his mind (it's the THOUGHT that counts, after all).

 

Or would you prefer he hadn't sent you the card? Material things (while nice) are NOT what a relationship is all about (if you were to bring this subject up with him, I bet he'll have regretted having bought you those gifts at Christmas). Just be greatful for what he's already given you.

 

Perhaps the major changes in his home life are getting him down. Maybe he needs a bit of time to himself to get his head around his mother coming back, the issues he has with his father and his personal injury...

 

Give him time, and remember that gifts are not the "be all and end all" of relationships.

[SGB8098]

He took me to a restarnt I have been wanting to go to for months but since he never took me there I stopped suggesting it since I thought he wasn't interested. It was nice quiet great food and we talked during the meal. I sent him an email card and gave him one. And he gave me a card ... all it said was you are a wonderful person. No offense but wonderful wasn't the word i was seeking in a 10 month dinner.

 

But, I am happy that we both seemed to enjoy each others company.

 

See, I'm a girly girl he's kinda lazy For v-day I got him nice designer clothes he hasn't worn. I totally understand that. I'm am not trying to change who he is , i mean thats what I love about him. I also made hima little coupon book, lol HE loved that . lol

 

Anyways, He's b-day is coming up mid twenties and he's a mechanic, man that has served our country over seas that loves alternative music and rebuilding cars.

 

Any suggestion's on some not too romantic but quality though of gift to give him We will be spending the weekend to take it easy in NC in a couple weeks. too

 

Thank you

[MWC_LifeBeginsAt40]

I think he will appreciate a gift from the heart over something you buy him. Something that will ease his insecurities (he thought you were cheating cuz you were happy?). He sounds a bit depressed, so go all out and plan a fun-filled day to lift his spirits.

[SGB8098]

yeah he did think iwas cheating, but so did i cause he was being distant and i brought it up , i asked if he had been cheating and he replied no, i thought you were you seem happy. No offense, but even if you are unhappy that is no reason why I should be unhappy. I like to have fun enjoy myself.

 

 

But I hope last night it was genuine. He does have a lot on his mind right now. I have asked hi if I can help out in any way , he knows he can chat with me anytime , lol it's funny he's like man you act like my mom but hey at least he knows i'm there and not ignoring him.

I had the idea of bring rose petals for our weekend away and surprise him with it on the bed with either beer he likes or something he favors. but i figured that's too foo foo for him lol , what can i say i like romance and before him i had never been in a romance .

 

Any suggestions?

 

Thank you

 

 

What do you think?