imnottheone Posted May 25, 2018 Share Posted May 25, 2018 Hello i have a situation , i think i love her , everything started in december 2017 This girl i like very much has a boyfriend 4 years LTR and 8 months LDR . Anyway there was a rumour that they had broken up so i asked her if its true and she told me that it isnt she is still with him and asked me what is my reason for asking . I told her that i like her . She was hanging out with this other guy since from our group ( ill just call him guy A ) since september 2017, going for walks in the park , eating , going for cofee stuff like that She started texting me like crazy and sending me selfies of herself , she was telling me everything she was doing daily and ofc i was very happy this happened . Thing is she was never asking about me . What do i like to do , about my parents general stuff like that. She was telling me that she doesnt get along with her boyfriend anymore and that she is thinking of breaking up with him and i asked her if she wanted to start a thing with me and she said that she doesnt know yet After about a week of texting she invited me to hang out in her car late at night we talked like always and after 2 weeks i went to her place . We watched a movie but i was kinda distant because knowing she has a boyfriend i didnt wanna cross any kind of line . After the movie she went to sleep , i slept too and after i left her place she texted me why was i so distant and i told her that im a little shy and a virgin and i told her "i guess now that u know im a virgin you dont see me as a potential boyfriend anymore and she says "no dont worry about it , but is it because you wanted to be or .. ? "and i told her "i just didnt find the right girl yet " 2nd time i went to her place things got a little more physical , she started a wrestle with me and she got on top of me but stoped moving like she wasnt moving AT ALL so i started massaging her back from under her shirt and kiss her neck ( I told her if i do something wrong to tell me and she told me to keep going ) but when i reached in her pants she took my hand away and said no, she would let me touch her ass but not from under her panties.Anyway i kept massaging her and that was all . Thing is when i was at her place she was texting with Guy A she even went to talk to him in the bathroom (my friends told me i should have left then ) After i left her place she told me that she is sorry and that she got carried away and asked me "how far were you gonna go ? " and i said "i dont know as far as you would have let me . Did you wanted to go all the way ? " and she said "No it was good as far as it went " . Thing became distant between us just a couple of text here and there and in april we started talking again . Whenever we would hang out she notices guys checking her out alot , for example we were at a car wash and the guy with the car behind us told her that her front tier need more air which was true and she was like " did you see how he looked at me ? if we were staying any longer he would have offered to solve it himself " stuff like this Another example when the guys noticed me checking her out in leggings they started making jokes and she really wanted to know which guys commented on how she looked in leggings she insisted 2 times I went to her place 3rd time and same thing watched a movie and after that she went to sleep with her back turned on me and i grabbed her from behind trying to escalate things a little bit , pressed my dick on her ass and while trying to "adjust my sleep position " i was pressing on her ass a little more but again she didnt do anything she was just staying with her back turned on me . In the morning we cuddled she got on top of me and i grabbed her ass with both hands and sayd good morning she sayd "i had a dirty dream with you "and i asked her "what was i doing in the dream ? was i any good ? "and she sayd im too ashamed to tell you . She left for work and that was that After that day i wanted to invite her to hang out and she was already to the park with Guy A and i told her "i though that u told me that u wanting him to keep distance , thats the kind of distance you want ? " . He even voted one of her facebook pictures with heart like but he changed it to a normal like and i asked her if they are toghether or something she said " ofc not i told him to change the heart like into a normal like , just because we hang out alot he thinks that he can just do stuff like that ? " . Her boyfriend is the only guy that gives her hearts . I was talking with a bunch of friend Guy A was there and he said that he knows for sure that she broke up with her boyfriend . I asked her about it and she said that its not true . She still has pictures with him on her phone , she still texts with him alot , and she has a framed picture of the two of them on her phone . And i told her "You know a good friend of Guy A knows for sure that you and Guy A had sex , why would he say that ? " she replied "you how they all like to gossip .Dont listen to them . " I was thinking if she was having sex with Guy A why would she need me ? just to stay and cuddle with me ? it doesnt make sense Thing is that now we are distant again because she got upset for asking about alex too much and she said that im jealous My friends say that everything for her was a game and she is using me and Guy A for cuddling and nothing more she isnt having sex with him either and that i should just mind my own business because she is a tease . Are they right ? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 25, 2018 Share Posted May 25, 2018 Your friends are right. Listen to them. This is not a quality girl. She's a teaser & cheater. Do not give this girl your heart. She will break it & toss it away like garbage. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author imnottheone Posted May 25, 2018 Author Share Posted May 25, 2018 Your friends are right. Listen to them. This is not a quality girl. She's a teaser & cheater. Do not give this girl your heart. She will break it & toss it away like garbage. i kinda get what your saying in january we kinda had a fight and she stoped contact with me so easily , until april when she started talking to me again do you think there is something going on between her and Guy A ? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 25, 2018 Share Posted May 25, 2018 I have no idea. Does it really matter? The fact that you even think there is & you & guy A are in the same friend group already makes things awkward. On top of that she has a Boyfriend. Let's not forget about the poor clueless sap she is cheating on. Remember if she cheats with you, she will cheat on you. If you are happy to continue to enjoy the sexual benefits she is bestowing on you, I'm not going to tell you to stop. I am cautioning you to remember whatever she's doing with you she is doing to at least 1 other guy, possibly 2. So be careful. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author imnottheone Posted May 25, 2018 Author Share Posted May 25, 2018 I have no idea. Does it really matter? The fact that you even think there is & you & guy A are in the same friend group already makes things awkward. On top of that she has a Boyfriend. Let's not forget about the poor clueless sap she is cheating on. Remember if she cheats with you, she will cheat on you. If you are happy to continue to enjoy the sexual benefits she is bestowing on you, I'm not going to tell you to stop. I am cautioning you to remember whatever she's doing with you she is doing to at least 1 other guy, possibly 2. So be careful. One last question . Some of my friends told me that she wanted to have sex with me even though she pulled my hand away and said no , that i should have tried later that night . But because i was clumsy she lost interest Are they correct? i know the saying "if she cheats with you she will cheat on you " but the only thing that kept me going with her was the hope that if we would become a couple she would change , because i heard that some couples were formed this way and are happily married Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted May 25, 2018 Share Posted May 25, 2018 Listen to your friends.......... Link to post Share on other sites
Author imnottheone Posted May 25, 2018 Author Share Posted May 25, 2018 Listen to your friends.......... i wished so much for things to work some friends told me that she lost interest in me because i was clumsy that night , she wanted sex but i screwed up do you think they are right? Link to post Share on other sites
ItsJustMyOpinion Posted May 25, 2018 Share Posted May 25, 2018 Dude, she wants to have a good time and is offering herself on a platter for you. She's also proven she's not girlfriend material. Have some fun and enjoy yourself with her. Don't turn it into a relationship, she's not worth it. I didn't read much else because it doesn't really matter. Link to post Share on other sites
Author imnottheone Posted May 25, 2018 Author Share Posted May 25, 2018 (edited) Dude, she wants to have a good time and is offering herself on a platter for you. She's also proven she's not girlfriend material. Have some fun and enjoy yourself with her. Don't turn it into a relationship, she's not worth it. I didn't read much else because it doesn't really matter. if she offered herself on a platter why did she took my hand away and said no ? she said that she cant have sex unless she is in a relationship Edited May 25, 2018 by imnottheone Link to post Share on other sites
ItsJustMyOpinion Posted May 25, 2018 Share Posted May 25, 2018 Someday, you'll need to learn that women don't like to be considered sluts, or easy. Sometimes, and you need to read the situation right obviously, but sometimes, they want to be overcome and taken. A playful no is sometimes an invitation to be a bit more aggressive. Don't be stupid though. If you can't read the situation right, practice! Don't be an idiot. Don't misread the situation. I'm not condoning rape. However, I've had experiences with women verbalizing "we are not going to have sex" while climbing on top of me with her boyfriend passed out upstairs at a party or after he left the party. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted May 25, 2018 Share Posted May 25, 2018 Like Cyndi Lauper said, Girls just want to have fun. Some more than others. This one likes attention but doesn't want anyone telling her who or what to do. Doesn't sound like a good first for you. Get someone you understand. Link to post Share on other sites
Author imnottheone Posted May 25, 2018 Author Share Posted May 25, 2018 Like Cyndi Lauper said, Girls just want to have fun. Some more than others. This one likes attention but doesn't want anyone telling her who or what to do. Doesn't sound like a good first for you. Get someone you understand. if she likes to sleep around why doesnt she just break up with her curent boyfriend , she wouldnt need to hide anymore and why didnt she had sex with me ? From what i heard girls that like to sleep around when they are in bed with another guy they dont wait for him to make the move they just make it happen To me it seems she just likes to cuddle Link to post Share on other sites
ItsJustMyOpinion Posted May 25, 2018 Share Posted May 25, 2018 Oh my god. Yeah man she likes to cuddle. Go with that. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Lotsgoingon Posted May 25, 2018 Share Posted May 25, 2018 Seems like she wants to have sex with you ... but wants you to take the initiative on this ... You on the other hand don't have the confidence to straight up say you want to sleep with her ... that dream story she told you ... that was pretty much her telling you that she wanted to sleep with you. But ... the truth is you will be burned and hurt if you sleep with her ... because you are a virgin ... and not as experienced as she is ... and she does not want to date you ... Again, she does not want to date you ... She's willing to play around ... She does not want to date you ... Sleeping with her won't change that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author imnottheone Posted May 25, 2018 Author Share Posted May 25, 2018 Oh my god. Yeah man she likes to cuddle. Go with that. Good luck. so i screwed up damittt if i would have knowed how to act she might have actualy wanted to be with me i dont get it i told her im a virgin and that im not good with this kind of stuff from the start Link to post Share on other sites
Author imnottheone Posted May 25, 2018 Author Share Posted May 25, 2018 Seems like she wants to have sex with you ... but wants you to take the initiative on this ... You on the other hand don't have the confidence to straight up say you want to sleep with her ... that dream story she told you ... that was pretty much her telling you that she wanted to sleep with you. But ... the truth is you will be burned and hurt if you sleep with her ... because you are a virgin ... and not as experienced as she is ... and she does not want to date you ... Again, she does not want to date you ... She's willing to play around ... She does not want to date you ... Sleeping with her won't change that. i told her that i wanted to have sex with her and she said that she doesnt because we are not in a relationship i asked her to be fwb and she said no , she said "these kind of stuff you need to do with someone thats in a relationship , if you do it eventualy you will catch feelings for that person and thats not a good idea " Link to post Share on other sites
marky00 Posted May 25, 2018 Share Posted May 25, 2018 I've had experiences with women verbalizing "we are not going to have sex" while climbing on top of me with her boyfriend passed out upstairs at a party or after he left the party. LOL .... u dirty rat .... nice of u to wait till he left the party Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 25, 2018 Share Posted May 25, 2018 How old are you two? I'm not about to give a minor instructions on how to get laid. Link to post Share on other sites
Author imnottheone Posted May 25, 2018 Author Share Posted May 25, 2018 How old are you two? I'm not about to give a minor instructions on how to get laid. im 27 she is 20 i dont get it she wanted to have sex with me but took my hand away and said no , when i tried to kiss her she didnt kiss me back im confused Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 25, 2018 Share Posted May 25, 2018 OK. This is the other problem with "girls like her." No is supposed to mean no. You understood that & when she took your hand away you respected the boundary you thought she was drawing. Problem is she doesn't want to be responsible for her own sexuality. She wants cover when her BF asks her why she cheated. She wants you to "talk her into it" by repeatedly testing the boundary until she "has no choice" but to give in. Girls like her are waaaayyyyy more trouble then they are worth Link to post Share on other sites
Author imnottheone Posted May 25, 2018 Author Share Posted May 25, 2018 OK. This is the other problem with "girls like her." No is supposed to mean no. You understood that & when she took your hand away you respected the boundary you thought she was drawing. Problem is she doesn't want to be responsible for her own sexuality. She wants cover when her BF asks her why she cheated. She wants you to "talk her into it" by repeatedly testing the boundary until she "has no choice" but to give in. Girls like her are waaaayyyyy more trouble then they are worth ok but i wanted to continue seeing her after the fight in january and she said that she doesnt want to anymore because thing will most likely lead to sex , so she kinda admitted that she wanted it but didnt wanna go that far ? if she wanted it im guessing she would have let me to test her boundary instead she stop seeing me until april when i went to her house 3rd time Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 25, 2018 Share Posted May 25, 2018 More evidence that she's not worth the trouble. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted May 25, 2018 Share Posted May 25, 2018 if she likes to sleep around why doesnt she just break up with her curent boyfriend , she wouldnt need to hide anymore and why didnt she had sex with me ? From what i heard girls that like to sleep around when they are in bed with another guy they dont wait for him to make the move they just make it happen To me it seems she just likes to cuddle I didn't say "sleep around." I said "have fun." She likes flirting with different guys and keeping a regular boyfriend too. I have no idea if she has sex with any of them. She is young and she isn't tying herself down. She has a boyfriend and may or may not be sneaking around on him, and she is spending time with different people and likes the attention of it all. I say find someone who you don't have to wonder what they're up to all the time. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lotsgoingon Posted May 26, 2018 Share Posted May 26, 2018 Unless you are very experienced, this was going to end in disaster. Think about it ... She's all on your mind right now ... you're probably occupying her mind between the times she's with other guys ... You sleep her with ... You feel intensely good ... You wanna call her the next day ... She texts you from her other man's place ... telling you she's busy. Find someone who is available ... not between and around boyfriends and exes and all of that ... Link to post Share on other sites
Author imnottheone Posted May 26, 2018 Author Share Posted May 26, 2018 Unless you are very experienced, this was going to end in disaster. Think about it ... She's all on your mind right now ... you're probably occupying her mind between the times she's with other guys ... You sleep her with ... You feel intensely good ... You wanna call her the next day ... She texts you from her other man's place ... telling you she's busy. Find someone who is available ... not between and around boyfriends and exes and all of that ... well even if i was experienced wouldnt it still end in disaster considering that i wanted a serious relationship ? or what did u mean by super experienced ? Link to post Share on other sites
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