BigBadBaldBilly Posted June 1, 2018 Share Posted June 1, 2018 Little details about me.... 2x divorced with 2 kids, early 40's. MBA graduate and fairly successful. I also am fairly happy with my life as a man living alone. I am white and always lived in the U.S. Her.....1 x divorced with 2 kids, early 30's going to college, from Nigeria and had a serious issue in her life (raped) about 8 months ago and has been dealing with some court issues with the trial and such and also backlash from some idiots not happy she pressed charges (long story but basically different regions hate each other). As far as I understand, it is all over now, sentencing and all about last week or should be done this week. I feel stupid asking for advice but I want to make sure I am handling this correctly, being supportive and understanding, and not over reacting. We have been dating since March and we live about 90 miles apart so we don't see each other every day. We used to talk every day on the phone and text fairly often during the day. Whenever we are together we enjoy our time together and she is very loving and sweet. I have met her kids and she has met one of mine. I recently went to see her for 1 day over this past weekend and spent the night. We had a great night and everything seemed fine. We kissed and said I love you to each other and I headed home. She text me later that night asking how my drive was and I responded. Next day I text her in the morning to say good morning and I love you. She responded 6 hours later - hello my love, how are you. I love you too. I responded about an hour later that I was ok and asked how she was. No response. So Wednesday morning I text her saying good morning, are you ok? Havent heard from you in a bit... miss you. She responded an hour later - Hi honey, miss you too. I will call later if you will be awake. I text 2 hours later - ok, that works. No call, no text from her the rest of that day and now I have not received anything from her at all. I did not text this morning because I feel like I will seem needy and don't want to chase after anyone for their attention. Now, I know a lot has happened to her with the above case and she started working more hours but it upsets me she doesn't at least reach out every once and awhile. When we do talk on the phone it is for a minimum of 1.5 hours but that hasn't happened since May 25th. I am not concerned with an answer to take awhile because people do get busy but to not have any time to say hi or ask how I am doing in 2 days? Then say she will call and not? She has said she wants to marry me and has talked about me to her family so she hasn't hid me from anyone. She also has applied for jobs close to me and is talking of moving near me so when can be together more. Now, I don't mean this offensively but she is female and I know sometimes everyone just likes being left alone. I know she has a lot of stress right now with her life as well. I am looking for opinions on what I should do? Should I now wait for her to contact me since I reached out a few times? Should I say good morning tomorrow like normal? Or should I genuinely be concerned about her distance she does every so often? I have read so much on this and gotten opinions from co-workers but I am looking for any and all advice I can get.... Opinions welcome, please? If you need any more info, let me know. Thank you all for your time. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 1, 2018 Share Posted June 1, 2018 Stop trying to run a relationship via text Call her. Talk to her. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted June 1, 2018 Share Posted June 1, 2018 A big bald guy of 40 something sure knows how to dial a phone right? If you are to invest time in this long distance for a while forget about texting and use the phone. Hearing each others voice will maintain a better connection than texting. How long have you been dating? When couples reach the ILY stage there should be a trust and comfort between you 2 that everything is alright and if the person doesn't reply it's because they have a genuine situation and they can't at the moment. There should not be any fear of texting twice or calling twice - that's for beginners not for established relationships. Call. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BigBadBaldBilly Posted June 1, 2018 Author Share Posted June 1, 2018 Lol well I'm not actually bald or named Billy, I just love the name. Anyways, i appreciate both your advice and you are right. I will call, I'm too old to worry about texting. Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
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