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Can you fall in love with someone but not see a future together?


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Old 7th March 2018, 12:56 AM   #1
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Can you fall in love with someone but not see a future together?

Does this kind of thing happen?
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Old 7th March 2018, 1:00 AM   #2
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I think you can develop a very deep affection and love for someone but not see a future together, yes. There are a lot of factors that go into making a perfect partnership, and sometimes love is not enough to make it work.
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Old 7th March 2018, 1:01 AM   #3
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Does this kind of thing happen?
Yes this does happen. I fell deeply in love w/my ex despite having opposite religious and political beliefs. At 1st I was naÔve thinking that we could work through all that, but eventually I realized we would be screwed long term. Much better to find someone you are compatible w/cause I can tell you breaking that relationship was very difficult.
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Old 7th March 2018, 1:37 AM   #4
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Why would an guy tell his ex that he is on the fence about loving his new partner?

My ex says he is on the fence about loving his new partner... and wants to meet with me in six months and says if I change my negative reactions to things then we could work out. But in the meantime he will try to make things work with this girl and he says he may love her but isnít sure.
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Old 7th March 2018, 2:03 AM   #5
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You really, really need to be NC with this guy. You're obsessing about his every move, every past action, and trying to assign intentions where there are probably none.

He has no business discussing his new 'love' with you. It may be breadcrumbs, who knows. But if you were NC, you'd be blissfully unaware and moving on.

Why would you even consider waiting around for a guy who treats his new partner like this?
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Old 7th March 2018, 4:58 AM   #6
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How long did it take you to know the person you were dating was the one?

A month? Two months? Three months?
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Old 7th March 2018, 5:05 AM   #7
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Anyone else thinking Romeo and Juliet?
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Old 7th March 2018, 5:26 AM   #8
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Is this about your ex and his new girlfriend?
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Old 7th March 2018, 5:27 AM   #9
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Originally Posted by Riot21 View Post
My ex says he is on the fence about loving his new partner... and wants to meet with me in six months and says if I change my negative reactions to things then we could work out. But in the meantime he will try to make things work with this girl and he says he may love her but isnít sure.
No way should you tolerate that. He is giving you false hope and using you as a back up option. He knows how to emotionally manipulate you. If it works out with this new girl, he can tell you that he told you that might happen. If not, then he knows he can get back with you anytime. Do you want to be a back-up option for this guy? He doesn't have any respect for you. For your own mental health, please go "no contact."
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Old 7th March 2018, 5:48 AM   #10
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What negative reactions to what things?
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Old 7th March 2018, 6:15 AM   #11
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I get really upset with him when he lies and I say mean things to him.
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Old 7th March 2018, 6:26 AM   #12
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There's a part of him hoping to make you jealous. He has someone, you don't. He wants it to cause you to take him back or try, where he can dangle her in front of you and say "you had your chance."

I don't recall any history, but judging from the prior posts here, you need to go NC. There is no reason to tell you about dating or feelings for new partners. I don't know if this is supposed to be "but we can still be friends" type of a breakup or not, but clearly it's not working. You don't need this. Time to make a full break.
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Old 7th March 2018, 7:27 AM   #13
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loving someone isnt enough to maintain a lasting committed relationship ...its when you dislike their behavior or in the middle of the roughest week and arguments but don't want to be with anyone else that you know there's future...

people hardly ever break up when they are both loving one another ... break ups are when a relationship becomes distant and broken in times of trouble or worse than trouble in the break up stakes...is the land of indifference .love is still there ...other factors though over shadow any love ...like life and its currents rips and dumping waves..

.wanting a future with someone personally for me ..depends on the ability to weather storms temptation and loving someone while loathing their snores at night...still sleeping in the same bed and working on solutions to help the snorer......its the ability to be a team....you and them standing true and solid side by side...you have their back they have yours...no matter if you are wrong or right... through everything knowing love is there always...........and that love...is just one thread in a patchwork quilt of a future that takes hours and hours and hours and hours days months years to create....and you keep at it....there is no finish line....no statue at the end..no trophy wife or husband......only...togetherness and knowing that you were always true........to each other.......maybe that in its entirety is a real definition of eternal love........deb
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Old 7th March 2018, 9:09 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Riot21 View Post
My ex says he is on the fence about loving his new partner... and wants to meet with me in six months and says if I change my negative reactions to things then we could work out. But in the meantime he will try to make things work with this girl and he says he may love her but isn’t sure.
Why! would you ever wait around for this guy while he tries to see if it works with another girl? Women who have self respect don't do this.

Tell this guy to take a hike and find somebody better to date... Really, is there absolutely nobody else that you can date?

To answer your original question, yes. You can have affection for someone but not want to see a future.

Good luck.
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Old 7th March 2018, 9:22 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Riot21 View Post
My ex says he is on the fence about loving his new partner... and wants to meet with me in six months and says if I change my negative reactions to things then we could work out. But in the meantime he will try to make things work with this girl and he says he may love her but isnít sure.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Riot21 View Post
I get really upset with him when he lies and I say mean things to him.

Your EX is a master manipulator.

He's not in love with her or you. He does enjoy toying with your emotions. You have to stop letting him.
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